Dark Harbinger

RatfireRatfire Join Date: 2003-03-31 Member: 15091Members
edited April 2004 in Fan-Fiction Forum
<div class="IPBDescription">Chapter 1</div> Marcus would have spit, but with the Automated Vids the police kept around now, he’d probably be fined a credit.
The kid sitting in front of him talking was a green, never been to combat. Never seen Hera or fought to hold out Eclipse Command. Never seen a skulk rip out a man's throat, and watch as his uncontrolled body fired off the remaining thirty two rounds in his LMG.
“God the TSA is turning them out young,” Marcus thought. “Hell, this one’s probably young enough to be my kid, if I had one.”
Gina. That was a name that brought back memories, none of them good anymore. She was why he had joined up. People in his position, educated, steady job, they didn’t join up, they weren’t even in the selective service pool of the unskilled workers. But for Marcus, it was different.
Kharaa had hit the outer ring; terran worlds 18.7 billion civilians spread over four planets; one hundred twenty million survivors.
Not that he cared.
Gina had died in the first wave, Corpus Colony, Anteres. No one from Anteres had come out alive. All one hundred twenty came from Yaavin, Ralu, and Parsis.
Not that he cared.
Marcus spit, then cursed as his integrated voice comm. lit up.
“You have been fined one credit for public defacement.” Said a soft voice in his ear.
“Damned nanotech.”
The recruit across from Marcus had stopped talking, not knowing what to say.
Marcus dashed his cigarette against the grate at the edge of the table.
“What Com are you training under kid?” he grunted.
“Captain Richards, 7th Company, Squad 3C, Sir. We’re securing Space Station Excelsius in seventy two hours.”
“You trained with HA before?”
“Yes sir, at Recruit Post Spacedock, we ran through mock jumps and heavy armor training." He paused, "I’m ready for this sir.”
The way the recruit smiled made Marcus sick. He didn’t have a care in the world, like every single one before him; they all thought heavy armor made them invincible.
Not that it mattered much, the fight for SS Excelsius had already taken place. Securing the space station would probably require nothing more than hunting down a rogue skulk that somehow managed to escape the backlash of the hive being destroyed.
The light on his voice comm. lit up again, “Field Sergeant Marcus, report to Command Section Delta for briefing,” the soft voice intoned.
Marcus rose and looked around, another two or three weeks before he’d be back in the comfort of a space station rec lounge like this one.
“I’ll see you later kid,” he said, “Watch your back on Excelsius.”
“Yes sir!” the recruit barked back, still smiling.
Marcus scowled.

Comments

  • DeepShadowsDeepShadows Join Date: 2003-02-11 Member: 13408Members, Constellation
    This is probably one of the first stories I've seen developing that seem to stand for themselves. Plus, you've gone on to fill the background of the storyline a bit. Besides the fact that it's GENIUS!!! *hugs* I LOVE YOU!!!! People like you should be given lots of money.


    People like me, too <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif'><!--endemo-->

    I am tired... I await the next installment, if there is one. <!--emo&???--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/confused.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='confused.gif'><!--endemo-->
  • That_Annoying_KidThat_Annoying_Kid Sire of Titles Join Date: 2003-03-01 Member: 14175Members, Constellation
    good fan-fic, me wants more
  • CanadianWolverineCanadianWolverine Join Date: 2003-02-07 Member: 13249Members
    Hehe, that is one sour old grunt, no wonder they haven't promoted his **** out of field combat yet. And that justs the thing, you have fleshed the character out, and it seems to me that he is just one grumpy old veteran. This is more detail than you can shake a stick at, wonderful, thank you for sharing this story with us, I hope you had as much fun writing it as I did reading it.
  • Lumberjack_WannabeLumberjack_Wannabe Join Date: 2003-03-11 Member: 14404Members, Constellation
    edited April 2003
    Excellence is bliss. The way that you can bring everyone to the world is just awesome! I felt like kicking Marcus and joining his side at the same time.... hehe.
  • RatfireRatfire Join Date: 2003-03-31 Member: 15091Members
    edited May 2003
    I really need to find a place to put all of this. My personal site is on Tripod, which...Bleh! Plus you can't link offsite so people have to type everything in. I'll try to find somewhere to post the entire story, since you're not really supposed to post more than a half page here. But until then, here's chapter 2.

