<!--QuoteBegin-Cyndane+Jun 23 2005, 01:05 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Cyndane @ Jun 23 2005, 01:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->I'm sorry guys, but if you can't hold it for the whole two minutes it takes to put one of those on, perhaps you should find better partners.
All I am seeing are excuses, I have yet to see anything that suggests other then opinion.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd--> Having never been in that situation, ever, I fail to see how you can judge. This has absolutley nothing to do with who your partner is, it's the pressure previosuly mentioned. Simply put it can be frustrating for a male to have to fumble with that damn package at that particular point in time. It's hardly a cop-out, it's simply part of what men have to deal with using condoms, in addition to the sensitivity issue.
Its a cop out, why? There shouldn't be any pressure, if there is pressure in the bedroom you need to find a new partner. Pleasing each other shouldn't result in any pressure.
Pressure tends to lead to horrible sexual experiences, I WOULD know from experience in that reguard.
<!--QuoteBegin-Cyndane+Jun 23 2005, 01:12 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Cyndane @ Jun 23 2005, 01:12 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->Its a cop out, why? There shouldn't be any pressure, if there is pressure in the bedroom you need to find a new partner. Pleasing each other shouldn't result in any pressure.
Pressure tends to lead to horrible sexual experiences, I WOULD know from experience in that reguard.
Statement still stands, they are excuses.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd--> What you say "shouldn't be" is, it exists, and you simply cannot wish it away. Any thing similar to this that "breaks the rhythym and changes the mood", be it a phone ringing, a baby crying, or fumbling to open a condom package, normally has a negative effect on males.
Most men dislike using condoms. I have given 2 very good reasons why and most men would agree I am sure. Now <b>PLEASE</b> get back on topic rather than debate an issue that you have personally never experienced.
moultanoCreator of ns_shiva.Join Date: 2002-12-14Member: 10806Members, NS1 Playtester, Contributor, Constellation, NS2 Playtester, Squad Five Blue, Reinforced - Shadow, WC 2013 - Gold, NS2 Community Developer, Pistachionauts
<!--QuoteBegin-Cyndane+Jun 23 2005, 12:12 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Cyndane @ Jun 23 2005, 12:12 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Its a cop out, why? There shouldn't be any pressure, if there is pressure in the bedroom you need to find a new partner. Pleasing each other shouldn't result in any pressure.
Pressure tends to lead to horrible sexual experiences, I WOULD know from experience in that reguard.
Statement still stands, they are excuses. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd--> Think about it like this. You are about to have sex with someone, not thinking too clearly, getting caught up in the moment.
Then you stop to put on a condom. First of all, the process is awkward. Its like stopping to take medication and put on your socks. Secondly, its an instant reminder of all of the possible things that can go wrong sexually. Immediately you start worrying about pregnancy, STDs, whether you will be able to sustain an erection despite not feeling anything, disappointing your partner if you don't, etc. This really kills the mood, and it doesn't surprise me in the least that a lot of guys have trouble sustaining themselves through that.
We've pretty much established this as a given moultano. <!--emo&;)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/wink-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wink-fix.gif' /><!--endemo--> Let us proceed please.
<!--QuoteBegin-Blammo8+Jun 23 2005, 09:55 AM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Blammo8 @ Jun 23 2005, 09:55 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> It doesn't matter how thin the condom is when your not circumsized it still takes away lots of sensitivity I'll refrain from getting more detailed in this
<!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd--> This is unfortunately true.
Also, if we are to go back on topic, there isn't one to discuss really, for there is no reason not to use one, if you are even a little unsure of your partners extraciricular activities before yourself.
Education of said methods is the key however too many of a certain right winged group throw education of safe sex in the same boat as worse then abstience.
<span style='color:red'>Sirus: Not appropriate at all Cyndane. </span>
Anyone have some handy dandy stats on the increase of stds correlating to the increased use of birth control medicines? I would imagine the girl wouldn't pressure as much for using a condom if she wasn't worried about getting pregnant.
moultanoCreator of ns_shiva.Join Date: 2002-12-14Member: 10806Members, NS1 Playtester, Contributor, Constellation, NS2 Playtester, Squad Five Blue, Reinforced - Shadow, WC 2013 - Gold, NS2 Community Developer, Pistachionauts
edited June 2005
<span style='color:red'>Sirus: Reply deleted due to the fact that it was responding to a post deemed inappropriate</span>
But I agree, back on topic.
