Funniest Things A Nsplayer Comm Ever Said/done

homerx · May 2003

<div class="IPBDescription">post them all here!</div> i would like to clear something up:

i am NOT in any way, shape, or form against new NS players...

heck, these guys provide us with hours of fun-packed quality entertainment...

HERES MINE: "do you guys want those super pistols?"

I ALMOST FELL OFF MY CHAIR LAUGHING SO HARD <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif'>

ROFL.

Brave_Ulysses · May 2003

But those weapon upgrade icons DO look like superpistols!

Carling · May 2003

WHAT ! you trying to say there isnt a super pistol ? noooooo no wonder all thoes comms wouldnt give me one lol.

Mine would be : What do i do ?

Marik_Steele · May 2003

How do I research waypoints?

That_Annoying_Kid · May 2003

NSplayer "what do those blue circles mean?"
"when they get really big you die"

Cowswin · May 2003

Joining a random server I found only 4 players on it (not including myself). I go aliens as usual.

NSPlayer: How do I evolve?

Me: Right click your mouse, it's in the menu.

NSPlayer gorges.

NSPlayer: How do I build things?

Me: Right click your mouse, it's in the menu.

NSPlayer begins to build a sensory because he said cloaking looked cool or something along those lines.

Me, runs to marine base to find marines humping armory, proceed to digest marine intestines.

NSPlayer: How do I upgrade myself now? It says new upgrades are available.

Me (*sighs*): Right click your mouse, it's in the menu.

Me, shows the comm some pretty teeth as he hops out of the comm chair.

Me: gg

We spawn back at ready room, I prepare to leave the newbie server I realized I was on.

NSPlayer: WTH(f) you liar, right clicking made me get kicked out of the game you dumb @#$!@#$!@#$ (explicatives continue)

Newbies are so silly <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif'>

<img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/skulk.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='skulk.gif'> r teh rox!

cr3am · May 2003

absolutely nothing at all.

"Commander, we have 350 resources, all upgrades, and you're not giving us anything"
" "

MrMoFo · May 2003

"i think they got an onos watch out"

... about 3 minutes into the game

cr3am · May 2003

OMG, i just remembered:

"Guys, kill more aliens, they have all four hives!!!"

Methodical · May 2003

[FONT=Geneva][COLOR=red]This is one i here pretty often"cool im a flying what are all these buttons for?" and then we have to kick him. <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/mad.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='mad.gif'> Hey but were'nt we all newbies <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/wow.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wow.gif'>

James_H4xwell · May 2003

Oh boy lemme think. Well this one came from me. I just joined a server for the first time (went gorge too heh cuz im usually the person that builds everything in every game, I actually didnt get flammed too). I went out of the hive and started to build a building (this is 1.02 now,) and it blew up in my face. I said "Why do all my buildings explode in my face?" After repeatedly getting blown up by a siege about 10 times. (just imagine this stupid newby putting up offence chambers and getting owned and then doing it over and over) Of course after that i went into combat gorge mode and pwned the whole marine team and every marine on it with gorgespit (not really but this post is starting to get stupid).

ThePhilips · May 2003

NSplayers dont say stuff, they do all sort of depressing and frustrating things that makes you hate the world.

X_Stickman · May 2003

quite a few things for me.

1)
*Round has just started*
NSPlayer: "Can i have one of those things that lets you fly??!?"
Comm: "No"
NSPlayer: "Why? FFS YOU'RE SAD"

**NSPlayer has quit**

2)
*Second IP has just dropped*
NSPlayer: "Give me a welder"
Me: "Why?"
NSPlayer: "So i can build that Phase Gate, n00b"

3)
*near the end of the game. 3 on 3, but one of the marines was a total, serious idiotic n00b. We had to reloacte TWICE cos he got in the comm chair and built a base in an empty hive. Trouble was, we WERE STILL IN OUR BASE. Anyway, the other person had got in the comm chair, and i was building the TF outside their hive for a siege (i dont like siege, but they were pretty much a better team than us, even though i had killed 7 gorges)*

Me: "Hey, come and help me build these? i cant build and hold off 3 skulks"

The N00b: "Comm, put the RT in main base!1?!!!?"

