Need Some Serious Constructive Criticism

Mendasp

<b>Updated, check the second page</b>

I always liked the idea of having a corridor showing a big lake, simulating like that's one of the sources for the water extraction...

So, now, I've finally done it, it's in a separate rmf, so that's why you see that black end in the corridor.

I'm not pretty satisfied with it, so that's why I ask you for some CONSTRUCTIVE criticism <!--emo&;)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/wink.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wink.gif'><!--endemo-->

460 wpoly <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif'><!--endemo-->

Boneless

Nice one... now merge it with ns_phobia <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif'><!--endemo-->

Darkhound

Maybe you could increase the texture scale on the water and rotate it a bit? The tiling is quite noticable right now. The corridor is pretty cool looking though. The assymmetry makes it look unique.

Redford

The hallway looks repeditive and dull. Add some lights, a console, or somthing to make things look more intresting.

Sycophant

I think it already looks really good (although I agree somewhat with Redford that it's a little repetitive). Hmm, maybe if the hallway was curved slightly...?

Mendasp

<!--QuoteBegin--Redford+Apr 14 2003, 09:15 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Redford @ Apr 14 2003, 09:15 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> The hallway looks repeditive and dull. Add some lights, a console, or somthing to make things look more intresting. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
Yeah, I know it's kinda repetitive, so I'll probably spice it up with some machinery, pipes, and... doors, it's TOO long <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif'><!--endemo-->

I'll take into account both suggestions <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif'><!--endemo-->

Nazul

jup , place light in the hallway , and for outside .. maybe something that shows that someone has been there and "mining" ? or a water pump .. i dunno <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif'><!--endemo--> but what the heck , its original , so it's always g00d <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif'><!--endemo-->

Ollj

Thats wonderfull.
Scale the water texture more and make it a tiny bit transparent.
Add any lowpoly func_illsuionary/monster_furniture object outside (vehicle, spacecraft, pumping station).

Sephiroth2k

only problem isthat i wonder where your map takes place. is it on the planet right there? is it hovering above? im not sure.. and also if you really pay attention to the windows, they don't make much sense. i mean i know the whole point of the corridor was to emphasize the building outside, but those windows are quite large and take up a majority of that wall. if you ever look at spaceships in movies and such, the windows don't really take up that much space. excuse me if i'm wrong, but i just wanted to point that out. that planet looks very nice too <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif'><!--endemo-->

Hypergrip

Very nice, but you really should add a crate, a console or anthing else to make it less repetative.
Also i would decrease the light from "outside" a bit and add a few "internal" lights.
Nice Architecture.
Maybe put some "eyecatcher" outside at the water... a wreck of a crashed down fighter.. a pumpingstation with steam or something like that.

Hyper

Battousaix

use that command on the compiler to smooth the walls, dunno how was it called if another one may help me with this one, it will be appreciated....

ill talk about this with you on msn =)

Fantasmo

Just a little "continuity" thing...

If this facility is on an asteroid (I'm assuming by the view) they generally don't have atmospheres and have very low gravity so that pool of liquid probably wouldn't exist outside.

Of course this is serious nitpicking... <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif'><!--endemo-->

JediYoshi

Very nice, but as said, quite repeitive. I suggest making some cover for skulks, or for marines in other cases <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif'><!--endemo-->

blueman

if youve only used 460 polys....then try to make all the exterior func_wall and then add alot more detail into the corridor, you know, wires, columns, computer terminals, anything, and then return. You'll see it will look terrific!

Yamazaki

Some thoughts...

1. Extend the window frame vertical pieces inwards, so they stick into the hallway a bit and break up the flat surface?

2. Have the vertical pieces arch all the way across the hallway, making arch supports?

Wurmspawn

the lighting on the rock doesnt seem very exciting to me. presumably if its being lit by a nearby star, some of those peaks would cast shadows.
yeah, i recommend shadows.
also, if that is the skybox you intend to use, perhaps you could tweak the lights so that the colour on the rocks matched a the sky asteroids.

and as fantasmo said...it would have to be a sizeable planetoid to have gravity enough to hold water, and in that case it would probably freeze and evaporate. it might be more believable with some sprite clouds/fog hanging over it.

Xzilen

May seem as nothing, but I would suggest not making the part after the lake look like outer space, but that may be related to the problem you stated at the start of this thread :_\

Mendasp

*bump* (I don't really like to do this...)

Well, I've done some tweaks here and there, some internal lighting (not final), made the columns look more like columns without killing the r_speeds, rotated and scaled the water texture, and... well, that, I'll continue tweaking it... <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif'><!--endemo-->

BlackPanther

hmmm r_speeds already look fairly high at this point.

Might want to close off this section right now and make it turn so you can start on another section.

Mendasp

<!--QuoteBegin--BlackPanther+Apr 16 2003, 08:41 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (BlackPanther @ Apr 16 2003, 08:41 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> hmmm r_speeds already look fairly high at this point.

Might want to close off this section right now and make it turn so you can start on another section. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
I will probably add doors in the centerpart and make it a T junction, and add some more lights inside the corridor, but yeah, you're right, I <b>MUST</b> finish this now or I'll be with this map ages