How to reach over 1 million people

killkrazykillkrazy Join Date: 2007-09-10 Member: 62238Members
<div class="IPBDescription">in less than a week. guaranteed.</div>Hi, My name's Simon Goellner, and I have a sure-fire, guaranteed totally legal and free way to reach over 1 million people in less than one week.
here's how:

1) Write a short script with your marketing spiel
2) Gather promotional images and screens
3) get a camcorder
4) get a hot chick to read the script
5) edit in the screenies
6) post the hot chick's video on YouTube.com with the name "hot sexy girl talks about natural selection two"
7) Revel in the horny teenager's willingness to watch, ramp the ratings up, and get it on the front page of YouTube.com in less than a day.

I am. a. genius.

Comments

  • SamRSamR Join Date: 2002-09-30 Member: 1382Members
    Or maybe a series of videos on video network sites demonstrating NS2, posted every month / fortnight coming up to the release of NS2. It would gather gradual and steady interest + hype. These video links and files could all be sent to various gaming websites, that will probably be willing to post news items, blogs etc.
  • badmoonbadmoon Join Date: 2002-11-05 Member: 7212Members, Reinforced - Shadow
    As long as you don't skip step 4. That's the one that's going to matter.
  • DooGieDooGie Join Date: 2005-01-10 Member: 34531Members, Constellation
    I can dress up myself to look like a girl, I'm really hot =D. Let's see if we can get Paris Hilton to do it.
  • MasterPTGMasterPTG Join Date: 2006-11-30 Member: 58780Members
    LOL!!! Now that's an idea (ie, the Paris Hilton idea). LOL!!!
  • the_x5the_x5 the Xzianthian Join Date: 2004-03-02 Member: 27041Members, Constellation
    I know one girl who plays NS who might agree to do this already...
  • killkrazykillkrazy Join Date: 2007-09-10 Member: 62238Members
    I think i meant this as a joke, X5, don't offend someone by asking them to do such a degrading act <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/tounge.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":p" border="0" alt="tounge.gif" />
  • AngeluszAngelusz Harmonic entropist Join Date: 2003-07-10 Member: 18072Members, Forum Moderators, Constellation, NS2 Playtester
    Thing is, it probably <b>would</b> work.
  • NEX9NEX9 Join Date: 2005-03-08 Member: 44299Members
    edited September 2007
    A none digital recplica of Private Nancy, in her tsa underwear needs to be the exsact center frame.
    Honoustly why hasnt this made it into merchandice yet. white boob tube with TSA writen on it.

    <a href="http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/index.php?act=attach&type=post&id=35713" target="_blank">large nancy image</a>
    <img src="http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/uploads//monthly_08_2007/post-25012-1188304418_thumb.jpg" border="0" class="linked-image" />
  • AngeluszAngelusz Harmonic entropist Join Date: 2003-07-10 Member: 18072Members, Forum Moderators, Constellation, NS2 Playtester
    Tee hee! That model actually looks <b>great</b>! Surely something Flay could advertise with.
  • CanadianWolverineCanadianWolverine Join Date: 2003-02-07 Member: 13249Members
    edited September 2007
    <!--quoteo(post=1650690:date=Sep 20 2007, 07:37 AM:name=Angelusz)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Angelusz @ Sep 20 2007, 07:37 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=1650690"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Tee hee! That model actually looks <b>great</b>! Surely something Flay could advertise with.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->

    I know this would work to garner attention but I would be concerned it would send the wrong message about NS2.

    Here is a suggestion, get a smoking hot guy to read it with her too. Plus, if they are not dressed for the harsh realities of facing the Kharaa, have them joke about the Commander needing to drop them some decent equipment and conduct some more research into armor...

