Best of luck to you. Having an abusive parent, either physically or verbally; they both are really bad, is one of the more disgusting things humanity has to offer. I have yet to find another species where the parents abuse the children intentionally for reasons other than what is genetically built in to them to do.
Just keep working towards a better future. Work, save money, get an education and make plans. In situations like these, it helps to have motivation by being goal-oriented.
ThansalThe New ScumJoin Date: 2002-08-22Member: 1215Members, Constellation
/me shakes his head
Ignore the people telling you to suck it up. That dosn't work for most people, generaly it just makes things worse (I did it for for around 7 years of my life, I am still recovering).
I would personaly suggest staying away from places like the one that Caboose linked you to. They generaly are not healthy as it is a bunch of depressed people feeding off of each other. Yes you can rant there, yes you wil get sympathy, but you probably wont feel much better in the long run... (note: This is coming from some people who used to be involved in these groups, and me trolling around when I was depressed, seeing steryotypical lines from a cutter, and thinking, 'hey, that sounds kinda right' just isnt a good thing)
You are lucky, you seem to have a good friend in Erine, and probably some other friends also. Talk to them. If you can, spend more time out and about with em.
Though ranting to poeple on the net is nice, it never is a goodenugh substitute for real people (again, this one is from experiance). But if you do just need to scream about something, come on here and post it, and ignore the trolls if yah can <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/smile-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile-fix.gif' /><!--endemo-->
<!--QuoteBegin-camO.o+Oct 8 2004, 10:23 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (camO.o @ Oct 8 2004, 10:23 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> <!--QuoteBegin-Forlorn+Oct 8 2004, 10:21 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Forlorn @ Oct 8 2004, 10:21 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->How old are you?
Things improve a lot more once you get out of the damn house, as far as mental stability goes....
No matter what happens just tell yourself that crap changes (thankfully) and change keeps the world moving
And with the nice stuff said, I would like to say your signature sucks<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd--> This is the kind of thing that results from spending too much time admiring oneself in the mirror. You're not as pretty as you think, Forlorn. Please leave. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd--> I think forlorn is very pretty.
Thanks for the flaming guys, it really helped. You couldn't ignore them, could you? You'd rather yell at other people than help someone in need. Kitki is a good friend of mine, and I've helped him as much as I could (some of you have too). It's that few people that spoil everything.
<span style='font-size:14pt;line-height:100%'>If you're post has nothing to do with helping Kitki, SHUT THE FU*K UP.</span>
You just have to confront them... it's the only way to get your problems out there, unfortunately <!--emo&???--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/confused-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='confused-fix.gif' /><!--endemo-->
<!--QuoteBegin-Ice9+Oct 9 2004, 09:37 AM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Ice9 @ Oct 9 2004, 09:37 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Thanks for the flaming guys, it really helped. You couldn't ignore them, could you? You'd rather yell at other people than help someone in need. Kitki is a good friend of mine, and I've helped him as much as I could (some of you have too). It's that few people that spoil everything.
<span style='font-size:14pt;line-height:100%'>If you're post has nothing to do with helping Kitki, SHUT THE FU*K UP.</span> <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd--> Slow down there kid, this forum is not social services. IF you have a problem you should take care of it in REAL life not a forum for a game, if he is honestly screwing your life up that badly thern you need to see a therepist and call the police. That simple. Unless you ENJOY the obviously bad abuse you are given
<!--QuoteBegin-CommunistWithAGun+Oct 9 2004, 09:45 AM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (CommunistWithAGun @ Oct 9 2004, 09:45 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Slow down there kid, this forum is not social services. IF you have a problem you should take care of it in REAL life not a forum for a game, if he is honestly screwing your life up that badly thern you need to see a therepist and call the police. That simple. Unless you ENJOY the obviously bad abuse you are given <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd--> That's probably the best advice in this thread...
Things improve a lot more once you get out of the damn house, as far as mental stability goes....
