"i Never Could Get The Hang Of Thursdays"

ANeMANeM Join Date: 2003-05-13 Member: 16267Members, Constellation
<div class="IPBDescription">Whiny emo rant alert</div> I've found the best way to find a solution for problems seems to be the off-topic forums on NSF.. Though, to be honest this problem is probably one that will go unsolved as its really not a problem so much as a chain of odd coincidences. So, I submit to you, the problem of Thursdays, knowing fully well there will be no one with any good ideas on how to solve it.
This is also a way for me to whine and complain about how not fun my life has been lately.
I've also realized its easiest to whine and complain online to thousands of people who don't even know you than to talk to someone who does, simply because I don't have to worry about wasting any ones time.
Its your choice to read this. You are not under any obligation to "Be there" for me as a friend as I don't know you. If you feel your time has been wasted, maybe you shouldn't have read past this point. Hell, maybe you shouldn't have been reading this post at all. Infact, why are you on these forums if you are worried about wasting your time?

Now then. The problem.

Recently, I have found myself dreading Thursdays. Now, some might think that is because I work at a place that has a "Casual Thursdays" and I lack casual clothing or something to that extent. No. In fact, my dread of Thursdays is a complete coincidence. A horribly ironic coincidence that has nothing to do with dressing Casually, funny hats or Hawaiian shirts.

Basically, bad things keep happening to me on Thursdays. Really not nice things. Now, this isn't to say good things don't happen to me on Thursdays, infact, lots of good things do. The problem lies therein. The problem of Thursdays. Good things happen. So why is this a problem? Well, because then something bad happens. Most people might say "you shouldn't let one bad thing ruin a good day" But in my defense, this isn't "one bad thing" this is "one really big horrible not nice one bad thing that has bad breath, a barb-wire ring tatoo and is named Bubba"

A good example would be Three Thursdays ago, the 14th of October. It was a fine day, the sun was shining, I didn't have to wake up and I had actually managed to update my personal website for the first time in just under a year. Not only did I update, but I also took the time to completely redesign it and get it hosted somewhere other than Geocities. I was happy with my accomplishments. So happy, I wanted to share with people. One of these people would be my Girlfriend, who had been such for over two and a half years at that point. Here you can figure out just what would be the "one really big horrible not nice one bad thing.. etc. etc." Yeah. She dumped me. It was to say the least, not fun. Okay, thats an understatement. It hurt in a way that makes me question if I should dodge the swear filter just to say it "Really ****ing hurt." The mods should be pleased to know even though it did "Really ****ing hurt." I chose not to dodge the swear filter. Huzzah!
It wasn't even with a reason. She just "Didn't feel like it anymore" Like it was a game or something and she just got tired of it. I know I should respect her decisions and all, but the way she said it.. I could have really benefitted from knowledge on just what she thought it was and wasn't in times previous to that Thursday.

As such, the way I had been living for two and a half years, happily and content with the one I loved was completely destroyed on a Thursday in which I thought nothing could go wrong.

Little did I know, that it was not the last I would hear of the wrath of Thursdays. It had only just begun.

A Thursday passes. Said Thursday was spent inside, isolated from the rest of the world trying to escape further rather of Thursdays. As such, no wrath came. Unfortunately I realized that I can't just completely shut out the entire world every Thursday. It was a fine plan though, and it would have worked if it weren't for those meddling kids and their pesky dog, Scooby Doo!
Yes. That is exactly what happened. I was trying to avoid the wrath of Thursdays. I was in no way spending the entire week cooped up inside my room, moping about how I got dumped. In no way AT ALL. NO QUESTIONS.

So then. I'm not exactly a professional at counting Thursdays, but I'm pretty sure this brings us to the past Thursday. Which was October 28th if I'm not mistaken.
Again, a very pleasant day.

I spent the morning hanging out with two fine ladies, who did at least help me get over my loss a bit (No, they weren't hookers and no there was no sexual-activity involved, but that isn't to say there wasn't talk of it <!--emo&;)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/wink-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wink-fix.gif' /><!--endemo--> ). The conversation varied.. a lot. From Morgues to the removal of my shirt. But, it was interesting and interesting is good. It was a good morning. A good morning that actually lasted till about 1:40 in the afternoon, but who keeps track of time anyway?

