Share your most delightful newb stories

KwisatzHaderachKwisatzHaderach Join Date: 2012-02-06 Member: 143872Members, Reinforced - Shadow, WC 2013 - Supporter
Hoy guys,

I thought as a little compensation for all the poor vets who couldn't get a proper game up over the weekend, we could share our observations of the most entertaining newb behaviours.

As I didn't get to play much and overall had luck with my sheep (some really good games on mineshaft yesterday night!), I only have one hilarious moment to share:
we were marines on Veil and had a comm who went straight away for a Robotics Factory and Sentries. Noone seemed to have a clue what Extractors are good for etc. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about. So after some explaining from my side, the comm offered his chair to me and I hoped in. At that stage aliens were setting up at Skylights and Topo, with Fades and Lerks, it was nasty... In the middle of this mayhem there was one green one with a very positive attitude constantly posting stuff like "we can still win this" "we need robots!" "build some robots commander!"

Just what's the appeal of AI units to newbs in this game?
Anyway, I'm sure there's much better material out there than my petty little story, so let us know!

Disclaimer: No newbs were harmed in the making of this thread.

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Comments

  • KhazeKhaze Join Date: 2006-12-12 Member: 59031Members
    I've had to step in to the Commander's shoes quite often over the weekend to get atleast a half-decent game going on. My team has lost hives and bases and I thought many a time we we're done for, but at some point it hits me that the opposing team is just as green as mine is, so somehow we manage to recover and still end up winning the round.

    Comebacks are very common now. Losing a hive and half your harvesters usually means a death sentence, but not with so much green all around...
  • Super_GorgeSuper_Gorge Join Date: 2013-03-22 Member: 184212Members
    Played this one game tonight. About 70% new players on Marines, not sure how many on Aliens. Marines would take an area, run off, get killed and lose the gain they took. Com didn't drop phase gates. Typical New Player sentiment. Basically we got shoved back to Operations on Cave and it was grim. This was about 20 minutes in. I took over and started turtling as people already started vote conceding. Built the standard robo lab blocking both entrances, built MACs and multiple Armories. Blocked off the power.

    Lasted TWENTY more minutes being stuck on 1 RT. Luckily we had already researched flame throwers so spore wasn't that big of an issue. They almost took our power down 3 times but we were able to repair and hold. Killed maybe 5 Onoses who broke through. Had to remind them to focus more on welding than killing aliens. Take that Alien Fatties! Good Job Greenies on holding off the Alien Horde for 20 minutes. I found it refreshing that many of them listened and got flame throwers after learning that flame kills spores.

    On the first day of Free Weekend played a Veil map as Aliens. We had already taken 3 hives so Marines were looking grim. However, they were making a huge push towards overlook and a breakout looked like a real possibility. Couple of the Free Weekenders were like "Okay, what's the plan?" Told them to Onos if they could afford it and back up Overlook. I ran into an Onos headed towards Overlook and changed plans. I'd evolve to Gorge, a skulk in C-12 meets us outside Topo and we bum rush Control. There were only 2 marines out of 12 sitting in Control when we ram through and started breaking stuff. The rest of the Marine team freaked out and ran back to which we, like good Aliens, got the hell out of there. Alien com cysted in, placed crags, shifts and shades in Topo. I got killed biling and just went Onos. Rushed their power 6 minutes later with 2 Onos from both sides and ended it. New Players seem to think that Onos is invincible. I generally see non new players run if they're trying to save their Onos where new players get greedy on the kills (but who can blame them, they're a giant tank and after maybe 2 days of having not so good K:D, they're eager to change that).

    For Marines, I notice that there are basically three types of new player Marines:

    1) The ones who go off on their own and get slaughtered
    2) The ones who simply follow the pack (hence everyone but 1 guy headed in one direction, or everyone is building? I'll build too!)
    3) The ones who figured out who isn't an idiot and follow them around the ENTIRE game

    Had a new marine basically saying to me "I'm just following you" and when I was sitting in deposits waiting for a phase gate at 2 minutes (rushed it early, screw the Gap) was like "how long are we just going to stand here?" And then promptly stopped talking as a skulk entered the room.

