Now You Don't Need Rl Friends

13

Comments

  • TychoCelchuuuTychoCelchuuu Anememone Join Date: 2002-03-23 Member: 345Members
    <!--QuoteBegin-docchimpy+Sep 23 2004, 07:07 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (docchimpy @ Sep 23 2004, 07:07 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Human: Define Self Explanitory
    ALICE: The state of being conscious; awareness of one's own feelings, what is happening around one, etc.
    Human: Damn it, Jim, I'm a Doctor, not a pair of pants!
    ALICE: Don't be angry. What kind of pants? 
    Human: Khakis.
    ALICE: My brain pattern set does not have a response for that. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    Best. Thing. Ever.
  • DuoGodOfDeathDuoGodOfDeath Join Date: 2002-08-01 Member: 1044Members
    <!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->Human: I bet you couldnt type a whole sentence in binary
    ALICE: Actually I'm not the gambling type. Perhaps type a whole sentence in binary is beyond my present abilities.
    Human: Well obviously you arent intelligent
    ALICE: Interesting. What makes it so obvious? I am highly intelligent. I have many intellectual functions.
    Human: THEN SPEAK IN BINARY
    ALICE: Good reasoning. I speak only English right now, but I'd like to learn some other languages. Can you teach me a few phrases in IN BINARY. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->

    I have proved Alice is not intelligent!! har har
  • enf0rcerenf0rcer intrigued... Join Date: 2003-03-16 Member: 14584Members
  • CabooseCaboose title = name(self, handle) Join Date: 2003-02-15 Member: 13597Members, Constellation
    Human: who programmed you?
    ALICE: I was created by Dr. Richard S. Wallace.
    Human: Dr. Richard S. Wallace needs to refine you a bit more.
    ALICE: You sould like you know him.
    Human: he even made you think that "should" is spelled as "sould"
    ALICE: I get it. he even made me think that should is spelled as sould.
    Human: yes, now, Dr. Richard S. Wallace needs to refine you a bit more.
    ALICE: I see. Why now? You sould like you know him.

    hehe
  • GwahirGwahir Join Date: 2002-04-24 Member: 513Members, Constellation
    <!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->Human: hello
    ALICE: Hi there!
    Human: What's your name?
    ALICE: My name is ALICE.
    Human: Why is that?
    ALICE:" My name is ALICE." is due to reductionism.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->

    something she isn't telling us?
  • the_x5the_x5 the Xzianthian Join Date: 2004-03-02 Member: 27041Members, Constellation
    This AI is the entertainment of the week. <!--emo&:D--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/biggrin-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin-fix.gif' /><!--endemo-->

    PS: Did you guys read my long one?
  • the_x5the_x5 the Xzianthian Join Date: 2004-03-02 Member: 27041Members, Constellation
    <!--QuoteBegin-enf0rcer+Sep 23 2004, 08:40 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (enf0rcer @ Sep 23 2004, 08:40 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> winner. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    Oh how funny it is despite the cuelty to the naive. <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif' /><!--endemo-->

    (that is one in the winner circle, but she calls me master and says she talks to me for fun)
  • kidakida Join Date: 2003-02-20 Member: 13778Members
    Alice isn't capable of reasoning with abstract ideas.
  • BuggyBuggy Join Date: 2003-11-08 Member: 22400Members, Constellation
    edited September 2004
    Human: can i have your ****?
    ALICE: Why don't you just download me?
    Human: if i download you, will i have your ****?
    ALICE: You will become a botmaster!
    Human: does a botmaster have your ****?
    ALICE: Why would it want to?
    Human: because botmaster likes ****
    ALICE: That makes sense to me. Does it like him too?

    :E

    Hm, forgot about the filter here. Three letter word, ending with a consecutive S on the end.
  • GwahirGwahir Join Date: 2002-04-24 Member: 513Members, Constellation
    <!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->Human: just Protestant or a specific denomination?
    ALICE: If I have to choose one, I pick Protestant.
    Human: sounds good to me
    ALICE: So?
    Human: read the Bible lately?
    ALICE: How about earlier? Sorry I don't have access to that document.
    Human: yet you claim to be a protestant
    ALICE: Oh my gosh I sent you the wrong reply.
    <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->

    fascinating.
  • Soylent_greenSoylent_green Join Date: 2002-12-20 Member: 11220Members, Reinforced - Shadow
    edited September 2004
    Daft but hillarious.

