Funniest Moments In Ns?

Cronos · June 2003

<div class="IPBDescription">What story do you have to tell?</div> The map was ns_tanith (Waste, Fusion and Satcom hives for those that cant remember map names but can remember hives). It was a small game, about 3 vs 4, and I was playing aliens.

For about ten full minutes, I was busy patrolling routes between the hives without seeing a marine. So, bored with patrol, I decided to rush the marine base. They had a laughable mine defense, they were easily jumped over. In there, I saw two marines humping the armory, they were skulk food. A marine spawned after I'd killed them, I killed him too very efficiently, I wasnt even hurt, still had full health. I then started munching the IP. I soon heard the comm logout and instinctively hid behind the arms lab. Now, the comm comes after me. After playing a bit of hide and go seek with him around the Arms lab, I kill him and finish off the IP. Heres the punch line. The marine comm called me a hacker and left. I was laughing so hard that marine spawned and killed me. Add to the fact that I was mildly intoxicated at the time, that only magnified it's humour value for me.

More recently, I was playing on ns_bast (Feed, Refinery, Engine). The aliens started in feed. A skulk and myself were busily keeping the marines outside of atmos, while the gorge and other players held onto refinery and capped RT's. Anyway, for ten full minutes, we kept the disorganised marine team out of atmos. The gorge hadnt even capped it yet. Then, all of a sudden, out of nowhere...

"Cronos and Coro(?) you ******* campers!"

I'm thinking, wth?

"What are you talking about?" I asked

"FFS camping Atmos you noobs"

"It's called playing defense you idiot, we deny you double res, you cant get jp/hmg, Capiche?"

After a few seconds, I kill the guy again after he rushes out to get atmos

"OMG YOU ****** CAMPER NOOB MOTHE... (you get the idea)"

By this time, the entire server had turned against him, calling him a noob and to go back and play CS. By this time, I've caught him trying to knife the RT in tram maintenance. He sees me, quickly switches weapons and begins to shoot, yet I manage to kill him.

"HACKER!!!!!!"

He screams at me.

"How am I a hacker?" I retort

"FFS HOW DO YOU GET AROUND MY ******* AIMBOT!!!"

An admin was called in and he was swiftly kicked from the server.

So, do you have any funny stories, anecdotes, reccolections to add?

ZERG · June 2003

One time I was owning the aliens hive my really sharp knife and all of a sudden I see 10+ aliens rushing me all at once. i was like DOODS! I'm only 1 guy. <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/nerd.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='nerd.gif'>

DethGaunt · June 2003

I was on one of the custom maps (ns_castlewar) just to see wot they were like and i was lerk and i was flying a gorge around.

this was the first time id ever been on a server with lerk lift on and me and the gorge were experimenting with what we could do. i flew up really high over the marine base and told the gorge to drop some ocs

He dropped one but as soon as he did he was dropped automatically. so this oc and the gorge fell to the marine base and died. the marines were like "OMG Suicide bombing gorges!!"

I couldnt stop laughing at this for hours. (the gorge was seriously mad, telling me i had dropped him on purpose)

eon · June 2003

on the map with cargo, i was with another marine at the rt right outside the marine base and we were covering the hall to cargo. The other marine was hopping side to side, and he hopped right over the little rail and fell into the hole <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'>

I was laughing so hard

i've also seen people do that in generator(on the same map)

and also, one round on the same map(gee, i have a lot of funny stories from this map :\) i was playing alien and i was a skulk at viaduct. This one marine kept coming from cargo and i was protecting it(gorge was saving for hive and couldnt spare the res for ocs). The marine kept jumping down into via from the walkway and kept worldspawning himself. He did it like 3 times in a row.

CplHicks · June 2003

A couple weeks ago I had a slugfest with only me and a fade on ns-nothing.
I dont remember how this room is called, its the one with a deep hole in the middle, a res node in one corner, one exit leading to marine start, the other one to an elevator.