Anyways. The morning was good. Very good. I am pleased with myself. I, a person who have trouble meeting new people managed to meet two new people and spend a good few hours hanging out with them without getting scared and running away like a little pansy girl. I decide to go tell my best friend, who I've known for 3 years and was at the time the only person to talk to considering I was really only down to her and my girlfriend on the "people I talk to" list and.. Well, if you've kept up with the story you might know why I don't exactly want to talk to what I guess the proper term for would be my "ex".

Now then, I am talking to my friend, my best friend, my female best friend. There is no questioning that this friend is not my best friend, nor questioning that she is female. She is both a good friend and female. Good.
I was talking to her about my day and how awesome and good it was an how I had managed to avoid the wrath of Thursdays all day... Until the conversation took a bit of an expected, yet unexpected turn for the worst. Actually, to be honest it took a turn for the sexy. I am a guy. Some people say guys think of sex every 6 seconds. I personally do not find myself thinking of sex every 6 seconds, though I have noticed I seem to talk about it every second conversation, so I guess that balances it out. The way I saw it, my friend started to come on to me. Like.. a fair bit. Before I met my "Ex", I had a major crush on this friend, but she was taken.. So that just wouldn't work out. Things don't seem to do that. So, the fact that she was coming on to me was by no means something I didn't welcome.

Now, I'm a geek. Such is proven by the fact I'm making this post. So when girls come on to me, I really have to question as to why. Its just not.. normal. So I do. She said she really felt that way, and being my best friend, I kinda had to trust her. I'd really not think of her as my best friend if I didn't trust her, right?
So, after enough "Are you sure this isn't just a joke?" questions and more than enough "YES" answers, I figure its time to just savor the moment. Be glad things are going well for once.
Unfortunately, things only go well once a day on Thursday. That had already been done earlier that Thursday. Things were about to go not well. And they did.
It ends up she didn't actually feel that way about me. I was just "assuming things" and I shouldn't have been. Yes. Because you know, asking 10 times if they are joking or telling the truth and getting the same answer to the questions each time they were asked means I'm assuming things. In short, I was rejected.
This was an odd, odd feeling. Not only was I being rejected by my best friend, but I was being rejected by someone who was coming on to me. How does one get rejected like that? It was the Wrath of Thursdays.
Alright, I do realize this bad event wasn't exactly as bad as my previous bad event, but considering that I had feelings for her, that she knew about I might add and I had been more or less recently dumped... Being pulled along and then rejected by someone I consider my best friend wasn't exactly what I needed.

An odd note not so much related to the subject, but just a really spooky type of thing, my friend and I were both in long distance relationships. Very long distance. We both went to see our "other halves" in August. My friend left roughly a week and a half after I did. She was dumped, roughly a week and a half after I was. Conspiracy? Crazier people might say yes. The same people who think the G-man is out to get them. Luckily I know better. Its Dr. Breen that is out to get me. Not the G-man.

Yes. I realize this was only two Tuesdays and it doesn't really count as a curse or anything I just wanted to get it out of my system. I hope this post has been as mildly entertaining to read as it was to write. I hope I can at least score some extra points for the quote used for the title.. If anyone even gets that

Last but not least, Apologies.
One to our most/least favorite resident map critic, Thursday-! This post was in no way directed at you, the fact your alias is Thursday has nothing to do with the horrible coincidences in my life that spawn from Thursdays. Though, it is a coincidence, it isn't exactly a horrible one..
And another apology to who ever actually reads all of this.
And a third apology to my own free time. There are better things I could have done with it than write this post, though I'm not sure what those things are.

Comments

  • Cold_NiTeCold_NiTe Join Date: 2003-09-15 Member: 20875Members
    Looks like you are gonna have to just pick up and move on. In situations like these, turning back and looking over them again and again will do you no good and the safest bet is to simply sit down a focus. What is the root of your problem? Weak social endeavours? The best thing you can do for yourself is work at that, and meet people and such. That is, if you have a problem with it. Not everyone has to be an extrovert to survive, however if you feel the need to have people in your life to share your burdens with, then you may need to become one. I say this; Prioritize, and find what you can do with what you have.

    In any case good luck. And it was an entertaining post, even if it was at your expense.

    Yes I said the word "extrovert" that is not an invitiation for Geminosity to come in and bash my introvert-ed-ness.
  • DiscoZombieDiscoZombie Join Date: 2003-08-05 Member: 18951Members
    we need more details if we are to decode what's going on in your friend's head... but my best guess is that she has feelings for you but she's really nervous about it and doesn't want to go too fast or something? so I don't know what you tried to do that she rejected, but whatever it is, do something more platonic instead =P like, if she rejected a kiss, just talk/take her out to dinner instead for now... and kiss in another date or two...
  • CyndaneCyndane Join Date: 2003-11-15 Member: 22913Members
    I love the quote. :-)

    Anyway on to more fun topics.