    <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/wink-fix.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=";)" border="0" alt="wink-fix.gif" />

    And for the record, that picture above is smoking hot! But consider this: the female concept pictures are far more warrior woman than that!
  • franticfrantic Join Date: 2007-02-05 Member: 59886Members
    edited September 2007
    Cannadian wolvie you had it !!!!
    Expand that Idea and Do exactly that use a lara croft body with the female head above in the ns2 top logo and an arnie scwarzaneger body /shaved gordon head both in their undies saying just that "we need some armour would the bloody commander wake up!" have a few skulks closeing in on them and at the last miniute have him equiped with heavy armour machine gun and her with JP and a shoty.A quick picture/15-20 sec film of them blasting alien skulks with a few dead skulks around them ,close the clip with a fade blinking towars her and an onos rumbling towards him! Post this short on Utube and you will get not only internet coverage but if packaged right maybe some free tv-news time as well!
  • JaneJane Seriously&#33;? Join Date: 2003-07-01 Member: 17835Members, Constellation
    actually interesting / catchy u-tube clips would really help for promotion ... then in the comments people could post the forums / site info .. and comments about NS .. and what NS 2 will be like
  • spellman23spellman23 NS1 Theorycraft Expert Join Date: 2007-05-17 Member: 60920Members
    I like it so far.

    Best method I've seen, though, is personal advertisement. Lots of hype among your friends and stuff.

    Either that or the video has to be really good quality. Not some simple thing, I'm thinking NS1 original CGI elements plus NS3.0 cinematography stuff. See Insurgency promo video (http://youtube.com/watch?v=-fTCO7ZE-uE)
  • HarimauHarimau Join Date: 2007-12-24 Member: 63250Members
    gahahahaha. I like all the ideas that have a girl in them. I seriously think they'd <b>work.</b>
  • DrfuzzyDrfuzzy FEW... MORE.... INCHES... Join Date: 2003-09-21 Member: 21094Members
    <!--quoteo(post=1650678:date=Sep 20 2007, 06:59 AM:name=NEX9)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(NEX9 @ Sep 20 2007, 06:59 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=1650678"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->A none digital recplica of Private Nancy, in her tsa underwear needs to be the exsact center frame.
    Honoustly why hasnt this made it into merchandice yet. white boob tube with TSA writen on it.

    <a href="http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/index.php?act=attach&type=post&id=35713" target="_blank">large nancy image</a>
    <img src="http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/uploads//monthly_08_2007/post-25012-1188304418_thumb.jpg" border="0" class="linked-image" /><!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
    aww, i miss sheena <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/sad-fix.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":(" border="0" alt="sad-fix.gif" />
  • OnozkiOnozki Join Date: 2005-04-20 Member: 48948Members, Reinforced - Supporter
    Haha, this might actually work <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/biggrin-fix.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid=":D" border="0" alt="biggrin-fix.gif" />

    That model really IS hot <img src="style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/nerd-fix.gif" style="vertical-align:middle" emoid="::nerdy::" border="0" alt="nerd-fix.gif" />
  • schkorpioschkorpio I can mspaint Join Date: 2003-05-23 Member: 16635Members
    how about instead of soft porn how about a female TSA marine? in armour and all
  • ThaldarinThaldarin Alonzi&#33; Join Date: 2003-07-15 Member: 18173Members, Constellation
    edited March 2008
    I am. <b>Asking for another ban.</b> Oh wait, I just got one. --Comprox
  • HarimauHarimau Join Date: 2007-12-24 Member: 63250Members
    edited March 2008
    Wtf? Why even bother doing that?

    Schkorpio: That defeats the purpose. Besides, we already have a female marine in full armour, and she's not much of a 'hook'.
  • schkorpioschkorpio I can mspaint Join Date: 2003-05-23 Member: 16635Members
    i just think that using 1/2 naked women (or men) to advertising anything is lame. And it attracts the wrong type of people for the wrong reasons.
    People should be looking at NS because they want to play a fun game, not so they can partially satisfy their perversions.
  • friggestfriggest Join Date: 2008-02-04 Member: 63578Members
    edited March 2008
    <!--quoteo(post=1650332:date=Sep 18 2007, 03:15 PM:name=SamR)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(SamR @ Sep 18 2007, 03:15 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=1650332"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Or maybe a series of videos on video network sites demonstrating NS2, posted every month / fortnight coming up to the release of NS2. It would gather gradual and steady interest + hype. These video links and files could all be sent to various gaming websites, that will probably be willing to post news items, blogs etc.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->


    You ideas are to spacey for this world.
  • HarimauHarimau Join Date: 2007-12-24 Member: 63250Members
    edited March 2008
    <!--quoteo(post=1671957:date=Mar 3 2008, 04:24 PM:name=schkorpio)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(schkorpio @ Mar 3 2008, 04:24 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=1671957"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->i just think that using 1/2 naked women (or men) to advertising anything is lame. And it attracts the wrong type of people for the wrong reasons.
    People <b>should be</b> looking at NS because they want to play a fun game, not so they can partially satisfy their perversions.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
    Should be.