    Chapter 2

    “The merit of any man is found in his ability to stare into the eyes of the demon, and to stand his ground.”
    -<i>Field Colonel Marshall Galvan, On first encounter with a skulk</i>

    The briefing had been unusually short. Captain Yavkawitz normally gave longer talks and more information. Marcus and the others had known what it meant; it was going to be rough.
    Frontiersman always sat aft, in the dropship section of a cruiser. Marcus was on the TSAC Marie Donnovan; One of the larger cruisers in the assault fleet. The place they were headed was called TSAS Richard Bingham.
    The Bingham was the largest starship ever created, the flagship of the TSA fleet. With the ability to dock up to five cruisers, and a standing crew of over fifteen thousand, the Bingham was like a space station with engines. TSAS Richard Bingham served in six separate campaigns against Kharaa controlled worlds, all successful.
    The Kharaa must have thought so too.
    The fleet larger than any the TSA had ever seen before, had encircled the Richard Bingham on the eve of its seventh campaign. Upwards of eighty thousand aliens boarded the Bingham and its docked cruisers. From the TSA vids that were transmitted before the nano-gridlock wiped them out, it was obvious that the crew of the Bingham fought hard, and well.
    TSA Command estimated that the average soldier went down with a ten to one ratio. Not that they ever had a chance. The initial assault, plus whatever the Kharaa could pump out from the hives once they got onboard meant that any fighting was a lost cause.
    The TSA didn’t stress that though, the vids they showed were only to prove that every last Frontiersman and crewmember on the TSAS Bingham went down a hero, more than fulfilling their duty to all of humanity. They didn’t stress the decision for the cruisers not to abandon the Bingham, the extra thousands that could have been saved but weren’t. It was all a bunch of crap.
    Not that it mattered.
    Marcus shook his head. “Luck, pure ***damn luck.”
    The TSAC Marie Donnovan was one of five cruisers slated to launch from the Richard Bingham for the seventh campaign. In one of those grim twists of life and death, that can happen so often in war, the Donnovan’s primary engine system malfunctioned and the cruiser made a detour to Spacedock for nanotech repairs.
    As the last surviving ship from first fleet, the Donnovan was reassigned.
    Not that Marcus cared.
    He had seen to many die already to be affected by any more. Hell, 1st Battalion, Squad Alpha had been wiped clean twice already, and the nine men still left from when Marcus had joined the squad had already long overshot their life expectancy.
    A noise caused Marcus to glance to his right.
    Salyez was grumbling and complaining again. His integrated comm. system was acting up. Every now and then, a few people would react badly to the comm. nanites in their system. Since the voice comm. was integrated with every soldier’s neural network, there was just about no way to remove it without doing some sort of damage.
    The result on those few, meant an itch right under the fifteen millimeters of metal nanites that just couldn’t be reached. TSA doctors had developed an injection they could give you that toned the problem down most of the way.
    It still drove some people crazy.
    Salyez was one of them. In the three years he had been in Squad A, Marcus had never been around him while he wasn’t complaining.
    Not that he cared.
    A green light in the ceiling above the soldiers came on, and the same soft female voice played in their voice comm. systems.
    “Frontiersman, begin launch preparations now, approximately one point five hours until engagement landing.”
  • Mr_Radical_EdMr_Radical_Ed Join Date: 2002-09-05 Member: 1285Members
    This is a good'n Ratfire. Rich in dialogue and original story telling

    <span style='color:red'>***two thumbs up***</span>

    <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif'><!--endemo-->
  • CanadianWolverineCanadianWolverine Join Date: 2003-02-07 Member: 13249Members
    Yummy, the tension builds, new characters are added, and that grumpy frontiersman still doesn't care. Keep it coming, you obviously take the time to explore minute details that make all the difference in the story coming across like you are right there. Thanks so much for the additional story, even though you did so nicely with the first part it could stand all on its own if it had to! Bravo! Sweet, you got me jonesing for more. <!--emo&:D--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'><!--endemo--> <!--emo&:D--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'><!--endemo--> <!--emo&:D--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'><!--endemo-->
  • That_Annoying_KidThat_Annoying_Kid Sire of Titles Join Date: 2003-03-01 Member: 14175Members, Constellation
    Greaz work ratfire, my ownly issues is that your SIG is too tall, and is eventaully going to get nuked by coil
  • RatfireRatfire Join Date: 2003-03-31 Member: 15091Members
    Yeah, it was pretty massive. Anyway, I nuked the old sig, and replaced it with this temp. I'll have the 3rd chapter of the story up in a few, I'm bogged down with research papers ATM!!!