    I an sympathize with the fact you have had a rough time on Thursdays, my day seems to be Sunday. Although I suppose I could argue that all days start out that way for me. As soon as something really good happens, something equally if not worse occurs that negates or close regulates that good item. <!--emo&???--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/confused-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='confused-fix.gif' /><!--endemo-->

    Ahh well, look at the bright side, at least it will all be over soon? :-) (After all nothing can change the fact Thursdays are only 23 hours and 59.78 seconds long)
  • Nil_IQNil_IQ Join Date: 2003-04-15 Member: 15520Members
    I'm sure there is a scientific proof somewhere that says bad things always happen on tuesdays and thursdays. They've ALWAYS been the most horrible days of the week for me since forever.
  • TheDestroyerTheDestroyer Tooobah Join Date: 2003-07-12 Member: 18123Members, Constellation
    What is your karma roll?

    No joke. A group of friends and I do karma rolls when we have to do things important and stuff. You need a 100 sided die, or some way to get numbers 1 to 100. Now, I forget what each number does, but if you are serious about trying this, I can find try and get the rules for karma roles in real life.
  • ANeMANeM Join Date: 2003-05-13 Member: 16267Members, Constellation
    Wow.. I'm kinda surprised I actually got any replies.. let alone 5. I don't often get more than 2 or 3.. and those are usually just "Hey! Something awesome! Talk about this awesome thing" type threads.. I mean, how hard is it to reply to one of those? =/

    I'm glad I managed to entertain someone, If I had all that much trouble entertaining at my own expense, I probably wouldn't have tried to make an entertaining post. =P
    I do have to be a bit more of an extrovert to be honest.. I faired well with only two people to really talk to, but now that its cut itself down to one, yeah.. It is probably time to extrovert just slightly.. If that sentance even makes any sense..

    Disco, I really wish I could do something more platonic than nothing, it becomes kinda hard. I'm actually wishing I had done something to be rejected so I could do something along those lines.. What happened was more or less along the lines of as the conversation progressed it went from "I have feelings for you" to "Well, there was one time..." to "Well.. I've never really though of you like that outside of that one time". I am not sure what to think.

    I'm quite thankful that Thursdays are only a few short hours and I'm very glad someone got the quote <!--emo&:D--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/biggrin-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin-fix.gif' /><!--endemo-->

    As for you Destroyer.. As interesting as that sounds, I don't feel I'll look into it any time soon =/
  • DiscoZombieDiscoZombie Join Date: 2003-08-05 Member: 18951Members
    ahh, guess I misunderstood =/ but you don't have to give up :> she wouldn't have said it in the first place if there wasn't some chance at all of something happening...

    but yeah, like others have said, I guess don't get your hopes up =/ just be yourself, which has kept her interested as a friend for this long so far...

    I swear, people never want anything if it's easy or if it'll be good for them. she'd probably be really happy with you, but since you wouldn't be very hard for her to get, she's not interested. I think it's some evolutionary thing. someone who's harder to get has to be better, right? and so the most hard to get people are a-holes who don't care about anyone, and they wind up in the highest demand...

    go figure.

    I think finding a balance is usually the answer... people are flighty -- easily scared... if someone you have a crush on tells you they like you, you'd think it would make them feel good to say "OMG I feel the same way, I think about you every second of every day, I write poetry about you," etc etc, but instead I think it scares off a lot of people... and of course you don't want to say, "eww get away from me" either, though the sad truth is that probably gets women more interested in you than actually caring about them. if you act calm and make them feel comfortable, however, is probably the best bet.