No matter what happens just tell yourself that crap changes (thankfully) and change keeps the world moving
And with the nice stuff said, I would like to say your signature sucks<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd--> This is the kind of thing that results from spending too much time admiring oneself in the mirror. You're not as pretty as you think, Forlorn. Please leave. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd--> I think forlorn is very pretty. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd--> <3
Commie as soon as CS:S works on my computer we should start up a team
<!--QuoteBegin-camO.o+Oct 9 2004, 02:38 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (camO.o @ Oct 9 2004, 02:38 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Hey lookit, it's Forlorn and CWAG teaming together to ensure their everlasting reign of arrogance over these forums! <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd--> We call it protecting our interests.
Cold-night: I'll remember that.. I realized that going to a site where everyone else is 'depressed' isnt gunna help.. Unless I'm feeling particulary sadistic.. <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif' /><!--endemo--> That's not often
Thansal: I dont like to suck it up. I'm wuss and phyiscal, not all that strong.. That's not the point. Thanks for the help <!--emo&:D--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/biggrin-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin-fix.gif' /><!--endemo-->
Ice: Thanks for defending me.. You could have used better terms though
<!--QuoteBegin-CommunistWithAGun+Oct 9 2004, 09:45 AM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (CommunistWithAGun @ Oct 9 2004, 09:45 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> <!--QuoteBegin-Ice9+Oct 9 2004, 09:37 AM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Ice9 @ Oct 9 2004, 09:37 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Thanks for the flaming guys, it really helped. You couldn't ignore them, could you? You'd rather yell at other people than help someone in need. Kitki is a good friend of mine, and I've helped him as much as I could (some of you have too). It's that few people that spoil everything.
<span style='font-size:14pt;line-height:100%'>If you're post has nothing to do with helping Kitki, SHUT THE FU*K UP.</span> <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd--> Slow down there kid, this forum is not social services. IF you have a problem you should take care of it in REAL life not a forum for a game, if he is honestly screwing your life up that badly thern you need to see a therepist and call the police. That simple. Unless you ENJOY the obviously bad abuse you are given <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd--> Some people find it easier to express themselves on a forum. Maybe they don't have anyone to goto, and maybe this abuse is better than what they get in real life. Don't pretend that you've never looked to these forums for support - look through your own post history for example.
What? I've never had parental abuse. Ever, except for my dad not really being a father then again Ive talked to this person over msn and I am still dumbfounded how it is any of your business? You do nothing but follow people who you don't like across these forums and try your best to flamebait, In fact if I remember correctly thats why you had a name change, Last.
Jesus, the planets must have aligned, cause as Docchimpy said, CWAG gave some good advice.
This forum is not the place to get help. Neither is that place that caboose recomended. Thansal said that not me. However I agree. You can never substitute the internet for real life. It just doesn't work out right, and you will feel the after effects of it if you try to make it work.
People keep saying "suck it up" as if it is so easy to buckle down and take abuse. What no one seems to understand is that we only take abuse because we have no options. When we hear that there are options or the possibility of an alternative, then being told to sit back down and take it by choice for even a year just makes you sick to your stomach. I too had a father who did not begin to understand rational thought, and even after 17 years of torture, he still asks to borrow money from me. Believe me, the emotional baggage distributed by such actions takes a lifetime of healing.
But that healing cannot begin now, not while you are still in contact with him. For now you must understand that you have to push forward, and motivate yourself to work and ensure a future. Be goal oriented my friend. Rely on internet sources if you must, but your best chance is to build a network of real life friends who you can depend on. People who know you for who you are and that you can rely on. That in itself can be incredibly hard, but is far from impossible.
As you can tell these forums might not be the best place for seeking help. After all, despite our being a community, these kinds of issues are simply not something a gaming community is built to handle, from a Functional and Interactionist perspective. Internet relations in general, sociologically speaking, just can't begin to offer the support of real tangible friendships.
Nonetheless I wish you the best, and hopefully you won't have to know the depth of after effects some people have to go through from such mental scars.
CWAG, I seem to remember a certain incident where you asked the boards for help: <a href='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=78780&hl=uncle' target='_blank'>Here</a> and <a href='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=78879&hl=xbox' target='_blank'>here</a>.
Notice the many posts of wellwishing? Indeed it wasn't exactly a <u>personal</u> problem with abuse or somesuch, but we still supported you any way we could.
