<!--QuoteBegin-Sky+Feb 9 2005, 07:09 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Sky @ Feb 9 2005, 07:09 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> <!--QuoteBegin-Fog cartoons+Feb 9 2005, 04:54 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Fog cartoons @ Feb 9 2005, 04:54 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> <!--QuoteBegin-NumbersNotFound+Feb 9 2005, 06:53 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (NumbersNotFound @ Feb 9 2005, 06:53 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->If any other nation than the USA used "soccer" in place of "football" do you think there'd ever be any controversy?<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd--> To be honest, yes. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd--> So you claim to be on the same average level of reasonability as Americans. I thought we were supposed to be so much worse than the rest of the world. Oh well, I guess Europeans aren't as cultured as the claim to be. Either that, or they're exactly the same as us, but they still like to bash us for being Americans. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd--> This post makes no sense at all.
<!--QuoteBegin-DrSuredeath+Feb 9 2005, 08:21 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (DrSuredeath @ Feb 9 2005, 08:21 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> This post makes no sense at all. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd--> That’s because you don't have the secret decoder ring.
I'm saying that Europeans constantly make fun of Americans for being hotheads, irrational, etc, but then you guys go off and get upset about this. Then you say that we would get upset if you started calling American football "soccer" in your countries, which basically puts us at the same level. So either your insults are wrong, or your assumptions are wrong.
<!--QuoteBegin-Sky+Feb 9 2005, 08:39 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Sky @ Feb 9 2005, 08:39 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> I'm saying that Europeans constantly make fun of Americans for being hotheads, irrational, etc, but then you guys go off and get upset about this. Then you say that we would get upset if you started calling American football "soccer" in your countries, which basically puts us at the same level. So either your insults are wrong, or your assumptions are wrong. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd--> Let me sum it up:
<!--QuoteBegin-NumbersNotFound+Feb 9 2005, 10:10 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (NumbersNotFound @ Feb 9 2005, 10:10 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> <!--QuoteBegin-Sky+Feb 9 2005, 08:39 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Sky @ Feb 9 2005, 08:39 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> I'm saying that Europeans constantly make fun of Americans for being hotheads, irrational, etc, but then you guys go off and get upset about this. Then you say that we would get upset if you started calling American football "soccer" in your countries, which basically puts us at the same level. So either your insults are wrong, or your assumptions are wrong. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd--> Let me sum it up:
I think football should be called soccer...it would make so much more sense (because of the distinct lack of feet being used for most of the time). Although, you try to get John Madden to say:
"ARE YOU READY FOR SOME ...SOCCER!?!?!?!?!"
...man, he'll take your twinkies <i>and</i> still not call it soccer.
GrendelAll that is fear...Join Date: 2002-07-19Member: 970Members, NS1 Playtester, Contributor, NS2 Playtester
edited February 2005
<!--QuoteBegin-Crispy+Feb 9 2005, 07:49 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Crispy @ Feb 9 2005, 07:49 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> <i>I played Rugby for my school's 1st XVII and 2nd XVII and you have to be incredibly fit unless you play front-row (that's 3 people in the team of 15), who are allowed to be fat and ugly.</i> <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd--> As someone who played as a h00ker (laugh it up), for at 1st XV level for 5 years, I take signifigant issue about the the front row not being fit.
Having to constantly scrummage with 5 guys pushing behind you and 8 in front because people in the line drop the ball rather than risk messing up their hair in a tackle ensures that the front row are actually some of the fittest people on the team.
Certainly, it ensured that I was sufficiently fit to pass the Royal Marines P.O.C., which isn't the easiest selection program in the world.
Ugly, on the other hand, is a fair remark.
[EDIT] The leetspeak version of h00ker is there because apparently it's considered too naughty to be spelt correctly. [/EDIT]
<!--QuoteBegin-UltimaGecko+Feb 10 2005, 04:06 AM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (UltimaGecko @ Feb 10 2005, 04:06 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> I think football should be called soccer...it would make so much more sense (because of the distinct lack of feet being used for most of the time). Although, you try to get John Madden to say:
"ARE YOU READY FOR SOME ...SOCCER!?!?!?!?!"