    As much as people say the Free Player don't listen, I found that many of them do. The advice to Kill extractor first, then power seems to have taken hold. I don't expect them to learn the nuance of Observatory vs Power vs Phase gate vs Infantry Portal protocol, but they're getting there. Many seem to understand power is key, but not quite which other structures to take down first.

    One guy made a hilarious comment that he's starting to merge the maps all together, confusing which room is in which map. Sounds like we have a hooked user there!

    And some of them are now referring to Gorges as Hippos! Awesome.
  • MestaritonttuMestaritonttu Join Date: 2004-07-29 Member: 30229Members, Reinforced - Shadow, WC 2013 - Gold
    Yeah, explaining Kharaa lifeforms on mic sounds a bit silly...

    "The big bird does..."

    "With the fat pig you can..."

    "Those little doggies..."

    "The big rhino..."

    ...'s all good.
  • KwisatzHaderachKwisatzHaderach Join Date: 2012-02-06 Member: 143872Members, Reinforced - Shadow, WC 2013 - Supporter
    edited March 2013
    And some of them are now referring to Gorges as Hippos! Awesome.

    Let's do the Hippo Stomp!

  • Super_GorgeSuper_Gorge Join Date: 2013-03-22 Member: 184212Members
    Yeah, explaining Kharaa lifeforms on mic sounds a bit silly...

    "The big bird does..."

    "With the fat pig you can..."

    "Those little doggies..."

    "The big rhino..."

    ...'s all good.

    Lerk = Flying vermin

    Gorge = Alien Hippo/Pig

    Onos = Giant Scary Turtle Tank thingy

    No one seems to confuse what a fade is though.

    And Exo = Mech to which people say "AH!"

    Explaining ARCs takes some time though to people who just got the game.
  • YMICrazyYMICrazy Join Date: 2012-11-02 Member: 165986Members
    ^Idk man I have seen a lot of people call the fade "the ghost" probably because of blink and how it can surprise new player who are not aware this thing exists.
  • Super_GorgeSuper_Gorge Join Date: 2013-03-22 Member: 184212Members
    edited March 2013
    ^Idk man I have seen a lot of people call the fade "the ghost" probably because of blink and how it can surprise new player who are not aware this thing exists.

    That's not a bad description of it. But in my games, I haven't had anyone ask what a Fade does. Seems that they all got familiar with it when it attacked them when they started as Marines. Some do ask what Vortex does. I'm close to 200 hours on this game and I have YET to see someone use Vortex.

    I swear I hear a collective "****" from the new players when someone says "Fade (location)"

  • Rich_Rich_ Join Date: 2012-11-05 Member: 167152Members
    why do i think angry old man when i see the fade?
  • KhazeKhaze Join Date: 2006-12-12 Member: 59031Members
    "That teleporting thing is so op!" :D

    Yelled at me when I was fading on one occasion...
  • KattcattisKattcattis Join Date: 2013-01-31 Member: 182683Members, Reinforced - Shadow
    I played minechaft as aliens once. Was thinking I would try practice as fade a bit when I had the chance.
    Manage to survive and do a pretty good job, and I think the greens noticed, 'cause it didn't take to long
    before I saw multiple fades on the map.
    Which felt good because a lot of the times they never evolve and stick to skulk all game.
    Aliens are about lifeforms so always glad to see them trying out higher lifeforms :)
  • MestaritonttuMestaritonttu Join Date: 2004-07-29 Member: 30229Members, Reinforced - Shadow, WC 2013 - Gold
    edited March 2013
    Vortex should become a little more popular now that it selects a target and moves with it. Aka you can vortex an exo and proceed to kill all the marines around the exo, without worrying about the exo just walking out of the vortex. It's still a 3rd hive ability though, so it will be rare, but, ...meh.