    That's hardly usually the case though. I thought Rag Doll Kung Fu was a great game. And check out the sheer number of players in that community!

    It's not necessarily about making NS sexy, it's about giving it publicity. And isn't that what the E-Team is for?

    *shrug* But I suppose it does give a misleading impression of NS. 'Cause they might feel gypped when they play the actual game.

    Still, I have no problem with that. The only real objection one might have to this idea is that it's morally unacceptable.
  • CrispyCrispy Jaded GD Join Date: 2004-08-22 Member: 30793Members, Constellation
    <!--quoteo(post=1671948:date=Mar 3 2008, 02:50 AM:name=Harimau)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Harimau @ Mar 3 2008, 02:50 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=1671948"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Wtf? Why even bother doing that?

    Schkorpio: That defeats the purpose. Besides, we already have a female marine in full armour, and she's not much of a 'hook'.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->Pirate space marines? It's <i>perfect</i>!
  • INKEDOUTINKEDOUT Join Date: 2007-06-23 Member: 61343Members
    I think the guy and the girl in their underwear just talking about how NS2 is a brilliant idea! They don't have to be in the game, they just have to look good! Over the chat they could be shouting for clothing, and then right at the end some would drop down from above them. This could be the teaser. Eventually when game fotage comes out you could cut it in at the end or do another one with the girl talking about how she cant wait to play NS2.

    It could go something like this:

    blank gray background

    Guy walks on in his underwear

    Guy: "Ummm... I don't know if I am compleastly comfortable with this commander..."

    the camera wables and refocuses a bit

    Guy: "I mean I know the game is still in development, but this is just stupid...

    You could at least give me something to wear!"

    From off camera: Girl: "I'm not coming out! Have you seen what they have put us in? Or NOT put us in..."

    Guy: "Don't worry, it's fine! No one will see this"

    Girl: "Apart from you... ...this thing hardly covers anything"

    Guy: "I promiss I wont look!"

    Guy grins slightly and puts his hands over his eyes

    Girl: "You promiss?"

    Guy: "Yeah... I promiss"

    Girl walks into shot in just here underwear.

    Girl: "Hmmmm... I'm not happy about this commander..."

    Guy peeks through his fingers.

    Guy: "Hello... ...No one told me they remodeled you."

    Girl: "Hey you promissed"

    Guy: "...ah the commander can see you anyway..."

    Girl: "Huh!"

    Girl tries to cover herself up

    Guy: "...well he could if he was watching us. But he clearly isn't, otherwise he would HAVE DROPED US SOME FREAKIN CLOTHING!"

    Girl: "Oh ok... ...What is this place. It's just grey, they haven't even got a map to put us in yet?"

    Guy: "Yeah! Talk about still in development."

    Girl: "Oh I remember now... They are going to ask the Natural Selection community to design the maps."

    Guy: "Are they asking them to design our clothes as well?"

    Girl: "ummm... don't think so..."

    Guy: "Must just be our lame commander then! HELLO! CAN I GET MY BASIC ISSUE KIT PLEASE!"

    Girl: "Yeah! Give us something to wear!"

    They both shout and wave their hands in the air while looking upwards, trying to get the commders atention.

    Then from behind the camera: skulk running and, Skulk: #Snarl#

    Guy: "Uh oh!"

    Girl: "Oh s**t why dont they warn us about these things!"

    Guy: "Commander!"

    Then all around the guy and the girl appear weapons and medpacks and clothes.

    The girl picks up a HMG and starts firing as the camera gets knocked over and the screen goes black.

    Tag line appears on screen:

    Be Prepared For The Unknown
    Join The TSA

    Fade to black again

    Natural Selection 2

    www.unknownworlds.com

    ----------------------------

    What do you think? It needs some work. It wouldn’t be serious at all, more comedy than “this is what the game will be like”. Kinda like those HL2 sketches that were going around a while back.

    We need a guy and a girl to do the voice acting before we can really do anything. Doesn’t matter where they are as long as they can get a good recording. If someone does it, do each person as a separate recording. Post demos on here and then we can get the high quality version in an email if this project gets off the ground.

