Unknown enemy: chapter 8

RobRob Unknown Enemy Join Date: 2002-01-24 Member: 25Members, NS1 Playtester
in Fan-Fiction Forum
<div class="IPBDescription">--></div>Here's Chapter 8, I hope you like it, and let me know what you think:

<a href="http://members.fortunecity.com/rob6264/ue/ue.html" target="_blank">http://members.fortunecity.com/rob6264/ue/ue.html</a>

Also, all you writers out there, don't forget to email your stuff to <a href="mailto:hivefiction@readyroom.org">hivefiction@readyroom.org</a> from some wholesome pimpage!
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Comments

  • XTS_HighlanderXTS_Highlander Join Date: 2002-04-13 Member: 429Members
    Once again you dazzle us with your superior storytelling abilities.  One thing could be made clearer, however.

    <span style='color:red'>***SPOILER***</span> <span style='color:222222'>I don't understand Victor's motive fully yet.  sure he's insane, but if that were so he'd never have made it to Sergeant.  You see where I'm going with this?  I don't think it adds up.</span>

    Great work <!--emo&:D--><img src="http://www.natural-selection.org/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':D'><!--endemo-->
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  • ComproxComprox *chortle* Canada Join Date: 2002-01-23 Member: 7Members, Super Administrators, Forum Admins, NS1 Playtester, NS2 Developer, Constellation, NS2 Playtester, Reinforced - Shadow, WC 2013 - Silver, Subnautica Developer, Subnautica Playtester, Pistachionauts
    Well, XTS, I think (hidden info) - <span style='color:black'>he was a little more crazy about Mason, which set him off some. He wanted her, and she wasn't taking it. Also, in these large military groups, the odd, oddball can slip through the ranks. Not all crazy people are crazy all the time. But your point is valid also</span><!--emo&:)--><img src="http://www.natural-selection.org/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':)'><!--endemo-->
    Great work rob!



    <!--EDIT|Comprox|May 20 2002,20:16-->
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  • RobRob Unknown Enemy Join Date: 2002-01-24 Member: 25Members, NS1 Playtester
    ***SPOILER***

    Thanks guys, <span style='color:"#222222"'>Compy's got it about right, but also there could be a sneaking suspsion that Victor was a plant from the brass that didn't like Wilcox, but that might be thinking too far into on my end.</span>



    <!--EDIT|rob6264|May 21 2002,19:12-->
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  • SlycasterSlycaster Limited Edition Join Date: 2002-01-24 Member: 24Members, NS1 Playtester
    OMG Rob, dude, ahhhhh, your writing is so good, i seroisly need more NOW.  Please hurry with chapter 9, i need to see who the new sargeant is!
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  • Imperial_FistImperial_Fist Join Date: 2002-05-19 Member: 633Members
    this sounds good im gonna go read chapter 1 (jsut delaying work sigh)
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  • Sgt_XSgt_X Join Date: 2002-03-01 Member: 261Members
    this is nice work



    **Spoiler**







    I like how fst u got rid of that sgt. They capt. was right he is a disgrace to the TSA
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  • RobRob Unknown Enemy Join Date: 2002-01-24 Member: 25Members, NS1 Playtester
    Thanks guys!
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  • XTS_HighlanderXTS_Highlander Join Date: 2002-04-13 Member: 429Members
    "It's not enough, I need more!" - Tool

    Er, yeah.  More chapters please! <!--emo&:D--><img src="http://www.natural-selection.org/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':D'><!--endemo-->

    Hey I just remembered I'm the new editor, so I get to see it before anyone else does! BONUS!
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  • TraneTrane Join Date: 2002-02-01 Member: 148Members
    I just started reading your stuff, just the back story, and its great, I downloaded everything and am printing it out right now, probably going to read it all night.  Ill get back to you on chapter 8 tommorow after i read it.  <!--emo&;)--><img src="http://www.natural-selection.org/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/wink.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=';)'><!--endemo-->
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  • TraneTrane Join Date: 2002-02-01 Member: 148Members
    well, this is quite a story your developing, and its quite good.  How long are you planning on making this story? just curious.  waitin for chapter 9  <!--emo&:D--><img src="http://www.natural-selection.org/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':D'><!--endemo-->
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  • RobRob Unknown Enemy Join Date: 2002-01-24 Member: 25Members, NS1 Playtester
    Thanks Trane.  I'm making it as long as it takes to finish! <!--emo&:)--><img src="http://www.natural-selection.org/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':)'><!--endemo-->
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  • HollowHollow Join Date: 2002-05-28 Member: 679Members
    Holy ####, I just read that entire story!!!  Great work!!!  Just a few questions.  Did you make up all those equipemtn and ship names and tactics and such, or is that a necessary part of the NS universe?  Because my story has completely different ideas about tactics and things like that, so I was wondering if that is ok?  Great story man.
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  • RobRob Unknown Enemy Join Date: 2002-01-24 Member: 25Members, NS1 Playtester
    As far as tactics and ship names, it's mostly all my own creation.  The weapons and equipment are mainly NS World based.  You don't have to conform to anything in my story, except your own standards on how much like the real NS backstory you want it.  But that's not to say I would mind people building on my story's locations and tactics, to bind the whole of the NS Universe together and give us all cohesion.  In fact, I'd really appriciate it, but you are by no means bound to do so.

    Thanks for the comments everyone!



    <!--EDIT|rob6264|June 06 2002,16:38-->
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  • TechnoSnailTechnoSnail Join Date: 2002-05-30 Member: 706Members
    Wow, this is one of the best stories I have ever read! One more thing: Your story needs to be published <!--emo&:)--><img src="http://www.natural-selection.org/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':)'><!--endemo--> .
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