...man, he'll take your twinkies <i>and</i> still not call it soccer.
I'm partial to Neefle, myself. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd--> Can you see Hank Jr. singing, "Are you ready for some soccccccccer, a monday night party?"? He'd drop his guitar and fall over laughin so hard he couldn't finish the song ... <!--emo&:0--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/wow.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wow.gif' /><!--endemo-->
"Are you ready for some Neeeeeefle!" would be awesome though. Or we could replace the pseudo-redneck image with a ...rap image or something (as much as rap sucks).
...
<span style='font-size:4pt;line-height:100%'>Are you ready for some curling, a monday night party?</span>
<!--QuoteBegin-UltimaGecko+Feb 10 2005, 11:04 AM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (UltimaGecko @ Feb 10 2005, 11:04 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> "Are you ready for some Neeeeeefle!" would be awesome though. Or we could replace the pseudo-redneck image with a ...rap image or something (as much as rap sucks).
...
<span style='font-size:4pt;line-height:100%'>Are you ready for some curling, a monday night party?</span> <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd--> Lololol, that'll work! <!--emo&;)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/wink-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wink-fix.gif' /><!--endemo-->
<!--QuoteBegin-Sky+Feb 9 2005, 02:09 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Sky @ Feb 9 2005, 02:09 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> <!--QuoteBegin-Grendel+Feb 9 2005, 09:55 AM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Grendel @ Feb 9 2005, 09:55 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> IMHO, US Football kicks arse. It's the only turn based sport I can think of. However, Ive stopped watching it because of the amount of advertising breaks. That and because being a Bengals' fan made me cry. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd--> <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd--> Rugby Football could also be considered "Turn-Based". When the ball is moved over the boundary line, passed forward, knocked on, or in the event of a penalty then play is stopped.
If the ball goes off the sideline then a 'lineout' takes place. There are many different plays that can be had from linouts.
If the ball goes over the end line then a 'twenty-to drop-out' kick is taken. There are a few different plays that can be made from this.
If the ball is passed forward or knocked on then a 'Scrum(down)' will be taken. There are many different plays that can be had from Scrums.
In the event of a penalty a penalty kick will be taken. This can either be a slight tap forward into the hands of the kicker, who will then run with it or pass it to another player on the team; or an attempt at kicking the ball through the goal posts.
In short, Rugby could equally be considered as a turn-based sport. The reason I prefer RF to AF is because Rugby aims to be more fluid, with advantages often being played by the referee to keep the game moving, whereas AF is too stop-start for my liking.
<!--QuoteBegin-Sky+Feb 10 2005, 12:09 AM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Sky @ Feb 10 2005, 12:09 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--><!--QuoteBegin-Fog cartoons+Feb 9 2005, 04:54 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Fog cartoons @ Feb 9 2005, 04:54 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> <!--QuoteBegin-NumbersNotFound+Feb 9 2005, 06:53 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (NumbersNotFound @ Feb 9 2005, 06:53 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->If any other nation than the USA used "soccer" in place of "football" do you think there'd ever be any controversy?<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd--> To be honest, yes. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd--> So you claim to be on the same average level of reasonability as Americans. I thought we were supposed to be so much worse than the rest of the world. Oh well, I guess Europeans aren't as cultured as the claim to be. Either that, or they're exactly the same as us, but they still like to bash us for being Americans.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd--> Hold on, im slightly confused...how is what you said in any way related to what I wrote?
You are using too many 'We's and Collective plural 'You's. An opinion is held by one person (It sounds like you are threatening a whole continent there) .
All I said was that I would be anoyed if any other country would call a sport something different to what its was originally called, therefore proving its not just a 'Omg i hate america' attitude held by many.
<!--QuoteBegin-Grendel+Feb 10 2005, 05:01 AM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Grendel @ Feb 10 2005, 05:01 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> As someone who played as a h00ker (laugh it up), for at 1st XV level for 5 years, I take signifigant issue about the the front row not being fit.
Having to constantly scrummage with 5 guys pushing behind you and 8 in front because people in the line drop the ball rather than risk messing up their hair in a tackle ensures that the front row are actually some of the fittest people on the team.