Maybe this is naive of me, but I think that people are generally concerned enough about the welfare of the person they are involved with, that if people simply knew that they had anything, they would be sure to take precautions. Personally, I think they ought to make STD tests a standard part of the physical exams that people have to get for all manner of things from jobs to summer camp.
Why would I defer to you when you didn't defer to me with the abortion issue? Double standards not not kindly looked upon.
Also from a female perspective, if the male is unable to keep himself aroused by his partners presence, isn't that bit of an issue, mood or not.
Not to mention, just to make sure you don't think I'm just picking you guys, the girl should assist the guy just to make sure in case you guys don't have the dexterity to put it on quickly and easily, that way it becomes part of the foreplay.
I have never had any issues with men putting on condoms, then again perhaps I just have exceptional taste in men who have dexterity, of course I have helped out a few times.
[On topic] Making the tests standardized would be great, it would probably lower costs as the government sucks up most of the cost and then it will benefit everyone around, it can be a yearly check up much like a physical.
moultanoCreator of ns_shiva.Join Date: 2002-12-14Member: 10806Members, NS1 Playtester, Contributor, Constellation, NS2 Playtester, Squad Five Blue, Reinforced - Shadow, WC 2013 - Gold, NS2 Community Developer, Pistachionauts
<!--QuoteBegin-Cyndane+Jun 23 2005, 02:06 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Cyndane @ Jun 23 2005, 02:06 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->Why would I defer to you when you didn't defer to me with the abortion issue? Double standards not not kindly looked upon.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Well if I recall, in the abortion threads no one was debating what it felt like as a woman to have an abortion. <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif' /><!--endemo-->
<!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->Also from a female perspective, if the male is unable to keep himself aroused by his partners presence, isn't that bit of an issue, mood or not.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd--> Mere presence isn't enough. Arousal is mostly a mental thing. I've found that the excitement involved when you aren't as familiar with the person's body is more than sufficient at the beginning of a relationship, but once you get used to them it isn't nearly as automatic. It becomes mostly psychological and contextual, and an adverse mood can kill that.
[On topic] Does anyone have first hand experience of what people do when they know they have an STD? I don't want to make anybody share anything like that here, but if anyone knows anyone, or something, that's really key to the whole discussion. Do people get in denial about it often? are they responsible?
<!--QuoteBegin-Cyndane+Jun 23 2005, 02:06 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Cyndane @ Jun 23 2005, 02:06 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Making the tests standardized would be great, it would probably lower costs as the government sucks up most of the cost and then it will benefit everyone around, it can be a yearly check up much like a physical. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd--> A fair number of universities provide free/subsidized STD tests to their students, so this is definitely not impossible. Socializing medicine does have certain benefits...
OTOH letting people adapt the timeframe to match their changing relationships would seem to make more sense than a fixed period. Say providing a few free subsidized checks a year and then charging for extras (the high volume would presumably keep the cost low anyway). The most common use of tests I have seen is a mutual check that the partner is "clean", in a slightly more rigerous fashion than relying on personal honesty.
(And yes, I am trying to steer away from the ad hominems)
<!--QuoteBegin-Cyndane+Jun 23 2005, 02:06 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Cyndane @ Jun 23 2005, 02:06 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Also from a female perspective, if the male is unable to keep himself aroused by his partners presence, isn't that bit of an issue, mood or not. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd--> The world would be a more interesting place if a guy was always aroused by his partner's presence... just think of hugging people goodbye if their s/o is in the room.
And I think you have made it quite apparent that you are a very "worldly woman"
<!--QuoteBegin-Cyndane+Jun 23 2005, 01:41 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Cyndane @ Jun 23 2005, 01:41 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> I don't believe there any studies that correlate to condoms increasing the rate of STI/STDs... compared to just using the pill.