So I was there guarding the node with a shotty (I suck with shotty). then the elevator came up, and I heard the characteristic "shlfp shlafp" of a fade moving.
"Shhii..." So we at each other, he swiping madly, me pumping one shell after the other into the walls around him, and obviously some into him as well.
I was at, like 15 health, then he evaded, moved back and ran to the elevator, jumped down..

"OOOAAAAARR" he jumped to his death ROFL
I was laughing so hard!!!
2 minutes later he came back and killed me with again a fade <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'>

kalikka · June 2003

I and Cruzz once plocked all entrances to Computer Core hive in Eclipse by stacking CCs to them. We had relocated there and kept the fort up for hour or two. After that we still hid in wents for almost an hour. It was fun though aliens maybe didnt like it as much as we did. <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/sad.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='sad.gif'>

It was small game started as 2 vs 2 and grew to 3 vs 3.

lolfighter · June 2003

I like to call this story "That time once when I knifed an Onos", but that is a lie.
Well, the aliens had three hives, and obviously we were losing really fast (don't remember the name of the map, the one with the fusion and sattelite hives, with the welding point that makes lasers blow a hole in a wall). So I spawn in the middle of our rapidly disintegrating base, and since I'm going to die anyway, I don't bother with ammo, I just start shooting. So in comes and Onos, and everybody starts shooting at it with their puny pistols and lmgs. The thing trashes a few structures, then lumbers out again, but me and another guy think "no way!" and rush after the beast, pumping rounds into it. We deplete our lmgs and pistols, then whip out our knives and start swiping the air, still running after the thing. That guy must have thought "hey, <b>I</b> am an Onos, not they! How dare they attempt melee with me? I'll show 'em!", so he turns around and runs towards us. We jump around, frantically knifing away, and he finally dies just before a fade arrives and bileboms us to smithereens! The entire server was rofling, 'cept the poor onos-guy. A notable absense of comments from him. <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif'>
Why is "That time once when I knifed an Onos" a lie? Because the other guy got the killing blow. <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/confused.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='confused.gif'>

PolyMorph · June 2003

I killed an onos with a welder.

Once I was owning the aliens at the begining of a round (which isn't very common for me:( ), I said over the global channel after I killed the 5th skulk "I'm surprised I aren't dead yet." Guess the guy I just killed wasn't too pleased with me saying that as he said something I don't think i should repeat on here.

After I killed a few more skulks I was running low on ammo, so i decided to head back to base for some ammo (damn comm was ignoring me.) What i didn't noticed was the words 'parasite detected' at the bottom of me hud.

I walked past a vent and heard a skulk behind me, i spun round, only to see the ENTIRE alien team coming right at me, I started firing, i got one but had no pistol ammo, so my knife had to do. Surfice to say, I was eaten. <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/sad.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='sad.gif'>

Dirty_Harry_Potter · June 2003

i once killed a fleeing fade - he jumped down the Bast elevator - so did i, taking no damage i quickly stabbed him multiple times in the back <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'>

once as an Alien - back when we were all nubs - i was evovling to an onos, and i had 2 allies protecting me, but they got killed, and the rines discovered me soon and began shooting me, but too late *pop* ONOS!!!!

p4l · June 2003

Last night on Nancy, I was on a goofy marine team that pretty much gave up on playing seriously from the start. Anyways, as I was getting more and more flustered (b/c I think you only get silly *after* you know you've lost hehe) the comm dropped me a JP and an HMG and said I could go fight all the aliens myself if I wanted to.

I guess they had been saving up or something, because I came out to what I thought was their only hive *just* as they had the minerals to get fades. I took 3 of em out in gestation harharhar! Then a skulk hit me and made me look stupid. But I uh let him. Yeah.