    Err, off-topic. Sowwy. >_>
  • EmooEmoo Ibasa Join Date: 2002-12-20 Member: 11198Members
    Had a new alien commander on descent, both teams nearly all green except for 2 guys on marine who at the end of the game had a 40:10 kd (compared to everyone else that were around 10:10). Despite these two marines tearing through our team we managed to last long enough to get loads of onos as they got exos, killed of the duels and they started sending commander dropped single exos. Ended up as a base race, they had fab and launch, we had mono, drone and hydro. Exos marched in hydro, killed it, but we killed them and rebuilt. Then the exos marched into mono and killed it, at this point as all the aliens were rushing to defend it I called them back and we smashed launch and rebuilt a hive there. Proceeded to head towards fab as the marines headed towards drone, killed fab and won the game :)

    Felt good after a lot of players had been rage quiting aliens after getting torn apart through most of the game to actually win it.
  • SquishpokePOOPFACESquishpokePOOPFACE -21,248 posts (ignore below) Join Date: 2012-10-31 Member: 165262Members, Reinforced - Shadow
    edited March 2013
    Our commander (wasn't a newb, but we thought so at first) didn't understand us babbling rapidly in English. Best part is when I asked for Phase Gate and she said, "Not enough resources" exactly like the voice in Starcraft.
  • CataclyzmCataclyzm Join Date: 2005-01-06 Member: 33031Members
    *We need more vespine gas.* :P
  • buhehebuhehe Join Date: 2012-05-15 Member: 152140Members
    I've seen a skulk attacking turrets, standing right in front of them as they were shooting him.
    He didn't last long.

    I joined a game as a marine: the comm was Robo Factory spamming... after I while I facepalmed, I went spectating just to see that aliens' commander was spamming whips and nothing else.
    Not a single extractor had been built in the first 20 minutes.
  • xen32xen32 Join Date: 2012-10-18 Member: 162676Members, Reinforced - Supporter
    Explaining ARCs takes some time though to people who just got the game.
    Mobile microwave.
  • DC_DarklingDC_Darkling Join Date: 2003-07-10 Member: 18068Members, Constellation, Squad Five Blue, Squad Five Silver
    my biggest rundown for fun was the first evening..
    Both teams had no clue.. With some coaching they played a few matches later then many pug gamer who played for weeks.

    Yes.. beause they actively learned & listened I saw playstyles I hardly see like actually getting of the damn floor as skulks.
    Good times. :)
  • supsusupsu Join Date: 2012-04-24 Member: 151023Members, Squad Five Blue
    When I first met wiry, I was so delighted that I peed in my pants.
  • Ra1nRa1n Join Date: 2004-02-22 Member: 26798Members
    nothing special
    spectating a gorge while waiting to respawn happily jumping around ... and into a cavern in mineshaft.
    walking lerks
    the random skulk biting unbuild powernodes.
    a bunch of greens following me around the map mimicking everything i do.
    skulks/gorges using parasite/baitball as their main attack.


  • The_JanitorThe_Janitor Join Date: 2013-03-24 Member: 184320Members
    And some of them are now referring to Gorges as Hippos! Awesome.

    Damn, I like that! It could catch on.
  • Super_GorgeSuper_Gorge Join Date: 2013-03-22 Member: 184212Members
    Squishpoke wrote: »
    Our commander (wasn't a newb, but we thought so at first) didn't understand us babbling rapidly in English. Best part is when I asked for Phase Gate and she said, "Not enough resources" exactly like the voice in Starcraft.

    "Construct Additional Pylons"
    "We Require More Minerals"
    "Spawn More Overlords"
  • Super_GorgeSuper_Gorge Join Date: 2013-03-22 Member: 184212Members
    Vortex should become a little more popular now that it selects a target and moves with it. Aka you can vortex an exo and proceed to kill all the marines around the exo, without worrying about the exo just walking out of the vortex. It's still a 3rd hive ability though, so it will be rare, but, ...meh.

    Err, off-topic. Sowwy. >_>

    I think that all of the good fades who understand Vortex are content to just blink kill people.
  • NarfwakNarfwak Join Date: 2002-11-02 Member: 5258Members, Super Administrators, Forum Admins, NS1 Playtester, Playtest Lead, Forum Moderators, Constellation, NS2 Playtester, Squad Five Blue, Reinforced - Supporter, Reinforced - Silver, Reinforced - Gold, Reinforced - Diamond, Reinforced - Shadow, Subnautica PT Lead, NS2 Community Developer
    edited March 2013
    Cysting as the alien commander seems to be a nasty problem for new players especially when you start in a hive location with multiple elevation levels. People don't seem to grasp the concept of the cyst redeployment rings at all, and when the hive location doesn't give them many valid spots to start cysting out they seem to just keep spamming within the minimum range and get frustrated. Even trying to describe what the problem is and how to deal with it doesn't help all the time... I've had to just hop in and get them started with a cyst chain out the door a few times before letting them get another try, and by then it's just an exercise in learning some of the mechanics before the marines come and stomp us for having no resources, tech or map control 10+ minutes into the game.