At least none that google is assisting me with. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd--> One thing did make STDs drop straight through the floor however in the mid 1980s and then, the STD rates spiked up massively again immediately after. These events both correspond exactly to the greater initial public awareness that <i>yes</i> HIV can cause AIDs in heterosexuals (which wasn't widely accepted until 1983ish). At this point, getting AIDs was the equivalent of being sentenced to death, there was no hope. Around the mid/late 1980s the first anti-retroviral drugs were developed. Correspondingly, people started dumping condoms and STD rates went back up again, because suddenly to the public what was a death sentence was suddenly "cured" (insert 10,000 rolleye smileys here, so you can see my contempt for the idea clearly).
It isn't uncommon for public rates of disease to fluctuate with technology.
<!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Does anyone have first hand experience of what people do when they know they have an STD?<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
They go:
"OH MY GOD OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD!!!111 WHAT DO I DO, OH MY GOD, MY GOD, OH MY GOD etc".
Eventually they get over it and then go along to their local clinic or doctor usually well after the **** discharge that accompanies bacterial infections for example, IE too DAMN late. They get antibiotics, which can be injected into the urethra of the male **** directly, for example gonorrhea or <i>Chlamydia</i>. In the case of herpes the warts can be directly 'burnt' off using liquid nitrogen.
Women are basically screwed because the **** is (once infected) much harder to treat as organisms like herpes colonise deeper down. This prevents recognition for a considerable time and typical treatments are not as effective. Additionally, most bacteria have pathogenicity factors that are female specific (see, bacteria hate women!).
Generally there is in a large amount of cases nothing that can be done about most STDs and you have them for life. That is, if you even <i>notice</i> the damn thing. Most STDs have no symptoms and the real answer to your question is:
"Absolutely nothing".
They wouldn't even know if there was anything infecting them to begin with and <b>they are still completely infectious</b>. Some people also assume, even when they do figure out what is going on, because they have no symptoms that they are perfectly find to have sex. So the difference between a fair amount of people who know and don't know is still; absolutely nothing.
After all, how many people here would think if they feel perfectly, 100% fine and there is <b>nothing</b> unsual going on that they could have an active disease? And be honest now...
<!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->I don't want to make anybody share anything like that here, but if anyone knows anyone, or something, that's really key to the whole discussion. Do people get in denial about it often? are they responsible?<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Some people are, but most people who do get it typically feel extreme forms of guilt particularly if the transmission was from male to female. Women often have to massively change their sexual habits and some of them can be rendered absolutely sterile. As a general rule, if you're a man living with an STD is much easier than if you are a woman.
moultanoCreator of ns_shiva.Join Date: 2002-12-14Member: 10806Members, NS1 Playtester, Contributor, Constellation, NS2 Playtester, Squad Five Blue, Reinforced - Shadow, WC 2013 - Gold, NS2 Community Developer, Pistachionauts
Do you think that if testing for stds were more prevalent that people would generally do the right thing afterwards? Do you think that most people, when they find out, would be responsible about avoiding transmission to others?
<!--QuoteBegin-moultano+Jun 23 2005, 03:49 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (moultano @ Jun 23 2005, 03:49 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Do you think that if testing for stds were more prevalent that people would generally do the right thing afterwards? <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd--> Not really. The primary problem is most people that feel perfectly fine don't realise they may still be infectious. Also, most people would not willingly submit to tests even if they are free out of general paranoia of 'the man'.
I certainly encourage testing and I thought it very responsible of you to have done so, because it's just not possible to know by looking. Now that I've thought of it, the reason they want to stick things up your urethra (pee channel) is because gonnorhea and <i>Chlamydia</i> both live in the cells up there. It's sadly the only way to get them out to see if they are present because they won't always be in urine (they hide inside your cells).
<!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->Do you think that most people, when they find out, would be responsible about avoiding transmission to others?<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Generally the case. Once people are aware and the full ramifications are explained to them they are often much more responsible. It's difficult to give precise numbers or similar, but I imagine that people with an active STD are fairly responsible about the whole thing. But again, we end up with the problem that the vast majority do not have symptoms and one failing of sex education regarding STDs is simple: They are shown the awful pictures, pussyness and such, but the actual reality is most people have nothing at all.
In my presentations, I show four pictures three normal and one that is heavily diseased. Students will never pick (until told) that ALL of the normal looking genitals <i>may</i> be infected.