    Someone would have to make the models and do the animation, this could probably be done in the source SDK right?

    Other than that and the sound effects it really doesn’t seem like a massive job. The hardest thing to do is find the voice actors and someone willing to do all the animation and do it well.

    I can do any video editing, I work with Final Cut Pro all the time.

    Is anyone up for this little job?
  • PsympleJesterPsympleJester Join Date: 2008-04-06 Member: 64024Members
    edited April 2008
    <!--quoteo(post=1675726:date=Apr 13 2008, 10:10 PM:name=INKEDOUT)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(INKEDOUT @ Apr 13 2008, 10:10 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=1675726"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->It could go something like this:

    blank gray background

    *Guy walks on in his underwear*

    Guy: "Ummm... I don't know if I am compleastly comfortable with this commander..."

    *the camera wables and refocuses a bit*

    Guy: "I mean I know the game is still in development, but this is just stupid... You could at least give me something to wear!"

    {From off camera}: Girl: "I'm not coming out! Have you seen what they have put us in? Or NOT put us in..."

    Guy: "Don't worry, it's fine! No one will see this"

    Girl: "Apart from you... ...this thing hardly covers anything"

    Guy: "I promiss I wont look!"

    *Guy grins slightly and puts his hands over his eyes*

    Girl: "You promiss?"

    Guy: "Yeah... I promiss"

    *Girl walks into shot in just here underwear.*

    Girl: "Hmmmm... I'm not happy about this commander..."

    *Guy peeks through his fingers.*

    Guy: "Hello... ...No one told me they remodeled you."

    Girl: "Hey you promissed"

    Guy: "...ah the commander can see you anyway..."

    Girl: "Huh!"

    *Girl tries to cover herself up*

    Guy: "...well he could if he was watching us. But he clearly isn't, otherwise he would HAVE DROPED US SOME FREAKIN CLOTHING!"

    Girl: "Oh ok... ...What is this place. It's just grey, they haven't even got a map to put us in yet?"

    Guy: "Yeah! Talk about still in development."

    Girl: "Oh I remember now... They are going to ask the Natural Selection community to design the maps."

    Guy: "Are they asking them to design our clothes as well?"

    Girl: "ummm... don't think so..."

    Guy: "Must just be our lame commander then! HELLO! CAN I GET MY BASIC ISSUE KIT PLEASE!"

    Girl: "Yeah! Give us something to wear!"<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->

    I would cut if off here and make a sequal, Trying to fit in the Aliens right at the end would make it look rushed and wouldnt work if the marines did not yet have any kit becasue having them run away from the skulks would be demeaning to the game.

    How ever this is exactly the same script and stage directions I thought of after reading the other comments!!! I think all the bit i have quoted is PERFECT! It would be amazing to see it made into an actual short video on YouTube.

    However I stand firm that Aliens should not be rushed in at the end and it should not be elongated for the following reasons:
    1) Numbers of Short teasers are better than a single Long one.
    2) It would seem rushed.

    An alternative solution to putting Aliens in at the end would be to add in an Alien giggling at the end as it goes black. As well as this you could make a 2nd episode in which the aliens are featured in greater depth.
  • HarimauHarimau Join Date: 2007-12-24 Member: 63250Members
    edited April 2008
    Dunno if I've already said this*, but how about a teaser based mostly in the real world, where some gangly late-teen adolescent is playing NS2 on his PC in his room, and an onos comes crashing through the wall and devours him whole. (Maybe flash the 'devoured' screen from NS1.) Switch to black, fade-in NS2 logo, (and <b>possibly</b> additional information eg. website URL if required) then fade-out. Wouldn't be longer than 15 seconds I think.

    * edit: oh, i have, <a href="http://www.unknownworlds.com/ns2/forums/index.php?showtopic=103061&pid=1669795&st=0&#entry1669795" target="_blank">here</a>
  • the_x5the_x5 the Xzianthian Join Date: 2004-03-02 Member: 27041Members, Constellation
    <!--quoteo(post=1650318:date=Sep 18 2007, 04:24 PM:name=killkrazy)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(killkrazy @ Sep 18 2007, 04:24 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=1650318"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->Hi, My name's Simon Goellner, and I have a sure-fire, guaranteed totally legal and free way to reach over 1 million people in less than one week.
    here's how:

    1) Write a short script with your marketing spiel
    2) Gather promotional images and screens
    3) get a camcorder
    4) get a hot chick to read the script
    5) edit in the screenies
    6) post the hot chick's video on YouTube.com with the name "hot sexy girl talks about natural selection two"
    7) Revel in the horny teenager's willingness to watch, ramp the ratings up, and get it on the front page of YouTube.com in less than a day.