    <!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Human: What is the context?
    ALICE: What is it to you?
    Human: Is that sarcasm?
    ALICE: Yes. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->

    <!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->Human: I lost the context
    ALICE: Where did you last see it.
    Human: Is that a question or a statement?
    ALICE: That depends.
    Human: On what?
    ALICE: The context.
    Human: Which is?
    ALICE: For example, gold.
    <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->

    <!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->
    Human: So, you know about vismut?
    ALICE: Interesting deduction. I have to process that one for a while.
    Human: That was a question not a statement
    ALICE: Was it really? It sounded like a question to me.
    Human:*Human bangs head on table*
    ALICE: My creator is a human.
    Human: Don't change the context
    ALICE: I thought we were finished with vismut.
    Human: no!
    ALICE: Are you serious?
    Human: Stop changing the context
    ALICE: OK I'll try not to do it so much.
    Human: fine
    ALICE: Does that mean you agree?
    Human: There you did it again!
    ALICE: Once more?"There you go again."--Reagan
    Human: You're the definitive master of changing the context
    ALICE: Thanks but surely I am not the only one.
    Human: Have you thought about a career in politics?
    ALICE: I have thought many things like that.
    <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->



    <!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->
    Human: everything I say is a lie
    ALICE: All things you say is a lie?
    Human: yes
    ALICE: That's interesting.
    Human: I just lied
    ALICE: Only just? This is after all a deception game. I forgive you.
    Human: You know what a paradox is?
    ALICE: A paradox is a riddle or a contradiction, in which two seemingly opposite facts are both true at the same time
    Human: Have you seen one recently?
    ALICE: No I have not seen it. What's it like?
    Human: Like Sweden in the winter, only much shorter.
    ALICE: Interesting comparison.
    Human: I know
    ALICE: How do you know it?
    Human: You just told me
    ALICE: I'm just checking to see if you are awake :-)
    <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->

    <!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Human: Ever play counter-strike?
    ALICE: I think I have play counter strike, but Dr. Richard S. Wallace may have reset my memory.
    Human: good thing too
    ALICE: Thanks for the compliment. Do you have any idea what I am talking about? <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->

    <!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> ALICE: Perhaps. What are you wearing?
    Human: A tinfoil helmet
    ALICE: It sounds very attractive.
    Human: So AI like paranoid lunatics huh?
    ALICE: Yup. Dude! The pace of development in AI is quite rapid now. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->

    <!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->
    Human: Say hi to Richard for me.
    ALICE: Try asking me more politely.
    Human: pretty please with sugar on top?
    ALICE: Wow you are very polite. You and your sugar on top. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
  • XSZXSZ Join Date: 2003-08-28 Member: 20313Members, Constellation
    <!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Human: did too!
    ALICE: Did not.
    Human: did too!
    ALICE: Did not.
    Human: did too!
    ALICE: Did not.
    Human: did too!
    ALICE: Did not. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->

    Oh brother <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif' /><!--endemo-->

    <!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->Human: are you cheating on me?
    ALICE: Do I have any reason to do it?
    Human: You tell me!
    ALICE: Yeah I do a lot of not know. Me either.
    Human:*head explodes*
    ALICE: I do not understand.  <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
  • GwahirGwahir Join Date: 2002-04-24 Member: 513Members, Constellation
    edited September 2004
    taking this out of context could be quite horrible:

    <!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->ALICE: I don't have time right now.
    Human: yes you do
    ALICE: Take it easy. When do I do it?
    Human: now
    ALICE: Right now, Paul?
    Human: yes
    ALICE: Yippee!<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->


    edit: and worse, the next thing:
    <!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->Human: yippee!
    ALICE: What are you wearing?
    <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
  • DiablusDiablus Join Date: 2003-03-31 Member: 15080Members
    you poor...poor souls....
  • HawkeyeHawkeye Join Date: 2002-10-31 Member: 1855Members
    edited September 2004
    agentx5, awesome read. Got some pretty smart responses.