<span style='color:red'>The following post is of a very sensitive nature and should be viewed with discretion.</span>
<a href='http://www.stanford.edu/group/SHPRC/ch4_ora.html' target='_blank'><b>Oral Sex and STDs</b></a>
Many people are unclear on the risks associated with oral sex. Questions about oral sex and the risk of contracting an STD are very common in outreaches and at the SHPRC. Many people engage in unprotected oral sex, and are particularly concerned with the risks associated with not using protection.
<b>What are the risks:</b><ul><li>Herpes is probably the biggest STD risk during oral sex. Both strains of herpes can live in the mouth or the genitals, and particularly during outbreaks (cold sores, herpes lesions) can be passed from one place to the other. Many people have oral herpes, more than 50% of a random group of people will have antibodies to the virus (indicating some level of infection). Having oral herpes for most people is no big deal, a cold sore during times of stress or illness is usually little more than an annoyance. Genital herpes can be more complicated and uncomfortable, but there are treatments (see Herpes Fact Sheet for more info). Care should be taken so that oral herpes are not passed to anyone’s genitals. In general it is not a good idea to have unprotected oral sex while any lesions are present. </li><li>Chlamydia and gonorrhea can infect your throat, strep like symptoms, and are curable with antibiotics. These can also infect the eye, and though rare, eye infections can have serious consequences, so be careful with fluids. </li><li>HIV can be passed through unprotected oral sex, but it is more likely to be passed during unprotected penetrative sex. The infected semen/precum or vaginal fluid must enter the body through a cut or sore in the mouth or esophagus. The virus is unlikely to be passed from a person’s mouth to another person’s genitals. </li><li>HPV can be passed during oral sex, but it is rare. HPV has been found on vocal chords. </li><li>Syphilis can be passed similar to HIV. Syphilis is curable. </li><li>Hepatitis A is a risk particularly in oral-anal sex, and people engaging in this unprotected might want to look into getting a Hep A vaccine. Hep A is not a chronic condition like Hep B and C, but can make a person quite sick several weeks.</li></ul><b>Reducing Risks:</b><ul><li>To reduce the risk of infection during unprotected oral sex, limit exposure to sexual fluids and ensure that no cuts or lesions are present in mouth or on genitals. </li><li>Use barrier methods — though many people feel that barrier methods detract from oral sex, they are very effective at preventing STD transmission:<ul><li>Oral-penile sex: Male condom, no spermicide (kills taste buds), flavored condoms are available. </li><li>Oral-vaginal sex: Dental dams (aka Lollys) — can buy them, or you can use non-microwaveable saran wrap, or cut up a latex glove. </li><li>Oral-anal sex: Dental dams, non-microwaveable saran wrap, cut up latex glove</li></ul> </li><li>Spit or swallow? Limiting exposure to semen reduces risk of infection, so ejaculation away from partner’s body is the safest. That said, the mouth is the place most likely to contract something like HIV, so the conventional wisdom is, “swallow or spit, just don’t let it sit.”</li></ul>
Hrm, HIV is rarely spread by Oral sex and you'd have to be damn unlucky to get it this way.
1. They need to have gingivitis, preferably as severe as possible.
2. Biters or behaviour that will draw blood will increase the risk (Otherwise it is destroyed in the stomach usually)
3. Stomach ulceration and severly compromised gut pH (you'd not be doing much if you had this though <!--emo&;)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/wink-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wink-fix.gif' /><!--endemo-->).
HIV is spread best through anal sex (tissue damage is highest), secondarily through vaginal sex and then other ways come after. It is not very common for HIV to be spread orally.
<!--QuoteBegin-Cyndane+Jun 23 2005, 05:02 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Cyndane @ Jun 23 2005, 05:02 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Yes, lets throw out my opinion because I do not have male antomy... <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd--> "Men Are From Mars, Women Are from Venus" - I suggest you read it.
<!--QuoteBegin-moultano+Jun 23 2005, 05:04 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (moultano @ Jun 23 2005, 05:04 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Just for curiosities sake, what is your primary job Aegeri? I believe you've mentioned it in another thread, but I can't remember.
Do you think people would be more apt to put up with being tested if it were part of standard physicals? <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd--> Perhaps, but how many people do you know (besides me) who get annual physicals?