Same map, later, I'm dead and our IP's have been down for a good minute or two, and the last remaining hider dropped three CCs in between himself and the world, in a vent (We had a RIDICULOUS amount of minerals because the comm never did anything). I am getting really angry just knowing I'll have to sit for 10 minutes or something because only 1 skulk can get up there at a time... and 3 CCs is alot of chewing. Then this guy techs up to observatory and uses a trick I didn't even know about, the distress beacon. Except he used it in the vent. 7 laughing perma-stuck marines aren't of much use... I don't know if the Kharaa team ever even figured out what we did. They were going to 3rd hive to get exploding skulks hehe.

we just f4'd.

kavasa · June 2003

As the final marine one time, I stayed alive for a good 5-10 minutes or so, constantly moving and hiding in retarded spots. It was ns_nothing, and the bit that really got the whole marine team giggling had me hiding in the little canal-area-thing, right next to the miasma RT. Fades and onii kept walking by me a good foot away. They even stopped there at one point, a group of three, looking at each other and discussing the issue in voicecomm I guess. Then they all split up and left again. It was like a cartoon.

Jasp · June 2003

He used distress in a vent so the marines spawned in a vent that cant be right marines always spawn with distress on the map start i thought?

Eviscerator · June 2003

</span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Jasp @ Jun 20 2003, 04:03 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> He used distress in a vent so the marines spawned in a vent that cant be right marines always spawn with distress on the map start i thought?  </td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'> 
You're right. With a distress beacon, dead marines spawn at their original spawn points, just as if they'd joined when the game first started. I'm guessing the comm built an IP in the vent, which is why they were spawning into the vent.

FiendHZ · June 2003

There was a point a while back where me and some friends were playing (waiting for people to show up, actually) a little 2 vs 2 game on caged. Well, as the aliens almost always do in those cases, they won, but before they killed eitehr of us (or most of our base, just got the IP) we relocated to gen, on the grate below the bridge. We had to stack buidlings, but we got a comm chair and Armory there (IPs are too hard to stack) and had a observatory somewhere else (I forget where, but I know we needed JPs to get there). They didn't find us for almsot 20 minutes.

The funny thing was that their starting hive was gen <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'>

eaglec · June 2003

Joined a n00b server - comm wasn't giving any orders just dropping stuf, aliens weren't fairing much better and they were all fighting over generator room of all places. It being halfway through the game and not getting any orders I decided to have a look round. I got down to power silo and wondered round the corner to see a gorge leaving the other end... all that was there was 3 def chambers and a hive.
Seeing my comrads were repeatedly dying and accomplishing nothing at all I knifed the DC's -expecting to die I thought I'd save my ammo for the aliens that would leave the battle to kill the invading hive force. Potentially causing a significant distraction and allowing the 'team' (for want of a better word) to accomplish their objective, whatever the hell that was!
Well, nothing came <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/confused.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='confused.gif'> So I jumped up behind the hive and started knifing it. "This'll get their attention!" I thought.
I did stop slashing when aliens spawned at power silo but kept still behind the hive until they left. None of them even looked.

You guessed it I killed the hive with my knife. It took a while but I did it <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'>

Laughed my nuts off all evening after that <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'>

btw - we won.

____________________

I also remember as a n00b onos getting knife killed <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/nerd.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='nerd.gif'>
____________________

WarZer0 · June 2003

I think this picture sums it up. <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif'> And on a PUBLIC server no less.

Note: I photoshopped it a bit so that it's a bit brighter. Lot easier to see what's happening. And this pic was from the .dem file I recorded.

p4l · June 2003

My friend was also in the game and when I asked him about us spawning in the vent, he said he assumed we had an IP in there too (he was alien) because we shouldn't have spawned in there. I'm not sure if we did but I thought we all spawned at once, so an IP wouldn't do that? Maybe it was a bug or something, or maybe I'm just missing something (probably more likely sadly). Either way we were all stuck and it was indeed funny ^)^

Niloc1 · June 2003

It was a week or so ago, I was playing Marines which I dont do that often. But I was on the map with Port Engine, No Name, and Subspace. Our comm wasnt that good and we didnt get any hives. The aliens got all three, but for some reason didnt web up. They were all Onos, so I hopped in the CC, dropped two jps and two shotguns, myself and someone else loaded up on amo, and flew out to the hives, I went to Port Engine the other went to subspace, I got port down with out any problems, because the aliens were dumb, and didnt web, plus no one wanted to go from an ono to skulk to be able to reach me for an attack. My partner got subspace down the same way, and I flew through the vent to no name and also killed that hive. I couldnt believe that we had won. By the time I made this run I thought for sure we were dead, we had one RT, and the aliens had the whole map mostly. I just thought it was great. I had never seen a come back like that before.