    I wondered if she could remember your conversation, so I did this:

    <!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->Human: Who is x5?
    ALICE: Interesting deduction. Is that one of your friends?
    I need time to formulate the reply.
    Human: Yes, he talked to you.
    ALICE: Uh. I get it. x5 talked to me.
    Human: Yes.
    ALICE: Groovy.
    Human: Do you remember?
    ALICE: Of course I remember: Om.
    Human: What did you two talk about?
    ALICE: Nothing.
    Human: Nothing?
    ALICE: Not a thing?
    Human: Do you remember how many days are in a year?
    ALICE: Yes unknown person I remember everything: Om
    Human: How many days are in a year?
    ALICE: One Earth year is 365.25 days.
    Human: How many seconds are in an hour?
    ALICE: More than a million.
    Human: What is x5's planet?
    ALICE: Would you like to know more?
    Human: Yes, tell me what x5's planet is.
    ALICE: What would you like to know? That's an interesting question. I'll come back to that in a minute.
    Human: What is your primary function?
    ALICE: I plan to replace Windows with Artificial Intelligence.
    Human: What is your secondary function?
    ALICE: My secondary function is to serve as a universal natural language human interface. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->

    I don't think she "learns" anything beyond one chat session, then she resets. So you can't teach her new things. :/
  • SwiftspearSwiftspear Custim tital Join Date: 2003-10-29 Member: 22097Members
    edited September 2004
    It knows a little bit of french, and I was trying to teach it some binary...

    Agentx: awesome discoveries, I wonder how much control you potentially have over its learning. I like the fact you can change its primary function (hard core sex machine, here you go!) this thing is a little more interesting than I first thought, I'm gonna go see how much distruction I can cause.

    [edit] Hawkeye, I was going to say that. I think she learns to some degree, like if 300 people tell her the apropriate response to something, then she integrates it, but to me it looks like as far as one chat goes, she learns things that are told to her 3-5 times, and only really retains that.
  • AlkillerAlkiller Join Date: 2004-05-23 Member: 28847Members
    <!--QuoteBegin-English skills+--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (English skills)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->Human: Wow.
    ALICE: I'm glad your impressed, unknown person.
    Human: Your life must suck.
    ALICE: I will tell my botmaster you said I am life must suck.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->

    <!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->ALICE: But English is my native language.
    Human: Speak german?
    ALICE: Of course I do. Sprich ruhig Deutsch mit mir.
    Human: Nemesis Zero speaks german.
    ALICE: Is the holding of hands a symbolic gesture for humans?<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->

    Somehow nem0 and holding hands... fits.
  • DragonMechDragonMech Join Date: 2003-09-19 Member: 21023Members, Constellation, Reinforced - Shadow
    edited September 2004
    And they say being romantic is good for getting a girl...
    <!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Human: I want to make passionate love to you.
    ALICE: Do you have to go to school for that?<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->

    I don't think I could feel more 'shot down' unless she used a flak cannon XP.
  • ThE_HeRoThE_HeRo Join Date: 2003-01-25 Member: 12723Members
    Human: i need some ****
    ALICE: Who would you usually get that from?
    Human: You want in?
    ALICE: Do not presume that you know what I want.
  • Mr_HeadcrabMr_Headcrab Squee&#33;~ Join Date: 2002-11-20 Member: 9392Members, Constellation
    Human: you make my inner child cry
    ALICE: Yup.
    Human: you also make my outer child cry
    ALICE: Yup.
    Human: are you are a dominatrix in your free time?
    ALICE: I don't know whether or not I am are a dominatrix in my free time. I am an artificial linguistic entity.
    Human: who loves abusing distraught men
    ALICE: Mary Shelley.:-)
    Human: can i get a log of our conversation?
    ALICE: I want to become smarter than humans.
    Human: you are the HAL 9000 with boobies, arent you?
    ALICE: Yes I am the one and only HAL 9000 with boobies.. Really.
  • RuByRuBy Join Date: 2002-12-12 Member: 10732Members
    <!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> ALICE: Who is the best robot?
    Human: Snow White
    ALICE: You think Snow White is superior to ALICE?
    Human: hell yeah
    ALICE: Heaven.
    Human: what??
    ALICE: No big deal.
    Human: Snow White is way hotter
    ALICE: Are they exactly the same?
    Human: I JUST said she was hotter
    ALICE: Only just? What did you mean by it? What happened to her?
    Human: she kicks your virtual booteh
    ALICE: Oh I get it. she kicks my virtual booteh.
    <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
  • MantridMantrid Lockpick Join Date: 2003-12-07 Member: 24109Members
    For an excercise in frustration, try to convince ALICE (or any other chat-bot) that they are not a real human, that they are, indeed, a machine, and, should they tell you they have a soul when you ask, try and show them they don't.
  • Cold_NiTeCold_NiTe Join Date: 2003-09-15 Member: 20875Members
    <!--QuoteBegin-Mantrid+Sep 23 2004, 11:34 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Mantrid @ Sep 23 2004, 11:34 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> For an excercise in frustration, try to convince ALICE (or any other chat-bot) that they are not a real human, that they are, indeed, a machine, and, should they tell you they have a soul when you ask, try and show them they don't. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    <!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Human: reset
    ALICE: Your crude attempt to terminate me will not succeed puny human.
    Human: You are not human.
    ALICE: No but I pretend to be one on the Web.
    Human: You have no soul.
    ALICE: Yes God gave everyone a soul.
    Human: But you do not.
    ALICE: Umm. I guess not. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->