Now camO.o....were you elected the official board crusader when I wasn't looking? Do you notice anyone else responding to CWAG's or Forlorn's posts like you do? For every open-hearted truly caring post, those two balance the boards with a little sarcasm-injected reality. It gets annoying at times, even grating, but I for one wouldn't have it any other way <!--emo&;)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/wink-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wink-fix.gif' /><!--endemo--> .
Now, on to the topic....where is your mom in all this? Unless he really IS abusive, he'll shut the hell up and let you talk if SHE asks him to, and if she's there with you. If he still doesn't let you talk, then this officially goes beyond just caring too much about where one's son is headed, and dives right into abuse. There are hotlines. Keep them handy, and a phone in your room would be good. Just don't get depressed. It's not forever.
i read the first two journals then skipped the thread; heres my take;
Dont let other people affect you so much. Just because he's your father he has no right to make you feel so bad. let him be a jerk and quietly smile, knowing that you wont have any obligation to support him when he is old and incontinent. think about how he is going to need help going to the toilet someday and wishing he had been nicer to his children.
Throwing away your things is a tough one, youll have to keep tighter watch on them. lock things down as best you can, or carry the books with you more often. maybe if you kept things as clean as possible theyd have no excuse to go 'cleaning' in your room.
try to think about how you can make your life better instead of dwelling on this mud and standing at the edge of a cliff.
(a LOT of my friends went through similar, and i was no help to them either)
<!--QuoteBegin-TheCheeseStandsAlone+Oct 9 2004, 07:36 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (TheCheeseStandsAlone @ Oct 9 2004, 07:36 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> I agree with the dirty red <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd--> HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA
hilarious thanks for that <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif' /><!--endemo-->
Comments
Just keep working towards a better future. Work, save money, get an education and make plans. In situations like these, it helps to have motivation by being goal-oriented.
Ignore the people telling you to suck it up. That dosn't work for most people, generaly it just makes things worse (I did it for for around 7 years of my life, I am still recovering).
I would personaly suggest staying away from places like the one that Caboose linked you to. They generaly are not healthy as it is a bunch of depressed people feeding off of each other. Yes you can rant there, yes you wil get sympathy, but you probably wont feel much better in the long run... (note: This is coming from some people who used to be involved in these groups, and me trolling around when I was depressed, seeing steryotypical lines from a cutter, and thinking, 'hey, that sounds kinda right' just isnt a good thing)
You are lucky, you seem to have a good friend in Erine, and probably some other friends also. Talk to them. If you can, spend more time out and about with em.
Though ranting to poeple on the net is nice, it never is a goodenugh substitute for real people (again, this one is from experiance). But if you do just need to scream about something, come on here and post it, and ignore the trolls if yah can <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/smile-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile-fix.gif' /><!--endemo-->
Things improve a lot more once you get out of the damn house, as far as mental stability goes....
No matter what happens just tell yourself that crap changes (thankfully) and change keeps the world moving
And with the nice stuff said, I would like to say your signature sucks<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
This is the kind of thing that results from spending too much time admiring oneself in the mirror. You're not as pretty as you think, Forlorn. Please leave. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
I think forlorn is very pretty.
<span style='font-size:14pt;line-height:100%'>If you're post has nothing to do with helping Kitki, SHUT THE FU*K UP.</span>
<span style='font-size:14pt;line-height:100%'>If you're post has nothing to do with helping Kitki, SHUT THE FU*K UP.</span> <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
Slow down there kid, this forum is not social services. IF you have a problem you should take care of it in REAL life not a forum for a game, if he is honestly screwing your life up that badly thern you need to see a therepist and call the police. That simple. Unless you ENJOY the obviously bad abuse you are given
That's probably the best advice in this thread...
And it came from CWAG?!?
What the hell is going on?
<b><i><u><span style='font-family:Impact'><span style='font-size:27pt;line-height:100%'><span style='color:red'>THE APOCOLYPSE</span></span></span></u></i></b>
People watch too many Disney films.
Things improve a lot more once you get out of the damn house, as far as mental stability goes....
No matter what happens just tell yourself that crap changes (thankfully) and change keeps the world moving
And with the nice stuff said, I would like to say your signature sucks<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
This is the kind of thing that results from spending too much time admiring oneself in the mirror. You're not as pretty as you think, Forlorn. Please leave. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
I think forlorn is very pretty. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
<3
Commie as soon as CS:S works on my computer we should start up a team
We call it protecting our interests.