    Ratfire
  • That_Annoying_KidThat_Annoying_Kid Sire of Titles Join Date: 2003-03-01 Member: 14175Members, Constellation
    "pimp"
    sounds good to me
  • RatfireRatfire Join Date: 2003-03-31 Member: 15091Members
    edited May 2003
    Here's Chapter 3! Yes I should have been doing actual homework but instead I did this. Go me, I'm screwed <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif'><!--endemo--> I hope you enjoy it though.

    Chapter 3

    ?A man can judge the value of his deeds today, by whether or not he is alive tomorrow.? -<i>Rear Admiral Michael Booth</i>

    Luckily the TSA wasn?t cheap, they spent a whole fifty-two resources to equip the Frontiersman when they landed.
    Stingy b****rds.
    Marcus spit, no damned monitors here to fine him anymore.
    He had read all the briefings about how much resource sludge was left over on these ships and colonies, and how forcing Frontiersman to take advantage of these open nozzles not only saved the TSA res, but also deprived the aliens of whatever was left, should the soldiers happen to fail at their objective.
    It was just another load of their crap. If they wanted their soldiers to survive, they?d have given them the res they needed to mount a real campaign.
    Not that he cared.
    Marcus was just a lock, stock, and barrel field sergeant, he shot what they told him to, and waited to make it back, or not.
    The TSAS Richard Bingham looked just as they had expected it to. Covered in alien crap, and teeming with way too many worthless Kharaa to rest for even a minute.
    Captain Yavkawitz had gone Com right after they landed. Everyone wanted to get in and out as fast as possible, the place was packed with <i>them</i>.
    Marcus and his team of three had moved out to the aft generator, carrying ten kilos of small explosives. A ten kilo warhead wouldn?t do much by conventional standards, but the TSA had assured the Captain that if placed in the aft generator, the leftover matter would be chain reacted by the explosive, triggering the destruction of most of the ship. Now the only thing that mattered was the two hundred and ten yards of bulk space in between his team and the aft generator.
    Richardson paused, and everyone stopped.
    The kid had good ears. On more than one occasion he had predicted a skulk attack, when no one else had heard a damn thing.
    ?C-brace left side, about fifteen degrees up? Richards whispered, pointing to a small sliver of brown near the ceiling ahead of them.
    Marcus squinted, sure enough, he could see it, or rather see its leg. They had spiked legs that looked too damn much like the broken pipes and wiring all over these ships. Unless you knew to look, half the time you wouldn?t even know one was there until it was right on top of you, and by then it was probably too late.
    Marcus gestured to his men, and they split into a preset formation, Richardson covering, while Marcus edged forward, and Galvan and Salyez shifted to the creatures flank.
    Marcus spoke into his voice comm, ?Salvo.?
    Instantly three rifles lit up the aft transport corridor with a hail of bullets, and moments later, a quivering skulk peeled off the wall and hit the floor with a dull thunk, spilling green bile as it landed.
    ?You sure you?re not one of them Gentechs Richy?? Galvan joked.
    Gentechs were the children of science, genetically altered to test what ?advancements? could be evolved into the human race.
    Richardson raised his left arm up to toss his cigarette back at Galvan
    ?Nah, I??
    A blur of brown hit Richardson knocking him to the floor.
    The skulk had come from an overhanging C-brace, no one had seen or heard anything. His arm had taken the force of the blow shattering the bones, and saving his life.
    Richardson had thrown his arms up to defend himself, the skulk was biting at him, trying to rip through to his face. That gave Marcus time to react.
    He made a split second decision, the skulk was too close to Richardson for Marcus to open fire. He dropped his LMG; shifted his hand to his leg in one fluid movement, and with a thunderous roar, hurled himself at the creature attacking his corporal.
    Richardson was still fighting to keep the skulk?s teeth away from his face when Marcus and his knife ripped through the alien. Marcus? full body weight was angled behind the blade, driving the entire four inch length of it?s razor sharp edge horizontally through the creature, nearly severing it in half.
    The skulk lay on the floor twitching, incapacitated, it?s eyes still watched their every move.
    ?Freaking thing is still alive,? he swore under his breath.
    The knife came down in a swift arc towards its head, the skulk shuddered and died.
    Marcus stood up, he still wasn?t sure whether or not these things felt pain, but he sure as hell hoped they did.
    He walked back over to Richardson, wiping vomit colored bile off the edges of his knife before re-sheathing it and picking up his LMG.
    ?You alright corporal??
    ?Ye?Yes?Yes, sir? Richardson stammered. ?I didn?t hear a damn thing, not one damned thing!?
    ?Command told us about the newer evolutions? Marcus replied ?They can be quiet as a ghost now.?
    Richardson just sat on the floor dazed.
    ?I?ve always been able to hear them, even the quiet ones.?
    He shook his head, finally getting up.
    ?Always? he said softly.
    ?Get your rifle,? said Marcus, "we've still got ten kilos to plant."
  • CanadianWolverineCanadianWolverine Join Date: 2003-02-07 Member: 13249Members
    Nice, very fleshed out action, and now the grumpy guy is showing why he is still alive, even though he doesn't care <!--emo&:D--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'><!--endemo--> Good stuff, I like what you're doing with it, and again, you left me wanting more! Please!
  • That_Annoying_KidThat_Annoying_Kid Sire of Titles Join Date: 2003-03-01 Member: 14175Members, Constellation
    W00T!