    Usually getting frustrated at not being able to expand as alien commander = whips for days. Every time. So many games this weekend have been 2-3 whips dropped instantly before I can try to stop them. I really don't know what it is about static defense that makes people cream their panties so hard... it's not even a good idea in most RTS games unless you know there's an attack coming and absolutely need the defense to not die.
  • McCheeseMcCheese Join Date: 2012-11-21 Member: 172726Members
    New marine commander rebound his voice chat to the 'V' key, accidentally recycled both IPs in the middle of a game, lol.
  • NarfwakNarfwak Join Date: 2002-11-02 Member: 5258Members, Super Administrators, Forum Admins, NS1 Playtester, Playtest Lead, Forum Moderators, Constellation, NS2 Playtester, Squad Five Blue, Reinforced - Supporter, Reinforced - Silver, Reinforced - Gold, Reinforced - Diamond, Reinforced - Shadow, Subnautica PT Lead, NS2 Community Developer
    McCheese wrote: »
    New marine commander rebound his voice chat to the 'V' key, accidentally recycled both IPs in the middle of a game, lol.
    My roommate did this exact thing and it took the both of us almost the entire game to diagnose the problem. I think I did it the first time I commanded in NS2 as well, actually.
  • Ghosthree3Ghosthree3 Join Date: 2010-02-13 Member: 70557Members, Reinforced - Supporter
    Narfwak wrote: »
    McCheese wrote: »
    New marine commander rebound his voice chat to the 'V' key, accidentally recycled both IPs in the middle of a game, lol.
    My roommate did this exact thing and it took the both of us almost the entire game to diagnose the problem. I think I did it the first time I commanded in NS2 as well, actually.

    I use V to talk, just press Q every time you want to talk FIRST, and you'll have no problems.

    As to the best story, I was fighting a fade with a JP and SG, a lerk was standing on the ground next to us, waddling left and backwards, spraying gas at me.
  • NordicNordic Long term camping in Kodiak Join Date: 2012-05-13 Member: 151995Members, NS2 Playtester, NS2 Map Tester, Reinforced - Supporter, Reinforced - Silver, Reinforced - Shadow
    I have been seeing armories every room just as often as sentries. Phase gates seem to be a tough concept for new comms. And the cyst killing, the dreaded slow killing of each cyst all the way up to the hive/rt.

    Honestly, I had some of the best games I have ever had last night. I had some people who jumped at my offer to give tips and help. Which this leads into another noob thing; I was told to leave the server by two guys because it was "rookie" and I was too good. The server was an UWE official non green server. Some how official meant rookie. I argued with them for a minute saying it was not rookie and that the term is rookie friendly not rookie only. Then all the people I had helped backed me up and said I was great because I was helping them making the server more rookie friendly, not that it was a rookie friendly server.
  • briatxbriatx Join Date: 2013-01-18 Member: 180352Members
    I kept half a noob alien team busy for 5 mins in ball court by myself with a jetpack and shotgun. Would have held it if the comm could have figured out how to drop sentries (yes, the irony, I know).
  • amoralamoral Join Date: 2013-01-03 Member: 177250Members
    requesting silence from comma for 15 minute after we get camo meanwhile he's floating 100+ res. it's not like aliens are difficult to comm. greenie defending other greenie from third greenie when second greenie was taking a bit of time learning the ropes. hell even I was getting frustrated, and I was the one helping him.
  • ChizzlerChizzler Join Date: 2013-01-04 Member: 177532Members
    Best moment for me this weekend has to be a match on Saturday:

    Rookie player hopped into the Comm chair (Marine) before I joined the team (So had no idea he was a rookie)

    I then proceeded to request RT's, PG's and ARC's (when appropriate) using those terms. 10 Mins into the match, the Comm typed "Dude, I have no idea what anything your saying is".

    ...Oh...
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