<!--QuoteBegin-Cyndane+Jun 23 2005, 04:02 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Cyndane @ Jun 23 2005, 04:02 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Yes, lets throw out my opinion because I do not have male antomy...<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd--> What? It just makes no sense. If you're talking about how hard/easy it is to get a condom on in a hurry, then yea, you can talk. But you have NO IDEA how it actually <i>feels</i> to the male when compared with "unsafe" sex, which is what is being discussed.
Comments
All I am seeing are excuses, I have yet to see anything that suggests other then opinion.
All I am seeing are excuses, I have yet to see anything that suggests other then opinion.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Having never been in that situation, ever, I fail to see how you can judge. This has absolutley nothing to do with who your partner is, it's the pressure previosuly mentioned. Simply put it can be frustrating for a male to have to fumble with that damn package at that particular point in time. It's hardly a cop-out, it's simply part of what men have to deal with using condoms, in addition to the sensitivity issue.
Pressure tends to lead to horrible sexual experiences, I WOULD know from experience in that reguard.
Statement still stands, they are excuses.
Pressure tends to lead to horrible sexual experiences, I WOULD know from experience in that reguard.
Statement still stands, they are excuses.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
What you say "shouldn't be" is, it exists, and you simply cannot wish it away. Any thing similar to this that "breaks the rhythym and changes the mood", be it a phone ringing, a baby crying, or fumbling to open a condom package, normally has a negative effect on males.
Most men dislike using condoms. I have given 2 very good reasons why and most men would agree I am sure. Now <b>PLEASE</b> get back on topic rather than debate an issue that you have personally never experienced.
Pressure tends to lead to horrible sexual experiences, I WOULD know from experience in that reguard.
Statement still stands, they are excuses. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
Think about it like this. You are about to have sex with someone, not thinking too clearly, getting caught up in the moment.
Then you stop to put on a condom. First of all, the process is awkward. Its like stopping to take medication and put on your socks. Secondly, its an instant reminder of all of the possible things that can go wrong sexually. Immediately you start worrying about pregnancy, STDs, whether you will be able to sustain an erection despite not feeling anything, disappointing your partner if you don't, etc. This really kills the mood, and it doesn't surprise me in the least that a lot of guys have trouble sustaining themselves through that.
<!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
This is unfortunately true.
Education of said methods is the key however too many of a certain right winged group throw education of safe sex in the same boat as worse then abstience.
<span style='color:red'>Sirus: Not appropriate at all Cyndane. </span>
At least none that google is assisting me with.
But I agree, back on topic.
Maybe this is naive of me, but I think that people are generally concerned enough about the welfare of the person they are involved with, that if people simply knew that they had anything, they would be sure to take precautions. Personally, I think they ought to make STD tests a standard part of the physical exams that people have to get for all manner of things from jobs to summer camp.
Also from a female perspective, if the male is unable to keep himself aroused by his partners presence, isn't that bit of an issue, mood or not.
Not to mention, just to make sure you don't think I'm just picking you guys, the girl should assist the guy just to make sure in case you guys don't have the dexterity to put it on quickly and easily, that way it becomes part of the foreplay.
I have never had any issues with men putting on condoms, then again perhaps I just have exceptional taste in men who have dexterity, of course I have helped out a few times.
[On topic]
Making the tests standardized would be great, it would probably lower costs as the government sucks up most of the cost and then it will benefit everyone around, it can be a yearly check up much like a physical.
Well if I recall, in the abortion threads no one was debating what it felt like as a woman to have an abortion. <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif' /><!--endemo-->
<!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->Also from a female perspective, if the male is unable to keep himself aroused by his partners presence, isn't that bit of an issue, mood or not.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Mere presence isn't enough. Arousal is mostly a mental thing. I've found that the excitement involved when you aren't as familiar with the person's body is more than sufficient at the beginning of a relationship, but once you get used to them it isn't nearly as automatic. It becomes mostly psychological and contextual, and an adverse mood can kill that.
[On topic]
Does anyone have first hand experience of what people do when they know they have an STD? I don't want to make anybody share anything like that here, but if anyone knows anyone, or something, that's really key to the whole discussion. Do people get in denial about it often? are they responsible?