Certainly, it ensured that I was sufficiently fit to pass the Royal Marines P.O.C., which isn't the easiest selection program in the world.
Ugly, on the other hand, is a fair remark. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd--> OK the **** isn't neccessarily fat or unfit, but the props most definitely are (both).
Props have got 3 speeds they can go at:<ol type='1'><li>Stop (0mph)</li><li>Walk (3-4mph)</li><li>Trundle (5-7mph)</li></ol>They can also move in reverse a MAXIMUM of 3 steps and have a turning circle of approximately 3ft <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif' /><!--endemo-->
Come on, you get a bunch of overpaid, overweight guys to get down on a field and ram into each other for an hour of gametime, except that it takes 4 hours because of the rediculous ammount of capitalism that takes place during the game. Sitting and watching the game in person is even worse, sitting on a cold bench, chomping on a cold, overpriced hotdog, and having the fat idiot next to you spill his overpriced Bud Lite on you.
Soccer sucks too.
You're telling me that world class athletes can only score two or three times a game? Come on, how lazy can you get, put some hustle into it! And how wussy do you need to be, to play a sport where the only padding you need is a little bit of foam around your shins so you don't bruise when some other meanie trys to steal the ball from you. And not using your hands? What the hell, we have opposable thumbs for a reason. And the riots, come on people! Get it together, it's just a crappy game!
While I'm at it, Baseball sucks(overpaid jerks on steroids who spend most of the game sitting down), Wrestling sucks (Psychopaths that roll around on a sweaty mat together), and Rugby sucks too(Of course, I'd never say that to a rugby player's face).
Fencing, however, owns your mom, her mom, and whatever attractive friends either of them would have. <img src='http://www.signonsandiego.com/gallery/albums/fencing/SMHfencing226936x006.sized.jpg' border='0' alt='user posted image' /> <img src='http://www.nw-fencing.org.uk/images/pagemaster/holzkamp.jpg' border='0' alt='user posted image' /> <img src='http://library.thinkquest.org/27480/fencing.jpg' border='0' alt='user posted image' /> Think about it. Two people in single combat. You score points by ramming or slashing your meter of steel into the other person, and you need to be able to move like a gymnist on the pist. Nevermind the fact that Olympic class athletes can whip the edges of their foils so fast it cracks as a whip does, or the fact that there's always the danger of someone punching through the steel cage that you have to put your head inside and killling you instantly. And oh yeah, the only thing you get otherwise to protect yourself is a nice peice of heavy cotton. That's it. Just you, a sword, and your opponent. Rock on.
BTW, sarcasm about everything except how fencing rocks your mom. It really does. Every day, in fact, and twice on Sundays.
<!--QuoteBegin-Legionnaired+Feb 10 2005, 11:22 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Legionnaired @ Feb 10 2005, 11:22 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Come on, you get a bunch of overpaid, overweight guys to get down on a field and ram into each other for an hour of gametime, except that it takes 4 hours because of the rediculous ammount of capitalism that takes place during the game. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd--> As much as your "that's all sarcastic" phrase wipes parts of this away, I'm pretty sure this part hasn't been made clear:
The game would last 3-4 hours with or without commercials. They do not add time to the game. Commercials are interjected at the following times: timeouts, after extra points, end of quarters, injuries, challenges, penalty discussions.
They do not actually halt the game and wait for a commercial to finish before resuming play. The worst you get is catch-up time. Where a commercial cuts into play, but they just run off spooled footage until it catches up to the 7 second buffer again. That is:
Play [say, someone just scored] Commercial Commercial [actual kickoff in real time] Commercial Play [kickoff is spooled] Play [instead of going through huddles and crap they just go right to the next play, since they were behind from the commercial]
And notice how the commercial doesn't really add any time to the game. The commercials just really point out how slow the game moves. As long as you have something to do during the commercials. Football players are trained for intense exertion in 10 second (or so) bursts, and then some time of rest. Instead of soccer players who are trained to more or less constantly run at a heavy jog.
Notice how wide recievers can run 50 yards a couple of seconds after the snap, and then the next play 15 seconds later they may run another (more of a 'OMG we're almost out of time!' situation).
