Progressquest

MazkalineMazkaline Join Date: 2003-02-11 Member: 13409Members
<div class="IPBDescription">Simple as it can be</div>
<a href='http://progressquest.com' target='_blank'>http://progressquest.com</a>

Fairly old game this one is. Just thought to let other people enjoy this too.
Progressquest is game where you wont need any skills, no strategies and where no-one will abuse you being noob <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif' /><!--endemo-->
Game consists of character creation, after which you press the button and game starts. Now you can happily look how your wondrous character feeds himself, goes about to kill mobs, sells stuff and goes kill some more. No input is required (nor possible) from you. After enough watching, just minimize it to system tray and forget it.
Then you can in couple months again wonder why there is still PQ running even its most useless program in existence. After that it can be minimized again and forgotten, experience is infinite and idling is easy.

There is a strange humour in it.
"Fetch me an inkwell." "Deliver this carrot" "Seek the spectral lamp" are not quite quests comparable to Holy Grail.
With your Demicanadian hero or Half Halfling Tongueblade you will surely beat the crap out of those 8 teenage Hair Elementals.

Actually I remember only one out of two buttons in game: Ctrl+b opens web browser in player rankings.
( <a href='http://progressquest.com/expo.php?name=Mazkaline' target='_blank'>http://progressquest.com/expo.php?name=Mazkaline</a> after couple years of 'playing')

So basically this is "Seti@home" without any kind of aim for better future.
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Comments

  • esunaesuna Rock Bottom Join Date: 2003-04-03 Member: 15175Members, Constellation
    Heh, it's quite cool really. I mean, well, it does nothing, but... yeah..... so, umm...

    I'm running it anyway. <!--emo&:D--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif' /><!--endemo-->

    Currently in Act 1 trying to Exterminate the Rust Monsters.
  • TychoCelchuuuTychoCelchuuu Anememone Join Date: 2002-03-23 Member: 345Members
    The point is that it makes fun of lots of MMORPG players, who use macros to do everything while they are AFK. I mean, if you're having your character advance while you go watch TV, why not just play progressquest? It does it all for you, no input required!
  • NumbersNotFoundNumbersNotFound Join Date: 2002-11-07 Member: 7556Members
    Anyone gonna make an NS guild?
  • 7Bistromath7Bistromath Join Date: 2003-12-04 Member: 23928Members, Constellation
    edited March 2004
    For some reason, watching the meters go back and forth reminds of the sound an armory makes when you hump it.

    Here's a screenie of my char. Of course, I took it about thirty seconds ago, so it's no longer current. <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif' /><!--endemo-->

    <img src='http://home.earthlink.net/~007bistromath/images/pqchar.JPG' border='0' alt='user posted image' />
  • QuaunautQuaunaut The longest seven days in history... Join Date: 2003-03-21 Member: 14759Members, Constellation, Reinforced - Shadow
    Oh man...this isn't half bad. I kind of like it...

    And I LOVE when it says "Executing a Undernourished Girl Scout"...and I'm a Ur-Paladin...heheh.
  • 7Bistromath7Bistromath Join Date: 2003-12-04 Member: 23928Members, Constellation
    Is it just me, or does this thing go faster when you're not watching it?

    PS: Updated screenie. Check out my ph47 13w7z!
  • QuaunautQuaunaut The longest seven days in history... Join Date: 2003-03-21 Member: 14759Members, Constellation, Reinforced - Shadow
    This is a nice little thing to check on now and again...

    and as you said, just imagine...in 1 month, I'll be level 143, and will be "Slaughtering King #999999999134141"
  • Nil_IQNil_IQ Join Date: 2003-04-15 Member: 15520Members
    I just wish i knew what half those words mean....

    Hauberk, Brassairts, Vambraces, Gambeson, Cuisses and Sollerets for example. Or is the idea you're not SUPPOSED to understand it, like the "background" <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif' /><!--endemo-->
  • 7Bistromath7Bistromath Join Date: 2003-12-04 Member: 23928Members, Constellation
    <!--QuoteBegin-Nil_IQ+Mar 7 2004, 04:00 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Nil_IQ @ Mar 7 2004, 04:00 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> I just wish i knew what half those words mean....