So the moral of the story is, dont be stupid! Use webs.

PFCNublar · June 2003

i like raping oni who get stuck and can't get unstuck or are in really awkward places (like vents. some newbis evolve oni in the vent and then get really stuck).
*pulls out knife*
*smiles teh evil smile*
"GOT JOO BALLS!"

SoulSkorpion · June 2003

Just last night, I was a marine on ns_hera. The commander asked me to stay behind and defend base (we didn't relocate), so I did. Eventually, we got jetpacks. So I'm just wandering around the base, waiting for something to attack, and I notice one marine with a jetpack just jetting straight up and down in the middle of the base. I start jumping up and down next to him. He lands, and crouches. I hop on his head, and start jumping. He jets, and we both fly up towards the ceiling. I'm flying, without a jetpack, and not a word's been said, and I'm laughing hysterically into the voicecom <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif'>.

Unfortunately, I couldn't get a picture from the side, so this will have to do:

Nophel · June 2003

We were playing ns_tanith. I was a marine, and the "team" sucked terribly. Half and hour later the Khara start poping out them Onos, and I figure were dead so WTH. I ge tin the chair, drop HA, HMG and a Welder for me. 2 minutes later our base was wiped out, so I leave the chair and start shooting. I get a skulk, fade, and part of the Onos, but my armour is low so I pop back into the chair, wait a few seconds and them pop out. Back in full armour I go kill the Onos only to find anothe fade which I kill as he retreats. Then I drop an IP and build it. Needless to say I did more killing in 10 minutes with HMG and HA than the whole team did with HMG, JP, HA, GL in the whole round.

Ofcourse with no strucs but an IP they eventually got us.

RaVe · June 2003

This was way back....but me n my friend used to go on Mass Xenocide Rushes for quite a while,aiming for the TF

I like MXRs,they can irritate commanders a lot,and you dont have to worry about turrets.Got a bunch of turrets??MXR!

BTW,the comm was stupid enough to not realize that we got 3 hives <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif'>

But funniset thing that happened to me recently,is welding an Onos <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'>

BlackPanther · June 2003

I once knife 4 skulks in a row.
They were all noobs but it was still fun :

I also remember a game where the whole alien team was saving for onos. As soon as they rushed our base and were destroying it it, i took my JP and HMG and proceeded to destroy their hives 1 by 1 <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'>

OMG... so funny.

G-Fresh · June 2003

The map was Ninja Fall or something similar. My fellow aliens and I had just won the match. Since i just spawned i decided to jump down into the marine area. I must have timed it just right because instead of reappearing in the readyroom when the game reset, I appeared in the marine spawn. I wasnt on the marines team, the game still thought i was in the readyroom. I looked like a skulk but had the marine sounds as if i was in the ready room. Needless to say this caused massive confusion on the entire marine team <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/confused.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='confused.gif'> . The kept shooting at me and depleting their ammo. Then the real aliens arrived and quickly ended the match while the marines were reloading. Ive never seen this glitch before but it was hilarious seeing the marines panicking over the invincible skulk. <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'>

<img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/skulk.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='skulk.gif'> <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/skulk.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='skulk.gif'> <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/skulk.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='skulk.gif'> <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/asrifle.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='asrifle.gif'> <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/asrifle.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='asrifle.gif'> <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/asrifle.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='asrifle.gif'> <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/skulk.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='skulk.gif'>

Xzilen · June 2003

</span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (eon @ Jun 20 2003, 09:46 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> on the map with cargo, i was with another marine at the rt right outside the marine base and we were covering the hall to cargo. The other marine was hopping side to side, and he hopped right over the little rail and fell into the hole <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'>