Me: "Hey, SUYF and get here and help me"

The N00b: "WE NEED RES YOU NOB!!11"

Me: "IF WE BUILD THIS WE WIN!"

The N00b: "GOD YOU'RE SUCH A N00B COMM WE NEED RES!!111!!11!"

We won anyway.

Kazyras · May 2003

</span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Nomble @ May 28 2003, 10:47 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'>NSplayers dont say stuff, they do all sort of depressing and frustrating things that makes you hate the world.</td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'>
I have to agree. It's like every NSPlayer follows some strict religion that forbids them to communicate in any way and prevents them from behaving in a remotely intelligible fashion.

esuna · May 2003

Just had a great one.

I feel a bit mean for doing this, but it was at a point where the end was inevitable, so i thought i would for fun.

NSPlayer: Comm can i have a big gun

[dc]:[::esuna::] : Ok *drops a welder*

[dc]:[::esuna::] :This is the best gun in the game

NSPlayer: Thanks *starts welding in the direction of a Fade

[dc]:[::esuna::] : ROFLMAO

He actually believed it was the best gun <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif'> I can be so cruel sometimes.

homerx · May 2003

ROFL.

FlyFlown · May 2003

well, it was just a few mins ago.

**Round Start**
The comm gave us IPs, armory after a deloc to sewer in ns_caged. Game looked fine this far.
We try to take some ress nodes. Then I see a bunch of 4 marines, decide to follow them.
We go through the whole maps, killing some aliens. We arrive to Generator (the other side of the map), I look who I'm with to see the comm was with us. When I asked what he was doing here he told me : "Well I was checking if they hadn't the second hive built".

homerx · May 2003

can i join your clan, [No-CD]/[Old-CD]?

<img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'>

JoyRide · May 2003

I don't know if you all will find this as funny as me but it's about me.

The first time I comm'ed we were doing pretty good until the comm dropped out. It was my first time in the comm chair and people were already demanding things of me, the comm chair was telling me to select my troops and give them orders and two res towers were being eaten. I freaked out, I wanted out of the chair. I was asking them to eject me, trying to kill myself, everything I could think of to get out of the chair. Ended up disconnecting because in my panic I didn't see the logout button.

~JoyRide <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/asrifle.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='asrifle.gif'> <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/skulk.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='skulk.gif'> <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/mad.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='mad.gif'> ,but <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/skulk.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='skulk.gif'> <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/asrifle.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='asrifle.gif'> <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'>

wlibaers · May 2003

</span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (cr3am @ May 28 2003, 10:26 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> absolutely nothing at all.

"Commander, we have 350 resources, all upgrades, and you're not giving us anything"
" "  </td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'> 
Ah, had something like that happen to me recently, with n00b (no, not "a n00b", just "n00b", that was his in-game name).

He didn't really say anything to us, but we tried very hard to make him build an IP. He got into the CC at the beginning, most of us and the res node were eaten, but the CC wasn't attacked by the aliens. As we were dead, we couldn't even chat with the aliens, so we kept asking n00b to build an IP. By the time we started to build a base (yes, he did eventually get an IP), the aliens wanted to know if we were ready to welcome an Onos and some fades into our base <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/confused.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='confused.gif'>

MrSNEAKY · May 2003

<img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tiny.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tiny.gif'> <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tiny.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tiny.gif'> <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tiny.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tiny.gif'> <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'> <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif'> Hey all the only superpistol I have is in my pants for the gals lmao lol.

Lazer · May 2003

Some comm I had was asking people how to upgrade to the laser weapons... Not sure what he meant, cuz he didn't mean mines...

Infected_Marine · May 2003

One time, durring a small game our comm lept out of the chair and some guy jumped in. After a minute of doing nothing he asked over the voice chat with frustration "<i>Why is it not letting me buy myself a gun, I keep on clicking it but it won't give me it!</i>"!

Lee_Harvey · May 2003

On the topic of superpistols, there is a modification on the [WHO] Modified Selection server, that turns pistols into semi-automatic siege cannons. Its pretty funny. There's one somewhere else that does the same to parasites.