Thansal: I dont like to suck it up. I'm wuss and phyiscal, not all that strong.. That's not the point. Thanks for the help <!--emo&:D--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/biggrin-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin-fix.gif' /><!--endemo-->
Ice: Thanks for defending me.. You could have used better terms though
CWAG: Stay on topic?
<span style='font-size:14pt;line-height:100%'>If you're post has nothing to do with helping Kitki, SHUT THE FU*K UP.</span> <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Slow down there kid, this forum is not social services. IF you have a problem you should take care of it in REAL life not a forum for a game, if he is honestly screwing your life up that badly thern you need to see a therepist and call the police. That simple. Unless you ENJOY the obviously bad abuse you are given <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
Some people find it easier to express themselves on a forum. Maybe they don't have anyone to goto, and maybe this abuse is better than what they get in real life. Don't pretend that you've never looked to these forums for support - look through your own post history for example.
Or if you're artsy, in any media,
www.deviantart.com
I suggest checking out
<a href='http://kitki.deviantart.com' target='_blank'>This one too</a>
This forum is not the place to get help. Neither is that place that caboose recomended. Thansal said that not me. However I agree. You can never substitute the internet for real life. It just doesn't work out right, and you will feel the after effects of it if you try to make it work.
People keep saying "suck it up" as if it is so easy to buckle down and take abuse. What no one seems to understand is that we only take abuse because we have no options. When we hear that there are options or the possibility of an alternative, then being told to sit back down and take it by choice for even a year just makes you sick to your stomach. I too had a father who did not begin to understand rational thought, and even after 17 years of torture, he still asks to borrow money from me. Believe me, the emotional baggage distributed by such actions takes a lifetime of healing.
But that healing cannot begin now, not while you are still in contact with him. For now you must understand that you have to push forward, and motivate yourself to work and ensure a future. Be goal oriented my friend. Rely on internet sources if you must, but your best chance is to build a network of real life friends who you can depend on. People who know you for who you are and that you can rely on. That in itself can be incredibly hard, but is far from impossible.
As you can tell these forums might not be the best place for seeking help. After all, despite our being a community, these kinds of issues are simply not something a gaming community is built to handle, from a Functional and Interactionist perspective. Internet relations in general, sociologically speaking, just can't begin to offer the support of real tangible friendships.
Nonetheless I wish you the best, and hopefully you won't have to know the depth of after effects some people have to go through from such mental scars.
Notice the many posts of wellwishing? Indeed it wasn't exactly a <u>personal</u> problem with abuse or somesuch, but we still supported you any way we could.
Now camO.o....were you elected the official board crusader when I wasn't looking? Do you notice anyone else responding to CWAG's or Forlorn's posts like you do? For every open-hearted truly caring post, those two balance the boards with a little sarcasm-injected reality. It gets annoying at times, even grating, but I for one wouldn't have it any other way <!--emo&;)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/wink-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wink-fix.gif' /><!--endemo--> .
Now, on to the topic....where is your mom in all this? Unless he really IS abusive, he'll shut the hell up and let you talk if SHE asks him to, and if she's there with you. If he still doesn't let you talk, then this officially goes beyond just caring too much about where one's son is headed, and dives right into abuse. There are hotlines. Keep them handy, and a phone in your room would be good. Just don't get depressed. It's not forever.
Dont let other people affect you so much. Just because he's your father he has no right to make you feel so bad. let him be a jerk and quietly smile, knowing that you wont have any obligation to support him when he is old and incontinent. think about how he is going to need help going to the toilet someday and wishing he had been nicer to his children.
Throwing away your things is a tough one, youll have to keep tighter watch on them. lock things down as best you can, or carry the books with you more often. maybe if you kept things as clean as possible theyd have no excuse to go 'cleaning' in your room.
try to think about how you can make your life better instead of dwelling on this mud and standing at the edge of a cliff.
(a LOT of my friends went through similar, and i was no help to them either)
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA
hilarious thanks for that <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif' /><!--endemo-->