    anyway, sorry for ranting in YOUR rant thread ANeM =P you weren't really even asking for advice hehe... I just get so **** when I hear about guys who get screwed over by girls who send mixed signals... a good friend of mine was in the same situation, but for longer <!--emo&:(--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/sad-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='sad-fix.gif' /><!--endemo--> he and this girl were best friends, and yet she'd always flirt with him and lead him on, but whenever he actually brought up the subject of the two of them, she'd deny everything... eventually the only way he could find peace is to cut her out of his life <!--emo&:(--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/sad-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='sad-fix.gif' /><!--endemo-->
  • TyrainTyrain Join Date: 2003-01-03 Member: 11746Members
    Nice reading, bad story... I feel ya man.
  • Cold_NiTeCold_NiTe Join Date: 2003-09-15 Member: 20875Members
    Anem, you are like what, 18? High school is a pretty good opportunity to meet people, situationally. Now the people themselves may be immature bags of decay, but there will be good ones. Don't relent this opportunity. College will also offer you a chance, but now is a good time to work on that skill without any heavy consequences.
  • DY357LXDY357LX Playing since day 1. Still can&#39;t Comm. England Join Date: 2002-10-27 Member: 1651Members, Constellation
    edited November 2004
    Well today = Tuesday. How's today been for you?
    If it's any consolation, you have a very cool writing
    style and it made a lengthy post that bit more interesting
    to read.

    Chin up, move on, good luck!
  • IsamilIsamil Join Date: 2003-11-25 Member: 23552Members, Constellation
    I hate Thursdays...
  • ANeMANeM Join Date: 2003-05-13 Member: 16267Members, Constellation
    Just to right up a quick ending for the second part, as was concluded today...
    She hates me.

    ... Yeah.
  • ANeMANeM Join Date: 2003-05-13 Member: 16267Members, Constellation
    Sorry for the double post. It ends up this week Thursdays came early. Sorry DY357LX, Trying to keep my chin up because it was Tuesday didn't work so well.

    If the last rant was slightly amusing, I am sad to tell you this one probably won't be. Infact, this is probably the actual need for a "whiney emo rant alert"

    I learned some more things about both situations, while managing to make both.. worse.
    I'll start with my ex.. I guess.
    I mentioned it was a long distance relationship. I never mentioned how far. Over a Thousand miles between myself and her. Infact, when I went to see her in August, it was the first time actually seeing her. The relationship, as lame as this sounds, was mostly online. It was really special, seeing her. She was also my first real girlfriend. I had shyed away from relationships prior to being with her not wanting to be hurt. She was also, lame enough as this is, my first kiss. It was really something special. It ment a lot to me being there. It ment a lot to me lying there with her.. holding her tightly.

    She was with someone else. She had been wanting to.. dump me for that long. She wasn't even with him, she just.. had feelings for him. Feeling stronger than the ones for me. She dumped me for him. They aren't even a "couple" yet and she dumped me for him. He already considers me competition...

    For three summers, I longed to be with her. Every night and day. I wanted to be there with her.. I finally get that, and she didn't want to be there with me. She said she let me see her because she didn't want to hurt me. She doesn't know much about not hurting people.

    I know first relationships never end happily.. Even if I did put it off so long, even if it did go on for so long... But the fact that I went so far.. and tried so hard. She didn't even care about me.

    To say the least, its a bit of a sickening feeling. To be completely honest, I've stopped writing 3 times already while writing this post. Twice to cry, once to throw up. Its that sickening of a feeling.

    I always wanted something like that to be special, which is kinda why I put it off. I don't know. I'm old fashioned and a bit of a hopless romantic. I just wanted my first kiss to be special, with someone I love. To find out that she didn't even love me and that I had gone 1000 miles to see her and she was only humoring me.. Yeah.

    Was it a special moment for me? Yes. Was it perfect? No. I didn't really expect it to be some movie type thing, candle lit and lots of red satin or something like that. I'm not crazy. Things like that don't happen. To be completely honest it was curled up with her on a somewhat broken futon (We didn't break it doing anything naughty, and we were wearing clothes).. But it was honestly special.

    I cherished that moment up until a few hours ago.

    I have only once ever written a page in a Diary. I wrote that on the way home from visiting her. I was sad I had to go, but I felt as if things were finally looking up. I said I knew she loved me. I said I knew things would be all right.

    I ripped out that page and burned it.

    She said she can't talk to me anymore. She says it hurts. She can't bare to talk to me as such a complete wreck. I guess the fact I blew up at her when she tried to tell me to just forget all our special moments didn't help either. Now, I'm going to be honest and try to keep this story as non-biased as possible. I got really ****ing made at her. I blew up. Completely and out right. I said some mean things. On the other hand, I was being told that a good number of the special times in our relationship were just lies and that for the ones that weren't lies, I should just forget them. I wasn't happy. The fact she was being so happy after leaving me and already moving on so quickly hurt more.
    This I can only assume is normal. When a relationship is over and your hurting while the other person is happy, you might feel guilty about it, but some part of you wants them to hurt. When they come in and start making you hurt more, some part of you forgets guilt and decided to just ****ing tear at them.
    This of course, isn't always the best idea, just taking a shot at them. Especially if they haven't actually tried to hurt you more. Some times there is a reason for that guilt. Some times the other person, while being happy, is not happy that you are such a wreck and wishes they could do something. Unfortunately they really can't. They wanted out of the relationship, so they left. If they didn't want out, they wouldn't have left.