    Hauberk, Brassairts, Vambraces, Gambeson, Cuisses and Sollerets for example. Or is the idea you're not SUPPOSED to understand it, like the "background" <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif' /><!--endemo--> <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    <a href='http://homestarrunner.com/dungeonman.html' target='_blank'>With your last breath, you wonder what parapets are...</a>
  • NuketheplaceNuketheplace Join Date: 2002-09-02 Member: 1266Members
    Ok that StrongBad game make no since to me. How do you do anything?

    I type pick up flask, or pick flask and noting happens. WHAT DO YOU DO??
  • 7Bistromath7Bistromath Join Date: 2003-12-04 Member: 23928Members, Constellation
    <!--QuoteBegin-Nuketheplace+Mar 7 2004, 04:33 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Nuketheplace @ Mar 7 2004, 04:33 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Ok that StrongBad game make no since to me. How do you do anything?

    I type pick up flask, or pick flask and noting happens. WHAT DO YOU DO?? <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    You've never played Zork, or any other text adventure, have you?

    Try "get flask."

    I must warn you however, that it will not work.

    Anyway, try going to places, talking to people, taking stuff. Pretty much anything you can type in there. This is EXTREMELY primitive as "parselies" go, so most of it won't work. Type help, if you need it.
  • NuketheplaceNuketheplace Join Date: 2002-09-02 Member: 1266Members
    Help doesn't really help me out, and no I've never played Zork, I'm to young.
  • Marik_SteeleMarik_Steele To rule in hell... Join Date: 2002-11-20 Member: 9466Members
    <!--QuoteBegin-Nuketheplace+Mar 7 2004, 04:33 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Nuketheplace @ Mar 7 2004, 04:33 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Ok that StrongBad game make no since to me. How do you do anything?

    I type pick up flask, or pick flask and noting happens. WHAT DO YOU DO?? <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    [Offtopic]And when you're done frustrating yourself with that, play <a href='http://www.spatch.net/games/play.cgi?game=putpbad' target='_blank'>Pick Up The Phone Booth And Die</a>. Yes, there <i>is</i> a way to end without dying. But mostly it's about picking up the phone booth. And dying. Lots and lots of picking it up and dying.[/offtopic]

    Back to progress quest: does your character progress at the same rate offline as he/she does online?
  • JimmehJimmeh Join Date: 2003-08-24 Member: 20173Members, Constellation
    I've played Zork and i'm younger than you <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif' /><!--endemo-->

    As for Progressquest... its "intresting"
  • JaspJasp Join Date: 2003-02-04 Member: 13076Members
    edited March 2004
    Im pretty sure you have to play it online as the game sends packets of imformation now and again to the server.

    <!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->Q: I started my character offline, and now I regret it. Is there a way to turn him/her into an online character, listed on the Hall of Fame?
    A: Unfortunately, no, there is not. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->

    Seems you can play it offline but you dont get ranked.
  • NuketheplaceNuketheplace Join Date: 2002-09-02 Member: 1266Members
    What are you talking about Progressquest is the best hack n' slash game ever made.
  • JediYoshiJediYoshi The Cupcake Boss Join Date: 2002-05-27 Member: 674Members
    Anyone remember the trailor on FilePlanet they put up once?

    <!--emo&::nerdy::--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/nerd.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='nerd.gif' /><!--endemo-->
  • Cold_NiTeCold_NiTe Join Date: 2003-09-15 Member: 20875Members
    IS there ANY WAY to win "Thy Dungeonman!" ?? <!--emo&???--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/confused.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='confused.gif' /><!--endemo-->
  • XythXyth Avatar Join Date: 2003-11-04 Member: 22312Members
    edited March 2004
    I executed an underage koala! ahahaha
    Hmmm I got a kobold schlong <!--emo&???--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/confused.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='confused.gif' /><!--endemo-->