    excellent work, keep it up, more comments to come
  • CplDavisCplDavis I hunt the arctic Snonos Join Date: 2003-01-09 Member: 12097Members
    davis gives 2 thumbs up
  • That_Annoying_KidThat_Annoying_Kid Sire of Titles Join Date: 2003-03-01 Member: 14175Members, Constellation
    <!--QuoteBegin--Ratfire+Apr 15 2003, 04:20 AM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Ratfire @ Apr 15 2003, 04:20 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Luckily the TSA wasn’t cheap, they spent a whole fifty-two resources to equip the Frontiersman when they landed.
    <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    This little piece of humor kind of doesn't fit, becuase when one thinks of the frontiersmen they think of the branch of the TSA that is well funded and has the get go and the know how to get rid of the kaharaa menace, so I dunno

    thats my only source of contention, but it did make me laugh a bit
  • PFCNublarPFCNublar Join Date: 2003-04-23 Member: 15792Members
    edited April 2003
    nice. goody old character development. even the characters that might only have minor roles have deep development. beefy! i like it!
    ADDED:
    even i didn't get the humor till i read it over again and got it, so he's not alone. i think that you should put stuff like that in italics so we can recognize it easier.
  • That_Annoying_KidThat_Annoying_Kid Sire of Titles Join Date: 2003-03-01 Member: 14175Members, Constellation
    well maybe it wasn't humor but satire,
    there is a difference

    I dunno....
  • RatfireRatfire Join Date: 2003-03-31 Member: 15091Members
    It was sarcasm, and it really fits with Marcus' mentality. BTW even though you may see the TSA Frontiersman as "well funded" when ever you start an NS game, look what you start with, a Com chair, and a res tower. So basically the TSA drops you off with 52 res and 100 to get started, instead of just equipping the hell out of you with existing tech.


    Ratfire
  • That_Annoying_KidThat_Annoying_Kid Sire of Titles Join Date: 2003-03-01 Member: 14175Members, Constellation
    yeah, makes sense, but thats all those resourcefull TSA buggers need.
    <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif'><!--endemo-->
  • RatfireRatfire Join Date: 2003-03-31 Member: 15091Members
    edited May 2003
    I've updated all three chapters a little bit. Nothing major, just a little bit more intro, changed some errors and wording. Chapter 4 is still in the works, and I'm still looking for a place to put all of this stuff. Anyway, finals are coming up so no releases right now, maybe a week or two.