In my opinion, soccer would be 20x better if there were no goalies (except maybe for penalty kicks), then you wouldn't need the über goalies who catch everything, and the team would work together to protect the goal. Maybe throw some walls in there to block direct shots across the field or something. Goalies just kind of bore it up; look at him catch the ball...hold the ball...hold the ball...still hold the ball....throw the ball...and play resumes.
Comments
To be honest, yes. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
So you claim to be on the same average level of reasonability as Americans. I thought we were supposed to be so much worse than the rest of the world. Oh well, I guess Europeans aren't as cultured as the claim to be. Either that, or they're exactly the same as us, but they still like to bash us for being Americans. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
This post makes no sense at all.
That’s because you don't have the secret decoder ring.
Let me sum it up:
People suck.
Let me sum it up:
People suck. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
Pretty much. <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif' /><!--endemo-->
"ARE YOU READY FOR SOME ...SOCCER!?!?!?!?!"
...man, he'll take your twinkies <i>and</i> still not call it soccer.
I'm partial to Neefle, myself.
As someone who played as a h00ker (laugh it up), for at 1st XV level for 5 years, I take signifigant issue about the the front row not being fit.
Having to constantly scrummage with 5 guys pushing behind you and 8 in front because people in the line drop the ball rather than risk messing up their hair in a tackle ensures that the front row are actually some of the fittest people on the team.
Certainly, it ensured that I was sufficiently fit to pass the Royal Marines P.O.C., which isn't the easiest selection program in the world.
Ugly, on the other hand, is a fair remark.
[EDIT] The leetspeak version of h00ker is there because apparently it's considered too naughty to be spelt correctly. [/EDIT]
"ARE YOU READY FOR SOME ...SOCCER!?!?!?!?!"
...man, he'll take your twinkies <i>and</i> still not call it soccer.
I'm partial to Neefle, myself. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
Can you see Hank Jr. singing, "Are you ready for some soccccccccer, a monday night party?"? He'd drop his guitar and fall over laughin so hard he couldn't finish the song ... <!--emo&:0--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/wow.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wow.gif' /><!--endemo-->
...
<span style='font-size:4pt;line-height:100%'>Are you ready for some curling, a monday night party?</span>
...
<span style='font-size:4pt;line-height:100%'>Are you ready for some curling, a monday night party?</span> <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
Lololol, that'll work! <!--emo&;)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/wink-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wink-fix.gif' /><!--endemo-->
Rugby Football could also be considered "Turn-Based". When the ball is moved over the boundary line, passed forward, knocked on, or in the event of a penalty then play is stopped.
If the ball goes off the sideline then a 'lineout' takes place. There are many different plays that can be had from linouts.
If the ball goes over the end line then a 'twenty-to drop-out' kick is taken. There are a few different plays that can be made from this.
If the ball is passed forward or knocked on then a 'Scrum(down)' will be taken. There are many different plays that can be had from Scrums.
In the event of a penalty a penalty kick will be taken. This can either be a slight tap forward into the hands of the kicker, who will then run with it or pass it to another player on the team; or an attempt at kicking the ball through the goal posts.
In short, Rugby could equally be considered as a turn-based sport. The reason I prefer RF to AF is because Rugby aims to be more fluid, with advantages often being played by the referee to keep the game moving, whereas AF is too stop-start for my liking.
To be honest, yes. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
So you claim to be on the same average level of reasonability as Americans. I thought we were supposed to be so much worse than the rest of the world. Oh well, I guess Europeans aren't as cultured as the claim to be. Either that, or they're exactly the same as us, but they still like to bash us for being Americans.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Hold on, im slightly confused...how is what you said in any way related to what I wrote?
You are using too many 'We's and Collective plural 'You's. An opinion is held by one person (It sounds like you are threatening a whole continent there) .
All I said was that I would be anoyed if any other country would call a sport something different to what its was originally called, therefore proving its not just a 'Omg i hate america' attitude held by many.
Having to constantly scrummage with 5 guys pushing behind you and 8 in front because people in the line drop the ball rather than risk messing up their hair in a tackle ensures that the front row are actually some of the fittest people on the team.