    Does it automaticalle start when the computer turns on or you connect to the internet or somthing?
  • 7Bistromath7Bistromath Join Date: 2003-12-04 Member: 23928Members, Constellation
    <!--QuoteBegin-Marik_Steele+Mar 7 2004, 04:41 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Marik_Steele @ Mar 7 2004, 04:41 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> [Offtopic]And when you're done frustrating yourself with that, play <a href='http://www.spatch.net/games/play.cgi?game=putpbad' target='_blank'>Pick Up The Phone Booth And Die</a>. Yes, there <i>is</i> a way to end without dying. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    Pssh. If you just follow directions, you should get it right the first try.
  • 7Bistromath7Bistromath Join Date: 2003-12-04 Member: 23928Members, Constellation
    edited March 2004
    <!--QuoteBegin-Cold-NiTe+Mar 7 2004, 05:26 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Cold-NiTe @ Mar 7 2004, 05:26 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> IS there ANY WAY to win "Thy Dungeonman!" ?? <!--emo&???--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/confused.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='confused.gif' /><!--endemo--> <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
    Yes.

    PS: Thy Dungeonman II is another story, though. If there's a way to win, I don't know it.
  • QuaunautQuaunaut The longest seven days in history... Join Date: 2003-03-21 Member: 14759Members, Constellation, Reinforced - Shadow
    Crud...I'm obsessed with Progress Quest.

    I had to restart at level 5, because I didn't do multiplayer. So now, I'm level 6(almost 7), rich as hell, have the SWEETEST stats(starting total: 81!!!!), and frankly kick butt. I just finished a quest to get rid of the "White Dragons"
  • XythXyth Avatar Join Date: 2003-11-04 Member: 22312Members
    I executed a can of sprite....
  • Cold_NiTeCold_NiTe Join Date: 2003-09-15 Member: 20875Members
    <!--QuoteBegin-007Bistromath+Mar 7 2004, 09:05 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (007Bistromath @ Mar 7 2004, 09:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> <!--QuoteBegin-Cold-NiTe+Mar 7 2004, 05:26 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Cold-NiTe @ Mar 7 2004, 05:26 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> IS there ANY WAY to win "Thy Dungeonman!" ?? <!--emo&???--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/confused.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='confused.gif' /><!--endemo--> <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
    Yes.

    PS: Thy Dungeonman II is another story, though. If there's a way to win, I don't know it. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    Mind telling us how? I don't mind spoilers...
  • The_RedeemerThe_Redeemer Join Date: 2002-12-24 Member: 11490Members, Constellation
    yes 007Bistromath there is a way to beat dungeonman II. =D
  • BadKarmaBadKarma The Advanced Literature monsters burned my house and gave me a 7 Join Date: 2002-11-12 Member: 8260Members
    <!--QuoteBegin-Quaunaut+Mar 7 2004, 09:10 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Quaunaut @ Mar 7 2004, 09:10 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> stats(starting total: 81!!!!), <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    87!! I clicked for a half hour. Oh yea im cool.
  • NuketheplaceNuketheplace Join Date: 2002-09-02 Member: 1266Members
    I started with 71, I think thats good enough.
  • ConfuzorConfuzor Join Date: 2002-11-01 Member: 2412Awaiting Authorization
    <!--QuoteBegin-Marik_Steele+Mar 7 2004, 01:41 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Marik_Steele @ Mar 7 2004, 01:41 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> <!--QuoteBegin-Nuketheplace+Mar 7 2004, 04:33 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Nuketheplace @ Mar 7 2004, 04:33 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Ok that StrongBad game make no since to me.  How do you do anything?

    I type pick up flask, or pick flask and noting happens.  WHAT DO YOU DO?? <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
    [Offtopic]And when you're done frustrating yourself with that, play <a href='http://www.spatch.net/games/play.cgi?game=putpbad' target='_blank'>Pick Up The Phone Booth And Die</a>. Yes, there <i>is</i> a way to end without dying. But mostly it's about picking up the phone booth. And dying. Lots and lots of picking it up and dying.[/offtopic]

    Back to progress quest: does your character progress at the same rate offline as he/she does online? <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    Holy crap, I finished that game on my second try. And I've only played one text-based game ever, (A Mind Forever Voyaging).
  • NuketheplaceNuketheplace Join Date: 2002-09-02 Member: 1266Members
    Wow how did you do that? I can't even figure out the command to get past the first part. Let alone the entire game.
  • CplDavisCplDavis I hunt the arctic Snonos Join Date: 2003-01-09 Member: 12097Members
    So basically you make a character and do nothing....

    nice <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif' /><!--endemo-->
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