A fair number of universities provide free/subsidized STD tests to their students, so this is definitely not impossible. Socializing medicine does have certain benefits...
OTOH letting people adapt the timeframe to match their changing relationships would seem to make more sense than a fixed period. Say providing a few free subsidized checks a year and then charging for extras (the high volume would presumably keep the cost low anyway). The most common use of tests I have seen is a mutual check that the partner is "clean", in a slightly more rigerous fashion than relying on personal honesty.
(And yes, I am trying to steer away from the ad hominems)
The world would be a more interesting place if a guy was always aroused by his partner's presence... just think of hugging people goodbye if their s/o is in the room.
And I think you have made it quite apparent that you are a very "worldly woman"
At least none that google is assisting me with. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
One thing did make STDs drop straight through the floor however in the mid 1980s and then, the STD rates spiked up massively again immediately after. These events both correspond exactly to the greater initial public awareness that <i>yes</i> HIV can cause AIDs in heterosexuals (which wasn't widely accepted until 1983ish). At this point, getting AIDs was the equivalent of being sentenced to death, there was no hope. Around the mid/late 1980s the first anti-retroviral drugs were developed. Correspondingly, people started dumping condoms and STD rates went back up again, because suddenly to the public what was a death sentence was suddenly "cured" (insert 10,000 rolleye smileys here, so you can see my contempt for the idea clearly).
It isn't uncommon for public rates of disease to fluctuate with technology.
<!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->
Does anyone have first hand experience of what people do when they know they have an STD?<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
They go:
"OH MY GOD OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD!!!111 WHAT DO I DO, OH MY GOD, MY GOD, OH MY GOD etc".
Eventually they get over it and then go along to their local clinic or doctor usually well after the **** discharge that accompanies bacterial infections for example, IE too DAMN late. They get antibiotics, which can be injected into the urethra of the male **** directly, for example gonorrhea or <i>Chlamydia</i>. In the case of herpes the warts can be directly 'burnt' off using liquid nitrogen.
Women are basically screwed because the **** is (once infected) much harder to treat as organisms like herpes colonise deeper down. This prevents recognition for a considerable time and typical treatments are not as effective. Additionally, most bacteria have pathogenicity factors that are female specific (see, bacteria hate women!).
Generally there is in a large amount of cases nothing that can be done about most STDs and you have them for life. That is, if you even <i>notice</i> the damn thing. Most STDs have no symptoms and the real answer to your question is:
"Absolutely nothing".
They wouldn't even know if there was anything infecting them to begin with and <b>they are still completely infectious</b>. Some people also assume, even when they do figure out what is going on, because they have no symptoms that they are perfectly find to have sex. So the difference between a fair amount of people who know and don't know is still; absolutely nothing.
After all, how many people here would think if they feel perfectly, 100% fine and there is <b>nothing</b> unsual going on that they could have an active disease? And be honest now...
<!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->I don't want to make anybody share anything like that here, but if anyone knows anyone, or something, that's really key to the whole discussion. Do people get in denial about it often? are they responsible?<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Some people are, but most people who do get it typically feel extreme forms of guilt particularly if the transmission was from male to female. Women often have to massively change their sexual habits and some of them can be rendered absolutely sterile. As a general rule, if you're a man living with an STD is much easier than if you are a woman.
Not really. The primary problem is most people that feel perfectly fine don't realise they may still be infectious. Also, most people would not willingly submit to tests even if they are free out of general paranoia of 'the man'.
I certainly encourage testing and I thought it very responsible of you to have done so, because it's just not possible to know by looking. Now that I've thought of it, the reason they want to stick things up your urethra (pee channel) is because gonnorhea and <i>Chlamydia</i> both live in the cells up there. It's sadly the only way to get them out to see if they are present because they won't always be in urine (they hide inside your cells).
<!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->Do you think that most people, when they find out, would be responsible about avoiding transmission to others?<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Generally the case. Once people are aware and the full ramifications are explained to them they are often much more responsible. It's difficult to give precise numbers or similar, but I imagine that people with an active STD are fairly responsible about the whole thing. But again, we end up with the problem that the vast majority do not have symptoms and one failing of sex education regarding STDs is simple: They are shown the awful pictures, pussyness and such, but the actual reality is most people have nothing at all.