    I am. a. genius.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
    Speaking of which... I would like to take this opportunity to provide <a href="http://www.unknownworlds.com/ns2/forums/index.php?showtopic=103868" target="_blank">a link to this project</a> in case you are reading this and are not aware of it. If you have seen that topic but not recently, you should take a look at how far it has progressed. (even with green-screening now!)
  • HarimauHarimau Join Date: 2007-12-24 Member: 63250Members
    I thought he actually replied to the thread prior to yesterday.
  • the_x5the_x5 the Xzianthian Join Date: 2004-03-02 Member: 27041Members, Constellation
    Yeah I guess so. I just wanted to help provide a link from this topic to a related on for readers who weren't aware of it.
  • BlackHawkBlackHawk Join Date: 2008-06-17 Member: 64467Members
    <!--quoteo(post=1675726:date=Apr 13 2008, 04:10 PM:name=INKEDOUT)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(INKEDOUT @ Apr 13 2008, 04:10 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=1675726"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->I think the guy and the girl in their underwear just talking about how NS2 is a brilliant idea! They don't have to be in the game, they just have to look good! Over the chat they could be shouting for clothing, and then right at the end some would drop down from above them. This could be the teaser. Eventually when game fotage comes out you could cut it in at the end or do another one with the girl talking about how she cant wait to play NS2.

    It could go something like this:

    blank gray background

    Guy walks on in his underwear

    Guy: "Ummm... I don't know if I am compleastly comfortable with this commander..."

    the camera wables and refocuses a bit

    Guy: "I mean I know the game is still in development, but this is just stupid...

    You could at least give me something to wear!"

    From off camera: Girl: "I'm not coming out! Have you seen what they have put us in? Or NOT put us in..."

    Guy: "Don't worry, it's fine! No one will see this"

    Girl: "Apart from you... ...this thing hardly covers anything"

    Guy: "I promiss I wont look!"

    Guy grins slightly and puts his hands over his eyes

    Girl: "You promiss?"

    Guy: "Yeah... I promiss"

    Girl walks into shot in just here underwear.

    Girl: "Hmmmm... I'm not happy about this commander..."

    Guy peeks through his fingers.

    Guy: "Hello... ...No one told me they remodeled you."

    Girl: "Hey you promissed"

    Guy: "...ah the commander can see you anyway..."

    Girl: "Huh!"

    Girl tries to cover herself up

    Guy: "...well he could if he was watching us. But he clearly isn't, otherwise he would HAVE DROPED US SOME FREAKIN CLOTHING!"

    Girl: "Oh ok... ...What is this place. It's just grey, they haven't even got a map to put us in yet?"

    Guy: "Yeah! Talk about still in development."

    Girl: "Oh I remember now... They are going to ask the Natural Selection community to design the maps."

    Guy: "Are they asking them to design our clothes as well?"

    Girl: "ummm... don't think so..."

    Guy: "Must just be our lame commander then! HELLO! CAN I GET MY BASIC ISSUE KIT PLEASE!"

    Girl: "Yeah! Give us something to wear!"

    They both shout and wave their hands in the air while looking upwards, trying to get the commders atention.

    Then from behind the camera: skulk running and, Skulk: #Snarl#

    Guy: "Uh oh!"

    Girl: "Oh s**t why dont they warn us about these things!"

    Guy: "Commander!"

    Then all around the guy and the girl appear weapons and medpacks and clothes.

    The girl picks up a HMG and starts firing as the camera gets knocked over and the screen goes black.

    Tag line appears on screen:

    Be Prepared For The Unknown
    Join The TSA

    Fade to black again

    Natural Selection 2

    www.unknownworlds.com

    ----------------------------<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->

    I Think this is good and if this was on youtube i would rate it 4 1/2 stars (I don't rate stuff 5 stars unless its like OMG that was AWESOME!!! and that dosen't happen to often. I do agree though that the skulk is being rushed so you should just have it growl and have them go "O S--t" and then do one with aliens.
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