I was laughing so hard

i've also seen people do that in generator(on the same map)

and also, one round on the same map(gee, i have a lot of funny stories from this map :\) i was playing alien and i was a skulk at viaduct. This one marine kept coming from cargo and i was protecting it(gorge was saving for hive and couldnt spare the res for ocs). The marine kept jumping down into via from the walkway and kept worldspawning himself. He did it like 3 times in a row.  </td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'> 
Heh, I have a similar story. As I was trying to hop away from a skulk in generator room after the Alien team had killed all of our ips off (I was the only marine left) I hop backwards right into the pit. Needless to say, we all had a very hearty laugh in the ready room afterwards <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif'>

Silicon · June 2003

</span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (G-Fresh @ Jun 21 2003, 12:36 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'>The map was Ninja Fall or something similar. My fellow aliens and I had just won the match. Since i just spawned i decided to jump down into the marine area. I must have timed it just right because instead of reappearing in the readyroom when the game reset, I appeared in the marine spawn. I wasnt on the marines team, the game still thought i was in the readyroom. I looked like a skulk but had the marine sounds as if i was in the ready room. Needless to say this caused massive confusion on the entire marine team <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/confused.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='confused.gif'> . The kept shooting at me and depleting their ammo. Then the real aliens arrived and quickly ended the match while the marines were reloading. Ive never seen this glitch before but it was hilarious seeing the marines panicking over the invincible skulk. <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'> </td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'>
Ya, this has happened to me before, but it was with a phase gate, I was phasing just as the game was ending and ended up in a empty map and then the next round started and I was in a marine-readyroom-skin walking around and I walked into the alien hive and they kept biting me but then stopped because they couldn't kill me, It was weird. Must be some rare bug.

Xzilen · June 2003

</span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (p4l @ Jun 20 2003, 03:24 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> Last night on Nancy, I was on a goofy marine team that pretty much gave up on playing seriously from the start. Anyways, as I was getting more and more flustered (b/c I think you only get silly *after* you know you've lost hehe) the comm dropped me a JP and an HMG and said I could go fight all the aliens myself if I wanted to.

I guess they had been saving up or something, because I came out to what I thought was their only hive *just* as they had the minerals to get fades. I took 3 of em out in gestation harharhar! Then a skulk hit me and made me look stupid. But I uh let him. Yeah.

Same map, later, I'm dead and our IP's have been down for a good minute or two, and the last remaining hider dropped three CCs in between himself and the world, in a vent (We had a RIDICULOUS amount of minerals because the comm never did anything). I am getting really angry just knowing I'll have to sit for 10 minutes or something because only 1 skulk can get up there at a time... and 3 CCs is alot of chewing. Then this guy techs up to observatory and uses a trick I didn't even know about, the distress beacon. Except he used it in the vent. 7 laughing perma-stuck marines aren't of much use... I don't know if the Kharaa team ever even figured out what we did. They were going to 3rd hive to get exploding skulks hehe.

we just f4'd.  </td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'> 
Um, distress beacon brings you back to the old marine start

enf0rcer · June 2003

more funny for the marines then us. I joined to find that we had no gorge and no res nodes save the one we start with. Marines had taken over the map with EVERY res node. They just marched into our hive and spammed TFs and turrets. They have something like 1000 res so the comm just covered the floor with med packs so when we spawned as aliens we could chomp on the marines a god 10 times and they'd jsut get medpack healed back to 100. They just stopped paying attention to us and built turrets instead. I managed to get one or two marines but really as soon as you spawned you got nailed.

e/ this pic is just when they were getting warmed up. <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/wow.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wow.gif'>

Agkelos · June 2003

Getting kicked and banned for "cheeting".

Delirium_Tremens · June 2003

One time I was a lone marine on ns_nancy, being ordered to build a RT in the mess hall. The door was closed when I got there, and I heard the familiar *squish squish* of a cuddly gorge. Looking forward to knife his butt into oblivion, I pulled out my knife, opened the door... and found 10+ gorges staring right at me! Needless to say, I ran for my life <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'>... they never got me. <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif'>

p4l · June 2003

</span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'>Um, distress beacon brings you back to the old marine start </td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'>

Yeah we addressed that. Read the rest of the thread man.

Funniest Moments In Ns?

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