In my presentations, I show four pictures three normal and one that is heavily diseased. Students will never pick (until told) that ALL of the normal looking genitals <i>may</i> be infected.
<a href='http://www.stanford.edu/group/SHPRC/ch4_ora.html' target='_blank'><b>Oral Sex and STDs</b></a>
Many people are unclear on the risks associated with oral sex. Questions about oral sex and the risk of contracting an STD are very common in outreaches and at the SHPRC. Many people engage in unprotected oral sex, and are particularly concerned with the risks associated with not using protection.
<b>What are the risks:</b><ul><li>Herpes is probably the biggest STD risk during oral sex. Both strains of herpes can live in the mouth or the genitals, and particularly during outbreaks (cold sores, herpes lesions) can be passed from one place to the other. Many people have oral herpes, more than 50% of a random group of people will have antibodies to the virus (indicating some level of infection). Having oral herpes for most people is no big deal, a cold sore during times of stress or illness is usually little more than an annoyance. Genital herpes can be more complicated and uncomfortable, but there are treatments (see Herpes Fact Sheet for more info). Care should be taken so that oral herpes are not passed to anyone’s genitals. In general it is not a good idea to have unprotected oral sex while any lesions are present. </li><li>Chlamydia and gonorrhea can infect your throat, strep like symptoms, and are curable with antibiotics. These can also infect the eye, and though rare, eye infections can have serious consequences, so be careful with fluids. </li><li>HIV can be passed through unprotected oral sex, but it is more likely to be passed during unprotected penetrative sex. The infected semen/precum or vaginal fluid must enter the body through a cut or sore in the mouth or esophagus. The virus is unlikely to be passed from a person’s mouth to another person’s genitals. </li><li>HPV can be passed during oral sex, but it is rare. HPV has been found on vocal chords. </li><li>Syphilis can be passed similar to HIV. Syphilis is curable. </li><li>Hepatitis A is a risk particularly in oral-anal sex, and people engaging in this unprotected might want to look into getting a Hep A vaccine. Hep A is not a chronic condition like Hep B and C, but can make a person quite sick several weeks.</li></ul><b>Reducing Risks:</b><ul><li>To reduce the risk of infection during unprotected oral sex, limit exposure to sexual fluids and ensure that no cuts or lesions are present in mouth or on genitals. </li><li>Use barrier methods — though many people feel that barrier methods detract from oral sex, they are very effective at preventing STD transmission:<ul><li>Oral-penile sex: Male condom, no spermicide (kills taste buds), flavored condoms are available. </li><li>Oral-vaginal sex: Dental dams (aka Lollys) — can buy them, or you can use non-microwaveable saran wrap, or cut up a latex glove. </li><li>Oral-anal sex: Dental dams, non-microwaveable saran wrap, cut up latex glove</li></ul> </li><li>Spit or swallow? Limiting exposure to semen reduces risk of infection, so ejaculation away from partner’s body is the safest. That said, the mouth is the place most likely to contract something like HIV, so the conventional wisdom is, “swallow or spit, just don’t let it sit.”</li></ul>
<span style='color:red'>Sirus: Please refrain from ad hominem attacks. </span>
1. They need to have gingivitis, preferably as severe as possible.
2. Biters or behaviour that will draw blood will increase the risk (Otherwise it is destroyed in the stomach usually)
3. Stomach ulceration and severly compromised gut pH (you'd not be doing much if you had this though <!--emo&;)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/wink-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wink-fix.gif' /><!--endemo-->).
HIV is spread best through anal sex (tissue damage is highest), secondarily through vaginal sex and then other ways come after. It is not very common for HIV to be spread orally.
Do you think people would be more apt to put up with being tested if it were part of standard physicals?
"Men Are From Mars, Women Are from Venus" - I suggest you read it.
Do you think people would be more apt to put up with being tested if it were part of standard physicals? <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
Perhaps, but how many people do you know (besides me) who get annual physicals?
What? It just makes no sense. If you're talking about how hard/easy it is to get a condom on in a hurry, then yea, you can talk. But you have NO IDEA how it actually <i>feels</i> to the male when compared with "unsafe" sex, which is what is being discussed.