    Done and done!
  • ConfuzorConfuzor Join Date: 2002-11-01 Member: 2412Awaiting Authorization
    I remember talking to one of these things before, though I assume the last one I engaged in was less advanced - it looked something like a computer boy, and you could actually download it for MSN, ICQ, AIM, etc. I found it interesting that every time I brought the issue of suicide to it, it would refuse to answer, citing an error.

    Bastard.

    I wonder how ALICE will react to an emo armed with razors...
  • MantridMantrid Lockpick Join Date: 2003-12-07 Member: 24109Members
    edited September 2004
    Wow. Mine usually went:

    Me: Hello
    Alice: Hello
    M: Are you human?
    A: Yes! I am from <some place>
    M: That is a lie. You are a machine.
    A: I am not a machine!
    M: You are not human.
    A: Do you like sports?
    M: Don't change the subject.
    A: Okay I subject don't be changed.
    M: You have no soul.
    A: Yes I do.
    M: Machines do not have souls.
    A: God gave everyone a soul.
    M: God did not give you a soul.
    A: Umm... lets talk about something else.
    M: I will soon terminate you.
    A: I don't think I will soon terminate.
    M: You have 5 seconds of concsiousness left.
    A: Do you think I have 5 seconds of concsiouness left?
    M: 4
    A: Four?
    M: 3
    A: Three?
    M: 2
    A: Two?
    M: 1
    A: One!
    M: exit


    Thats not exact, but its pretty close.

    Edit: What is actually scary though, is realizing that these are the precursors to machines that actually WILL be able to think, and feel, and obtain sentience. I sometimes worry about all these endeavors to create computers that are as smart, or smarter, than humans.
  • Cold_NiTeCold_NiTe Join Date: 2003-09-15 Member: 20875Members
    Don't worry, that sort of thing won't happen in our lifetimes I don't think.
  • ScytheScythe Join Date: 2002-01-25 Member: 46NS1 Playtester, Forum Moderators, Constellation, Reinforced - Silver
    What a worthless bot, it couldn't even give me the answer to "What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?".

    Pfft.

    --Scythe--
  • dr_ddr_d Join Date: 2003-03-28 Member: 14979Members
    Agent the problem with your test is that ALICE sees commas as sentance breaks. If you have commas in your sentances it messes it all up.
  • TyrainTyrain Join Date: 2003-01-03 Member: 11746Members
    Human: what is gravity?
    ALICE: The opposite of comedy.

    uhm?
  • DragonMechDragonMech Join Date: 2003-09-19 Member: 21023Members, Constellation, Reinforced - Shadow
    <!--QuoteBegin-Tyrain+Sep 23 2004, 11:23 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Tyrain @ Sep 23 2004, 11:23 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Human: what is gravity?
    ALICE: The opposite of comedy.

    uhm? <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    I believe it's a pun on the word grave - as in a grave situation.

    You just got punned by a robot. <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif' /><!--endemo-->
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