    Two and a half years and she is over me in two and a half weeks, already beginning to forget me and what we had. **** ><

    As for my best friend and why she hates me..
    Well, thats a bit of a story also. Before I was holding back some information because she is my friend and there are certain things she has told me that, as a friend, I choose to keep to myself.
    So that being considered you guys unfortunately only got half the story last time, and now you'll probably still only get half of this story, and not the half of the other story. Infact, I'm leaving out a major point in the story, but to be honest, a secret like that in which you refuse to tell anyone, even when asking for help on the situation.. It would be hard for it to be anything short of a big point in the story.

    I guess now is a good time to point out I've stopped crying. All that is left is a sickening feeling in the bottom of my stomach as I pace around my room, yelling obsanities. I'd also like to point out this actually happened before my more recent encounter with my ex in which unveiled all those wonderful.. details.

    Anyways, about my friend. I more or less confonted her on what she had done. I wanted an answer. I wanted to know why she had lead me on only to just hurt me like that. I didn't think she was trying to hurt me, but I think I should tell her she had, and get at least some kind of answer.

    The answer I got was not an answer I wanted.
    "What happened, its purely physical attraction" "Sexual feelings. I don't have emotional feelings for you in that way.."

    So, she would get in bed with me, but she wouldn't care about me.
    And she isn't a **** so she wouldn't get in bed with me if she didn't care about me. So she wouldn't get in bed with me. So ... No.

    On Thusday she asked if I had "the same feelings" for her. She asked if I thought she was attractive. I said yes, but also took the time to point out to her that I, possibly completely alone on this outlook, consider emotions when thinking of attraction. I might have no been trying to at the time, but I figured if she thought we were both talking purely physical... That would tip her off to the fact I wasn't. Infact I said a number of things like that through out the conversation. It wasn't till a while later she actually "rejected" me. Huzzah.

    So she got angry because I had made assumptions, and I got angry because when I was talking about emotions she couldn't just pipe up and say "Hey.. its.. not like that" and only lead me on further, even though she knew I had emotional feelings for her and she knew I was talking about them when she only ment physical attraction.

    Eventually I just ask, would she ever even consider me in that way.
    The answer, an answer I get a lot these days was no. "I just want to be friends"
    FUUUUUUUUry.
    I'm really getting tired of that. Maybe its just me. Maye I don't make the move quick enough.. I'm going to be quite honest in saying this is why I shyed away from relationships for so long. I didn't want to try to be with someone didn't really know first and once I got to know someone and then tried, they just wanted to be friends.
    I'm sick of it.

    In this case though, I really had no chance. None. She would have never said yes even if I had tried before we became good friends. That was something I was sure to ask also.
    "You're right, I wouldn't. I draw lines."
    Ouch.
    So. I had no chance then, and no chance now. The point of not saying that when I first confessed I had feelings for her was...?
    And the point of not saying that when she came on to me was...?
    Yeah.
    I got more angry. This was just stupid.

    I blew up...


    and I'm pretty sure after that she really just doesn't want to talk to me anymore ><
  • marcemarce Join Date: 2004-08-24 Member: 30869Members
    I reckon this should be chalked up as a learning experience. My only advice is to ride it out and hope you are a better person for your suffering.

    Some people say "don't dwell, just quickly get on with your life, forget her, forget the whole thing". I say "Bull". I agree with the first part, don't dwell too long, but then again I reckon the way you are going about it so far is a great way to right yourself when soemthing emotionally traumatising happens. Cry, vomit, swear like there's no tomorrow. I've never been able to cry more than a day about something. There aren't enough tears in you for it. Cry the whole thing out, nobody can cry forever. Eventually the tears stop themselves and you resolve yourself naturally. Sit and cry for as long as it takes until you can't cry without really trying, then take a shower and collapse into bed.

    Then wake up in the middle of the night and scream "VARUS! GIVE ME BACK MY EAGLES!" If it was good enough for Augustus, it's good enough for you. Try it now.

    <!--QuoteBegin-ANeM+--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (ANeM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->VARUS! GIVE ME BACK MY EAGLES!<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->

    see? Wasn't that good?
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