    Lovin the comments though <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif'><!--endemo-->


    Ratfire
  • That_Annoying_KidThat_Annoying_Kid Sire of Titles Join Date: 2003-03-01 Member: 14175Members, Constellation
    alrighty then, I look forward to do reading it.
  • RatfireRatfire Join Date: 2003-03-31 Member: 15091Members
    edited May 2003
    <img src='http://members.aol.com/fjo179/images/dh.jpg' border='0' alt='user posted image'>
    ?
  • LucidRealityLucidReality Join Date: 2003-02-13 Member: 13496Members
    edited May 2003
    <a href='http://www.geocities.com' target='_blank'> Geocities</a> <ive had unlimited space so far, so chek it out.

    <a href='http://www.brinkster.com' target='_blank'>Brinkster</a> <- check it out, might work for ya.

    If not, il keep looking. Keep up the good sotry work.

    and chekc out my thread <!--emo&;)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/wink.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wink.gif'><!--endemo-->

    <a href='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/index.php?act=ST&f=6&t=30579' target='_blank'>Into the Depths of Hell</a>
  • That_Annoying_KidThat_Annoying_Kid Sire of Titles Join Date: 2003-03-01 Member: 14175Members, Constellation
    <!--QuoteBegin--Ratfire+Apr 27 2003, 07:53 AM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Ratfire @ Apr 27 2003, 07:53 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> It was sarcasm, and it really fits with Marcus' mentality. BTW even though you may see the TSA Frontiersman as "well funded" when ever you start an NS game, look what you start with, a Com chair, and a res tower. So basically the TSA drops you off with 52 res and 100 to get started, instead of just equipping the hell out of you with existing tech.


    Ratfire <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    not if you have sv_cheats 1, and then do giveuprade 21, 24, 33, 38, 39
    (you have lvl 3 everything, MT, and you SPAWN with JP AND HA <!--emo&:0--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/wow.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wow.gif'><!--endemo-->
  • RatfireRatfire Join Date: 2003-03-31 Member: 15091Members
    edited May 2003
    <!--QuoteBegin--th@ annoying kid+May 8 2003, 03:37 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (th@ annoying kid @ May 8 2003, 03:37 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->not if you have sv_cheats 1, and then do giveuprade 21, 24, 33, 38, 39
    (you have lvl 3 everything, MT, and you SPAWN with JP AND HA  <!--emo&:0--><img src='http://www.natural-selection.org/forums/html/emoticons/wow.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wow.gif'><!--endemo--> <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
    ...
  • KhazModanKhazModan Join Date: 2003-04-14 Member: 15500Members, Constellation
    i envy people who can write like you. i think i am not bad but i am absolutly nothing compared to some od the stories ive read in this forum, yours is barging its way up my list and is fighting with my number one atm. have you read any Andy McNab books by any chance??? he has a similar style to you only first person.

    its very good, do you write for a living?
  • RatfireRatfire Join Date: 2003-03-31 Member: 15091Members
    Heh, thanks Khaz that is probably one of the best compliments this story has recieved. To answer your questions, no I'm not a writer, and I haven't read any of Andy McNab's books. In fact, book-wise I'm not much of a Sci-Fi fan. The only things I've really read sci-fi related (granted some of them are about the best books I have ever read) Are,

    Ender's Game - Orson Scott Card
    The Postman (Book, the movie sucked) - David Brin
    Starship Troopers (Again, the book) - Robert Heinlin

    Thanks for the comments everyone, I'm currently trapped up in my communications finals, but I've been righting two chapters side by side, so I'll have some more coming out later. Also, I should have a chance this summer to create a webpage on one of the freehosts that allows me to link the entire story from offsite, so that should work out pretty well.


    Ratfire
  • That_Annoying_KidThat_Annoying_Kid Sire of Titles Join Date: 2003-03-01 Member: 14175Members, Constellation
    <!--QuoteBegin--Ratfire+May 9 2003, 10:25 AM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Ratfire @ May 9 2003, 10:25 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> <!--QuoteBegin--th@ annoying kid+May 8 2003, 03:37 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (th@ annoying kid @ May 8 2003, 03:37 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->not if you have sv_cheats 1, and then do giveuprade 21, 24, 33, 38, 39
    (you have lvl 3 everything, MT, and you SPAWN with JP AND HA  <!--emo&:0--><img src='http://www.natural-selection.org/forums/html/emoticons/wow.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wow.gif'><!--endemo--> <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
    ... <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    I was making a reference to ingame play when your pwning bots....
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