Certainly, it ensured that I was sufficiently fit to pass the Royal Marines P.O.C., which isn't the easiest selection program in the world.
Ugly, on the other hand, is a fair remark. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
OK the **** isn't neccessarily fat or unfit, but the props most definitely are (both).
Props have got 3 speeds they can go at:<ol type='1'><li>Stop (0mph)</li><li>Walk (3-4mph)</li><li>Trundle (5-7mph)</li></ol>They can also move in reverse a MAXIMUM of 3 steps and have a turning circle of approximately 3ft <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif' /><!--endemo-->
Come on, you get a bunch of overpaid, overweight guys to get down on a field and ram into each other for an hour of gametime, except that it takes 4 hours because of the rediculous ammount of capitalism that takes place during the game. Sitting and watching the game in person is even worse, sitting on a cold bench, chomping on a cold, overpriced hotdog, and having the fat idiot next to you spill his overpriced Bud Lite on you.
Soccer sucks too.
You're telling me that world class athletes can only score two or three times a game? Come on, how lazy can you get, put some hustle into it! And how wussy do you need to be, to play a sport where the only padding you need is a little bit of foam around your shins so you don't bruise when some other meanie trys to steal the ball from you. And not using your hands? What the hell, we have opposable thumbs for a reason. And the riots, come on people! Get it together, it's just a crappy game!
While I'm at it, Baseball sucks(overpaid jerks on steroids who spend most of the game sitting down), Wrestling sucks (Psychopaths that roll around on a sweaty mat together), and Rugby sucks too(Of course, I'd never say that to a rugby player's face).
Fencing, however, owns your mom, her mom, and whatever attractive friends either of them would have.
<img src='http://www.signonsandiego.com/gallery/albums/fencing/SMHfencing226936x006.sized.jpg' border='0' alt='user posted image' />
<img src='http://www.nw-fencing.org.uk/images/pagemaster/holzkamp.jpg' border='0' alt='user posted image' />
<img src='http://library.thinkquest.org/27480/fencing.jpg' border='0' alt='user posted image' />
Think about it. Two people in single combat. You score points by ramming or slashing your meter of steel into the other person, and you need to be able to move like a gymnist on the pist. Nevermind the fact that Olympic class athletes can whip the edges of their foils so fast it cracks as a whip does, or the fact that there's always the danger of someone punching through the steel cage that you have to put your head inside and killling you instantly. And oh yeah, the only thing you get otherwise to protect yourself is a nice peice of heavy cotton. That's it. Just you, a sword, and your opponent. Rock on.
BTW, sarcasm about everything except how fencing rocks your mom. It really does. Every day, in fact, and twice on Sundays.
As much as your "that's all sarcastic" phrase wipes parts of this away, I'm pretty sure this part hasn't been made clear:
The game would last 3-4 hours with or without commercials. They do not add time to the game. Commercials are interjected at the following times: timeouts, after extra points, end of quarters, injuries, challenges, penalty discussions.
They do not actually halt the game and wait for a commercial to finish before resuming play. The worst you get is catch-up time. Where a commercial cuts into play, but they just run off spooled footage until it catches up to the 7 second buffer again. That is:
Play [say, someone just scored]
Commercial
Commercial [actual kickoff in real time]
Commercial
Play [kickoff is spooled]
Play [instead of going through huddles and crap they just go right to the next play, since they were behind from the commercial]
And notice how the commercial doesn't really add any time to the game. The commercials just really point out how slow the game moves. As long as you have something to do during the commercials. Football players are trained for intense exertion in 10 second (or so) bursts, and then some time of rest. Instead of soccer players who are trained to more or less constantly run at a heavy jog.
Notice how wide recievers can run 50 yards a couple of seconds after the snap, and then the next play 15 seconds later they may run another (more of a 'OMG we're almost out of time!' situation).
In my opinion, soccer would be 20x better if there were no goalies (except maybe for penalty kicks), then you wouldn't need the über goalies who catch everything, and the team would work together to protect the goal. Maybe throw some walls in there to block direct shots across the field or something. Goalies just kind of bore it up; look at him catch the ball...hold the ball...hold the ball...still hold the ball....throw the ball...and play resumes.
american football ftw! *loves*