Grey's Road Guide
<div class="IPBDescription">Follow it!</div> I have seen a sudden increase in these activities in a few days. I will list them. (This is a sarcasm post, dont follow them....PLEASE dont follow them!)
#1. You may park anywhere. Even if the sign above you says, "Do not park here" It says in your mind, "Do not park here (Except now)"
#2. Railroads have officially become hill billy stunt ramps.
#3. STOP!! HERE and accelerate your supercharged Honda Civic, thus waking the entire neighborehood because you decided to drive down a residential community at 3 in the f'ing morning!.
#4. Speed bumps ahead! GUDGES WILL BE SCORING!!
#5. Left lane ends! You must swerve into the right lane NOW!!
#6. Speed limit 70, truck speed limit 90. KILL KILL KILL!!
#7. LEFT LANE ENDS. Go ahead, pull your huge SUV in at the last milisecond, everyone is ok with it!
#8. STOPtional.
#9. Since you have had your obligatory 2 children, and have bought an SUV or Minivan, traffic rules no longer apply to you.
#10. STOP!! Drive up to this thing REALLY quick and lock your brakes!!
#11. Continue driving recklessly at 70 mph, those guys in the orange jumpsuits are holograms.
#12. Motocyclests are your ENEMY!! They drive the confangled devil-created monstosities on two wheels!! You must beep/tailgate/drive close to them/pummel them with shockwaves from your riced up car at all costs to stop them!!! [COLOR=red]KILL KILL KILL[COLOR=gray]. (I have a motercycle, seems every driver ever wants to destroy me.)
#1. You may park anywhere. Even if the sign above you says, "Do not park here" It says in your mind, "Do not park here (Except now)"
#2. Railroads have officially become hill billy stunt ramps.
#3. STOP!! HERE and accelerate your supercharged Honda Civic, thus waking the entire neighborehood because you decided to drive down a residential community at 3 in the f'ing morning!.
#4. Speed bumps ahead! GUDGES WILL BE SCORING!!
#5. Left lane ends! You must swerve into the right lane NOW!!
#6. Speed limit 70, truck speed limit 90. KILL KILL KILL!!
#7. LEFT LANE ENDS. Go ahead, pull your huge SUV in at the last milisecond, everyone is ok with it!
#8. STOPtional.
#9. Since you have had your obligatory 2 children, and have bought an SUV or Minivan, traffic rules no longer apply to you.
#10. STOP!! Drive up to this thing REALLY quick and lock your brakes!!
#11. Continue driving recklessly at 70 mph, those guys in the orange jumpsuits are holograms.
#12. Motocyclests are your ENEMY!! They drive the confangled devil-created monstosities on two wheels!! You must beep/tailgate/drive close to them/pummel them with shockwaves from your riced up car at all costs to stop them!!! [COLOR=red]KILL KILL KILL[COLOR=gray]. (I have a motercycle, seems every driver ever wants to destroy me.)
Comments
You think you have it bad, have you tried riding a <i>regular</i> bike? Then you get psycho motorists who are utterly convinced that the cycle-path is merely an extension of the road, and bicycles have to right to be there at all.
But you also have pedestrians who like to suddenly swerve when they see you coming (as if you are really going to plow right into them. STAND STILL for f**ks sake, then I can go around you!). That, or they are walking down one side of a path, and they have a dog on a lead walking down the other side, the result of which is that the lead is stretched across the entire path so that I can't pass.
Also, motorcyclists like going past you really fast (and really close) to show off that they can go faster than you. Big wow.
Tis hard for a cyclist!
This is too funny. Did you make this yourself? Believe me, I am going to share this on the national motorist forums, they'll love it.
EDIT: I love telling people that stops signs with white lines around it means they are only optional! Girls are fooled by it the most.
Tis hard learning to drive.
I driving down a street and went around a bend. I noticed a pedestrian crossing the road but I didn't slow down because I knew he would make it across in time. But no....
He stops in the middle of the road and waits for me to run him over.
Tis hard learning to drive.
I driving down a street and went around a bend. I noticed a pedestrian crossing the road but I didn't slow down because I knew he would make it across in time. But no....
He stops in the middle of the road and waits for me to run him over. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
lol gg hitting a pedestrian...
ALWAYS slow down, some people let themselves get hit just to get money...
...
<a href='http://www.somethingawful.com/articles.php?a=1443' target='_blank'>The aforementioned Something Awful article</a>.
You think you have it bad, have you tried riding a <i>regular</i> bike? Then you get psycho motorists who are utterly convinced that the cycle-path is merely an extension of the road, and bicycles have to right to be there at all.
But you also have pedestrians who like to suddenly swerve when they see you coming (as if you are really going to plow right into them. STAND STILL for f**ks sake, then I can go around you!). That, or they are walking down one side of a path, and they have a dog on a lead walking down the other side, the result of which is that the lead is stretched across the entire path so that I can't pass.
Also, motorcyclists like going past you really fast (and really close) to show off that they can go faster than you. Big wow.
Tis hard for a cyclist! <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
i regularly overtake cars, suvs and buses on my way to college on my bike.
such a feeling of power as thier extremely lowered souped up honda civic/ford escort/Golf is reduced to 10 mph so they dont rip thier body work off on the speed bumps, whereas i can cruise past them at an speedy 20mph. once i overtook 4 cars and a bus in about 100 yards.
the look on their faces is priceless. sometimes i taunt them by sitting right in their off-side mirror beofre zooming past them. its is especially satisfying if they have just cut me up
me > all of them <!--emo&:D--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'><!--endemo-->
<!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
We need more cyclists like you. Most of the ones I've encountered whiel driving just drift along at about 5 mph, swerving drunkenly in and out of the bike lane so I won't be able to pass them without either hitting them or swerving into oncoming traffic.
...
<a href='http://www.somethingawful.com/articles.php?a=1443' target='_blank'>The aforementioned Something Awful article</a>. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
ripped of humor sucks :S