I think one of the funnier ones was during a game of 3 on 2. I was commanding and I had given us all HAs, one guy an HMG, one a Shotty, I kept my LMG, and all 3 of us had welders. We were all getting ready to leave to go kill a hive, but I decided to turret farm for a minute before we left. After a TF and like 6 turrets (which we did have the immediate res for), we get ready to move out, and some guy says "When we lose I'm going to say I told you so."

It's like half funny and half sad, because people are so indoctrinated against TFs in base, even when fades are starting to come around.

I guess the absolute funniest one would be "WTH?!? I was flying and then I hit this white string thing and fell and died!" Or something to that extent.

NSCypher · May 2003

ns_caged, marines, relocating to generator hive in a last vain hope to stop the aliens getting 3 hives before they won...

*comm chair, two IPs, armoury and tf go up, comm dies at main and someone else gets in the new chair*
*tf begins to wobble*
*pause*
Marine1: Comm, why are you upgrading the tf instead of making some turrets?
*no reply, sound of fades approaching*
*4 siege cannons appear*
Comm(as the base is ripped apart): why arent the super turrets shooting them??

I almost killed myself laughing at this, and so did most of the aliens when I explained it to them after...

TheWizard · May 2003

Most stupid thing a comm ever said I have seen:

"darnit you stupid n00bs why the hell arent you going there?"
"Aliens are tearing down our structures"
"OMG this team are all F _ing n00bs"
"You suck"
"what the hell are you all 10 years old?"
"darnit we lost it"
"game over you F _ing n00bs"

-Do you know what was missing from what the comm was yelling at us?
-He never told us what or where was under attack <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif'>

Keyser · May 2003

Well I was commander once, and a bunch of uncarapaced skulks ran in and killed NSplayer, (1)NSplayer, and a bunch of other n00bs and they ate our IPs.

I said "damn, I guess I forgot to upgrade skill"

NSplayer says "OMG what structure upgrades skill?"

Sometimes I wish the game did have a skill upgrade

DAMN you lee harvey for stealing my sig avatar.

Renegade · May 2003

</span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'>No, your other left!</td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'>

Forlorn · May 2003

Funniest comm experience:

I was a spectator.

The game was 2 aliens vs. 2 marines.

After some deliberation, Marine1 goes into the comm chair, and Marine2 runs off somewhere.

About 10 seconds later, there are two unbuilt IP's at base with a comm who had gotten out to build them but was killed by the two rushing skulks.

The ramboing Marine was soon killed thereafter.

The next game right after:

Marine1: "HEY EVERYONE LOOK AT ME!!"
Marine1: "I AM SO RAMBOEY THAT I RAMBO OFF BEFORE I EVEN GET MY SPAWN PORTALS UP!"
Marine1: "NOT TO MENTION THAT, BUT I COULDN'T EVEN KILL ONE OF THEM BEFORE I DIED!"
Marine1: "I SUCK!"

Marine2: "SUYF n00b"

I laughed for a good 4 min straight on this one.

HungryHippo · May 2003

</span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (::esuna:: @ May 28 2003, 11:01 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> Just had a great one.

I feel a bit mean for doing this, but it was at a point where the end was inevitable, so i thought i would for fun.

NSPlayer: Comm can i have a big gun

[dc]:[::esuna::] : Ok *drops a welder*

[dc]:[::esuna::] :This is the best gun in the game

NSPlayer: Thanks *starts welding in the direction of a Fade

[dc]:[::esuna::] : ROFLMAO

He actually believed it was the best gun <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif'> I can be so cruel sometimes.  </td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'> 
<img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'> <img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'> nice one.

kavasa · May 2003

Lee Harvey - yeah, I am that indoctrinated against TFs. If the fades are coming, a TF in base isn't going to kill any hives, so I'd rather not spend res on it. If it's the beginning of the round, if marines can't hold base without a TF, they're screwed anyways. I've seen a couple ADD comms who can keep track of such things use TFs to defend RTs and cut up the map while pinging around, keeping the gorge(s) dead etc, but in general... I'm just not a fan of 'em.

As someone said, most NSPlayer comms are merely silent. I have no problem with someone who's new, I have no problems losing a couple rounds to an inexperienced comm, but <i>talk</i> damn you! Ask questions! We'll help!

Anyways uh. Damn. I haven't really had any noob comms say funny things. :|

Funniest Things A Nsplayer Comm Ever Said/done

Comments